How do you guys REALLY feel?

[Visionary]

3 minutes ago, arlin said:

Very beautiful. This could be the most spiritual thing i've herd on this forum very easily.

Most likely you have had poor relationship all your life or stuff from childhood which made you value loneliness and "Being different from everybody else". I don't know that, im just saying. Because this is my case.

Don't worry, this is the case with a lot a lot of people here. But they don't recognize it. 

Very recognizable my Friend. As a kid we've always felt pain. We never really learned how to deal with it all. If this mass confusion is good for something, it's for realizing we're in this together. There's a lot of beauty in it,  but we can only realize it if we stop hiding. 

This thirst for more more more has become a spiritual thirst for a lot of people. I'm not talking about sincere desires of course.

[arlin]

Just now, Visionary said:

Very recognizable my Friend. As a kid we've always felt pain. We never really learned how to deal with it all. If this mass confusion is good for something, it's for realizing we're in this together. There's a lot of beauty in it,  but we can only realize it if we stop hiding. 

This thirst for more more more has become a spiritual thirst for a lot of people. I'm not talking about sincere desires of course.

Yeah yeah, i get what you mean. Most people are just traumatized childen in need to cope.

Very little percentage of people here have done serious shadow work and childhood work on themselves first.

And getting to know the self can't be only a spiritual thing. It must be a human thing first.

[Visionary]

3 minutes ago, Jol356 said:

I feel oneness, stress, depression, manic, different phraces through the day

You got this bruv. I feel exactly the same <3. This is like a huge collective purge.

[Visionary]

This old man is good. Relaxing stuff. Lotsa soul.

[arlin]

@Meta-Man Insanely beautifull. Thank you very much for the words!

[Visionary]

6 minutes ago, Meta-Man said:

Great topic. I’m a huge advocate of self-disclosure. Having no secrets and being vulnerable equals loss of control. In my experience whenever I’ve put up a front of any kind, life has always been loyal and slapped me across the cheek in some humiliating way.

Short story; I was desperately seeking to return to the joy childhood after discovering nothing obtainable/material was worthwhile. Through divine intervention I got my hands on The Power of Now. Upon first reading the first few pages I thought «This is what I’ve been looking for my whole life». Thereafter something started to wake up in the ‘background’. Watching Joe Rogan, it lead me to Terence Mckenna, which again lead me to taking psychedelics. I had to know what that state ‘Enlightenment’ was like. 

Psilocybin delivered the goods and after surrendering completely I had my first glimpse/awakening, where all my inhibitions were momentarily taken away. I was looking down at my feet and it was like I remembered Myself. The separation between my body and the rest of the visual field dissolved and the Consciousness = Reality revelation revealed itself. My body became completely ‘un-stiff’ and I became socially uninhibited in a sober way. It was free of the whole social prison. Complete disregard. I could have walked out naked in times square and take a shit on the pavement in front of everybody at that point. Looking at the body in the mirror it was a nameless ape/monkey. It was like waking up in an avatar on Pandora (Avatar the movie)

Then I was saddened and despaired over the fact that the experience left me and my only question was «how can I return to this state and STAY FOREVER?» Nothing else mattered. 

My ‘first huge step’ toward this  was actually to commit social suicide on facebook by the way of extreme public self-disclosure, after an extreme emotional build up that happened a month later.

I was simply so sick of being limited and inauthentic, and people being inauthentic. All the shallowness of ordinary life and the social game prison. It was the biggest turning point of my life, because a ton of bridges were burned, even though I got a lot of likes on the post, some people were applauding it. Some even said it was the most real intimate thing they ever read (not bragging, just giving you some idea) At that point it was beyond repair. The life I once lived ended in a flash.

Then started the long ardous process of letting go of myself and everything ever held dear forever. If psychedelics is comparable to a bungee jump, where you have your rope attached, what I call liberation, my goal, is akin to jumping out of an airplane without a parachute and never hitting the ground, because there is no ground.

As of today I feel allright. The highs and lows arent as extreme as they were when I first got on the path. Some days/moments I am seeing things very clearly. Other times I lose myself a bit. But in a sense it doesn’t really matter, because I always know where to return to. All my fuck ups have pushed me in the right direction. Everyday you learn. Suffering is the compass. I went through all that and I’m still here which is a testament to the spiritual path. Even though I haven’t reached the ultimate release yet and I still suffer now and then, I am edging in on it everyday.

Just yesterday as I was walking down the street it wasn’t awkward walking past people. I hardly contracted at all. And when that happens I see reality clearly. I see people as they are. Just actors. And my eyes are wide open, welcoming everyone and everything. Making love to the trees, listen to birds singing in the alive stillness. Smiling at the girls walking by (getting great feedback btw ), thinking to myself «My God I love EVERYTHING. Thank you Thank you THANK YOU.». And it only gets better and better. It’s justs a matter of time before I become unlimited. My life is the best life ever. Thank you suffering for showing me the way Home. 

I hope that was helpful.. Straight from the heart. No filters.

Your suffering is an invitation to turn your life from gray soulless concrete garbage into the ultimate Love affair. Be thankful for it. It is your friend. Die before you die. You are going to die anyway.

Peace out my brothers and sisters. I love you all.

Thank you.

I love you too. 

The girls thing really cracked me up hahaha. They see your light. As do I. 

Namaste brother

[traveler]

I dont feel great physically. I have a lot of pressure in my head every day. I can't have a good sleep, and I cant breathe through my nose because of sinus pressure. 

All in all I'm pretty disoriented, hopeless and confused. Also fear, as my normal state of consciousness wants to expand. I dont know what that entails, if I let go into total unknowing.

Edited April 1, 2020 by traveler

[Visionary]

15 minutes ago, traveler said:

I dont feel great physically. I have a lot of pressure in my head every day. I can't have a good sleep, and I cant breathe through my nose because of sinus pressure. 

All in all I'm pretty disoriented, hopeless and confused. Also fear, as my normal state of consciousness wants to expand. I dont know what that entails, if I let go into total unknowing.

So many people brother, so many people experience this. 

I feel that grounding myself helps a lot. 

There was some knee-jerk reaction in me that said: i feel this suffering, so this must be ego. So i must do this and that to plot my way out of this confusion and feeling. We need to stop this over-analyzing and just be with our feelings and confusion like a warm blanket. 

Wish you the best.

Edited April 1, 2020 by Visionary

[Nahm]

I feel like the tug of war is counterintuitively won in letting go. 

I feel like diet is more important than psychology.

I feel like talking about love with anyone who forgot.

I feel like that is impossible. Except I can do it. 

[fridjonk]

5 minutes ago, Nahm said:

I feel like talking about love with anyone who forgot.

I feel like that is impossible. Except I can do it. 

Exactly the same for me man. I feel like after having a big awakening, society and people I know are the reason my mind closes down back to normal so fast. Because It's hard to express it to people who will look at you like a weirdo. But ultimately I shouldn't care, and I feel like I don't, but yet I don't do anything about it. 

I guess it will have to happen one day or another. 

 

[Prevailer]

9 minutes ago, Nahm said:

I feel like the tug of war is counterintuitively won in letting go. 

I feel like diet is more important than psychology.

I feel like talking about love with anyone who forgot.

I feel like that is impossible. Except I can do it. 

Love it...

[Visionary]

17 minutes ago, Nahm said:

I feel like the tug of war is counterintuitively won in letting go. 

I feel like diet is more important than psychology.

I feel like talking about love with anyone who forgot.

I feel like that is impossible. Except I can do it. 

 

[Nahm]

And now I feel y’all. So gosh darn good. 

[Nemo28]

I feel lazy, dissatisfied, wishing i had witch girlfriend not to feel so alone 

[SoonHei]

is it water? or is it liquid+wetness?

[Thittato]

6 hours ago, Visionary said:

Thank you man. This helps me surrender too. Thanks for taking your time. 

This chaos affects so many people. I've been living like a monk the past 2 years. Now that everything is restricted things are really really challenging. I realize that my time as a "monk" was all to realize that we're in this together. 

Spirituality is nothing for me without other human/living beings. I just want to share my vulnerability and love with others. I'm done with this competition mind set where I live in my own bubble to outgrow everyone. 

That sounds beautiful :-)

[Galyna]

This is a great question...I feel like I am observing someone, who is apparently "me". So I am observing this entity who has lots of passion inside. I am observing how this entity tries to let go and surrender but fails over and over again. I am observing a crazy desire that is burning inside. I am observing the pain and the hell that my desire gives me. I am observing that I am hopeless and should play this role to the end. I know that nothing will save me since I am not in control. I can not wish, I can not pray, I can not want...and this is my surrender....

I am optimistic that this will pass and I will be reborn again. I know for sure that one morning I wake up and this will not matter. I am sure that this is just a temporary state of my being. When approaching closer this realization, I have peace and harmony inside. I am just a part of this ever changing reality. No feeling or emotion can stay forever. I am always changing and there are so many facets about me that I haven't fathomed yet. This gives me power and nourishes my mental fortitude. 

But, right now it hurts and almost unbearable...

Good luck with letting go and surrendering. I know it is hard. 

[Osaid]

My sleep schedule is horrible right now.

I feel lost as to what I should be doing in life.

I am not getting enough sunlight and haven't been out in a while because of COVID 19.

I also feel that I am lazy.

But, it's not like i'm depressed or anything. These are things I look forward to overcoming. I can't wait to actually go outside after all this time.

[VeganAwake]

Empty, surrendered, unattached, neutral, chameleon like, desire/expectation less, free floating, nobody, quiet, unreal, alone, blank, dreamlike, unimportant, nada.

[Gili Trawangan]

How I feel depends on the moment you ask.. sometimes peaceful, sometimes agitated, sometimes happy, sometimes worried; fulfilled and content or still searching for something, lonely or feeling bliss.. it's a constant roller-coaster. But that which I really Am does not change