Sexual vibes on LSD!

[Bazooka Jesus]

Hi all, so yesterday I went on another Magical Mystery Tour with my dear friend Lucy -- and I am more than pleased to report that this time around I once again got treated to the whole five star menu including sweet desert and cheese platter (after a sort-of-underwhelming high dose trip three weeks ago that got me wondering if I might have developed a permanent tolerance against my favorite chemical)!

Man, it is quite interesting to see how the quality of these trips is changing over time. It seems that after my super-rapturous ego death experience on 7g of mushrooms two months ago - which felt like a freaking supernova of bliss and love -, I am now able to enter a more sober state of self-transcendence than ever before that allows me to do a sort of level-headed inventory and look at myself from a rather objective outside perspective, almost like a doctor who is scrutinizing one of his patients with a stethoscope, all the while maintaining an attitude of "alright, let's just cut all of the mystical crap for a minute and really take a good look at what exactly is the matter with that strange fellow who claims to be me".

Well, that is one side of it. On the other side however, it seems that my LSD trips now have more sexual overtones than ever before. Especially in the early stage of yesterday's trip, it was almost like my repressed and neglected sexual energy came bursting out of its closet, tapped me on the shoulder and said "Hey man, remember me? I am that masculine life force that is boiling inside of you, and I am here to tell you that you better take off the lid and let off the steam before the whole damn kettle blows up right in your face!" Very surprising & interesting. It felt kind of like an invitation to just let go of (the illusion of) control and let the body do what it is itching to do instead of constantly trying to browbeat it into shame and submission. Oh boy, it almost looks like I will have to start approaching girls again after this whole Coronavirus situation is over, lol!

Can anyone else relate to that? I would be especially curious to hear if this kind of sexually charged trip experience is specifically a male thing or if some of our fellow female psychonauts on this forum have had similar stuff happening to them under the influence!

Edited March 29, 2020 by Bazooka Jesus

[Leo Gura]

It is not a male thing or a female thing since both are just imaginary aspects of your Self.

There are no males or females! You imagined them all, you clever fuck!

There are no fellow psychonauts! Only you!

I love you.

[Bazooka Jesus]

@Leo Gura I love you too, you beautiful bald bastard.

[Crystalous]

13 minutes ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Hi all, so yesterday I went on another Magical Mystery Tour with my dear friend Lucy -- and I am more than pleased to report that this time around I once again got treated to the whole five star menu including sweet desert and cheese platter (after a sort-of-underwhelming high dose trip three weeks ago that got me wondering if I might have developed a permanent tolerance against my favorite chemical)!

Man, it is quite interesting to see how the quality of these trips is changing over time. It seems that after my super-rapturous ego death experience on 7g of mushrooms two months ago - which felt like a freaking supernova of bliss and love -, I am now able to enter a more sober state of self-transcendence than ever before that allows me to do a sort of level-headed inventory and look at myself from a rather objective outside perspective, almost like a doctor who is scrutinizing one of his patients with a stethoscope, all the while maintaining an attitude of "alright, let's just cut all of the mystical crap for a minute and really take a good look at what exactly is the matter with that strange fellow who claims to be me".

Well, that is one side of it. On the other side however, it seems that my LSD trips now have more sexual overtones than ever before. Especially in the early stage of yesterday's trip, it was almost like my repressed and neglected sexual energy came bursting out of its closet, tapped me on the shoulder and said "Hey man, remember me? I am that masculine life force that is boiling inside of you, and I am here to tell you that you better take off the lid and let off the steam before the whole damn kettle blows up right in your face!" Very surprising & interesting. It felt kind of like an invitation to just let go of (the illusion of) control and let the body do what it is itching to do instead of constantly trying to browbeat it into shame and submission. Oh boy, it almost looks like I will have to start approaching girls again after this whole Coronavirus situation is over, lol!

Can anyone else relate to that? I would be especially curious to hear if this kind of sexually charged trip experience is specifically a male thing or if some of our fellow female psychonauts on this forum have had similar stuff happening to them under the influence!

Μy man acid really helps me the same way.Drop aciiiiiiiid 

[mandyjw]

@Bazooka Jesus Aren't you the child of a former Catholic priest?  Reality is stranger than fiction. 

Edited March 29, 2020 by mandyjw

[Girzo]

I have had visions about sexuality on LSD, women with dicks, men with vaginas, 50 new genders and organs in all shapes, sizes and possible configurations, and to top it, mammals mixed with insects.

It's all relative, there's nothing inherently feminine or masculine to reality, that's the insight.

[Bazooka Jesus]

1 hour ago, mandyjw said:

@Bazooka Jesus Aren't you the child of a former Catholic priest? Reality is stranger than fiction. 

What can I say, my old man wasn't exactly your run-of-the-mill pastor, heh. 

It is kind of strange that I have such a stick up my ass about sexuality; my parents may both have been neurotic basket cases, but they were actually both pretty liberal minded as far as sexuality is concerned, so I cannot say that my hang-ups in that area of life are the result of a conservative upbringing. (I think it's safe to say though that my relationship to my wacky mother definitely spoiled my relationship to women in general, which is a fucking shame. I mean, I love women, but it seems like I simply cannot deal with them!)

Edited March 29, 2020 by Bazooka Jesus

[Bazooka Jesus]

@Girzo Holy cow. Sounds like you're waaaaaaaaaaay ahead of me, lol!

[Girzo]

Nah, I don't think so. But I had read The Red Queen by Matt Ridley a few years ago and this vision was like viewing this book in an actualized version.

It's LSD that is ahead of us all 

Edited March 29, 2020 by Girzo

[mandyjw]

1 hour ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

What can I say, my old man wasn't exactly your run-of-the-mill pastor, heh. 

It is kind of strange that I have such a stick up my ass about sexuality; my parents may both have been neurotic basket cases, but they were actually both pretty liberal minded as far as sexuality is concerned, so I cannot say that my hang-ups in that area of life are the result of a conservative upbringing. (I think it's safe to say though that my relationship to my wacky mother definitely spoiled my relationship to women in general, which is a fucking shame. I mean, I love women, but it seems like I simply cannot deal with them!)

My theory is that what we call kundalini energy is translated/interpreted by the mind as sex energy, because it both is and it isn't. If God is Love, sex is the most intense expression of Love that most of us imagine, it's sort of where love and survival instincts merge yet are surrendered, are sex and love separate? 

My awakening had very confusing romantic undertones, felt like can't eat, can't sleep fallen in Love... bliss... but with everything, not one particular person yet no excluding particular people both dead or alive, real or fictional. Felt like a mix between Mary Magdalene, a Disney princess and this.  Awakening is pround...ly ridiculous. 

My guess is that you're starting to translate the Love/ Union aspect of Gods by the subconscious. Just as dreams come up with ridiculous symbols to communicate to us, we ARE those ridiculous symbols. 

Don't blame your mom, deeply question all of that and all the beliefs and assumptions around it. You can't fix it if you don't take responsibility and you can't take responsibility if you're blaming her, either consciously or unconsciously. 

 

[Bazooka Jesus]

8 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

My theory is that what we call kundalini energy is translated/interpreted by the mind as sex energy, because it both is and it isn't. If God is Love, sex is the most intense expression of Love that most of us imagine, it's sort of where love and survival instincts merge yet are surrendered, are sex and love separate?

My sexual outbursts during the trip definitely had a strong nondual component to it. There was this notion of "Dude, you are just lusting after yourself here, so what the heck is there to be timid about? Just surrender to it all and enjoy the show!" Now, if only I could adapt this kind of attitude to so-called real life...

[Bazooka Jesus]

1 hour ago, mandyjw said:

Don't blame your mom, deeply question all of that and all the beliefs and assumptions around it. You can't fix it if you don't take responsibility and you can't take responsibility if you're blaming her, either consciously or unconsciously.

Hm. Would you give the same kind of advice to someone who experienced sexual abuse as a kid? I mean, I can see your point; I am just wondering if ignoring the cause really helps with healing the symptoms.

You see, I actually don't blame my mom. I do not believe in guilt; however, I do believe in cause and effect, even if these are just part of the illusory dream state. If I said "I am sitting in a wheelchair because I fell down a flight of stairs fifteen years ago", would you assume that I blame the stairs for my current state? Of course the stairs are not to blame, just as my mother is not to blame for anything. I am just stating that there seems to be a very probable correlation here; nothing more, nothing less.

Edited March 29, 2020 by Bazooka Jesus

[mandyjw]

@Bazooka Jesus It's not about ignoring the cause, it's being open to seeing it from a new perspective, outside oneself. The past is not the past in the way we think it is, we are writing those memories anew in every moment. Shadow work is literally rewriting your past because the memory and negative feelings about it are completely based on nothing. People often react to being told that strongly unless they deeply desire to awaken, or deeply suffer for it and desire to transcend it. People react so strongly because their ego is based on those negative feelings being based on something. The ego is that something itself. 

It all sounds very stupid and avoidant, I realize that, but it's not in experience. Shadow work bubbles up on it's own and things are seen in a new light when one makes the more general intention to feel good and live life with an open heart. Sometimes it's not about avoiding but identifying the direction we want to go in and making the intention to feel good in general until we're ready to tackle the more threatening offending specifics head on. And sometimes we may need support from "others" to do that.