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Preety_India

The HEALING ROAD

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One thing I really want to be able to do is ABC automatic body control through the use of meditation. 

 

 


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On 5/5/2020 at 0:11 AM, Preety_India said:

 

I think you're dealing with a turmoil period. Can be incredibly frustrating. You are showing existential crisis symptoms. 

You're possibly looking for a structure or framework or a launchpad in life. It will neither come easy nor will it come any sooner. 

You need to slowly build your base to grow from, your substratum. Take it easy. 

Don't be upset because of the frustration. This frustration is necessary for some time to learn certain skills and to learn acceptance of failures in life. People who bypass this stage think that life is always perfect and therefore they can never actually face life when things go wrong. 

This period of frustration and uncertainty is a necessary conditioning to be able accept life in its full form. So don't feel bad if you are going through this. 

One thing you really need to do is let go of perfection completely. There will be obsessive thoughts about perfection. Detach that thought. 

Don't wait for a perfect time or perfect day for things to be perfect. Accept the imperfection of a day.. 

Keep a dream board. Also keep strict focus all the time on things that are really essential for your growth. But allocate your time properly. Like for example don't use all your time to learn about life purpose or dating or spirituality. Dedicate certain amounts of time. Use your important time for job skills and health related stuff. 

Do not take everything at one time, as a perfectionist you might feel like time is too short, but take it easy, there's a ton of time. 

Focus on balance. Try to keep a proper balance between all aspects of your life. Don't exercise too much. Don't distract too much. Everything in balance. 

Also be very positive. Perfectionists might assume the future to be negative. Remove that negativity. Calm your mind with positive hope.. Think that everything is going to get fixed eventually. 

One of the problems that I can see in your post is that you are too attached to your life. If you are passionate person, this is expected. However being so attached can create a ton of frustration and can be a constant source of torment. So detach. Learn to let go. Learn to be free of everything. Have focus when you need it but during other times learn to be just be free of all thoughts. Otherwise they will consume you. 

 

So the key points are 

  • Focus 
  • Accept imperfections 
  • Dreamboard as a base or framework 
  • Allocate time properly 
  • Think using abundance. Think there is lot of time
  • Keep Balance 
  • Be positive 
  • Learn to be free

 

 

On 5/5/2020 at 0:31 AM, Preety_India said:

@28 cm unbuffed  

It's good to be ambitious. But I think you're taking a lot on your plate. 

I know it's difficult to draw a line. Let the obsession be in doses. So you are obsessed only when you need it to progress. It's like the saying "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" 

Right now you're on mental steroids. You are super excited to achieve everything. But slow down. It can consume you. 

Tao is very good for balance. 

When you have to take a break, focus on the break, not on progress. 

Never think that you are missing out on something. You are never missing out on anything, it's only a mind trick. 

Learn to break your mental pattern. When you need the motivation, let the obsession come back. Keep a cycle. A cycle of progress and a cycle of slowing down. This way it becomes rhythmic and gets automatically balanced out. Waxing waning type. 

 

 

 

I think you're dealing with a turmoil period. Can be incredibly frustrating. You are showing existential crisis symptoms. 

You're possibly looking for a structure or framework or a launchpad in life. It will neither come easy nor will it come any sooner. 

You need to slowly build your base to grow from, your substratum. Take it easy. 

Don't be upset because of the frustration. This frustration is necessary for some time to learn certain skills and to learn acceptance of failures in life. People who bypass this stage think that life is always perfect and therefore they can never actually face life when things go wrong. 

This period of frustration and uncertainty is a necessary conditioning to be able accept life in its full form. So don't feel bad if you are going through this. 

One thing you really need to do is let go of perfection completely. There will be obsessive thoughts about perfection. Detach that thought. 

Don't wait for a perfect time or perfect day for things to be perfect. Accept the imperfection of a day.. 

Keep a dream board. Also keep strict focus all the time on things that are really essential for your growth. But allocate your time properly. Like for example don't use all your time to learn about life purpose or dating or spirituality. Dedicate certain amounts of time. Use your important time for job skills and health related stuff. 

Do not take everything at one time, as a perfectionist you might feel like time is too short, but take it easy, there's a ton of time. 

Focus on balance. Try to keep a proper balance between all aspects of your life. Don't exercise too much. Don't distract too much. Everything in balance. 

Also be very positive. Perfectionists might assume the future to be negative. Remove that negativity. Calm your mind with positive hope.. Think that everything is going to get fixed eventually. 

One of the problems that I can see in your post is that you are too attached to your life. If you are passionate person, this is expected. However being so attached can create a ton of frustration and can be a constant source of torment. So detach. Learn to let go. Learn to be free of everything. Have focus when you need it but during other times learn to be just be free of all thoughts. Otherwise they will consume you. 

 

So the key points are 

Focus 

Accept imperfections 

Dreamboard as a base or framework 

Allocate time properly 

Think using abundance. Think there is lot of time

Keep Balance 

Be positive 

Learn to be free

 

 

 

 

It's good to be ambitious. But I think you're taking a lot on your plate. 

I know it's difficult to draw a line. Let the obsession be in doses. So you are obsessed only when you need it to progress. It's like the saying "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" 

Right now you're on mental steroids. You are super excited to achieve everything. But slow down. It can consume you. 

Tao is very good for balance. 

When you have to take a break, focus on the break, not on progress. 

Never think that you are missing out on something. You are never missing out on anything, it's only a mind trick. 

Learn to break your mental pattern. When you need the motivation, let the obsession come back. Keep a cycle. A cycle of progress and a cycle of slowing down. This way it becomes rhythmic and gets automatically balanced out. Waxing waning type. 

 

 


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Certain things I need to focus on

I've realized that it's important for me to have a sense of control.. 

  • Toxicity removal 
  • Replacement with good
  • Now only having good is not enough because that's like filling a basket with all the chocolates and goodies. You also need a sense of direction once the healing is set in motion and the toxicity removed. Also you will need to remove the right stones and add the right fertilizer. You can't simply be very random about this spiritual cleansing process.. You can't do all this in a chaotic haphazard way. How to avoid getting stuck only doing something beneficial?.... Use a goal setter. Have a proper vision. Now align your mini goals and actions both of removal and addition to the main vision.. This way you know exactly what you are doing and why you are doing it. At any point of time, no matter how tiresome it is, putting this effort is worth it, you have to be a sureshot, you have to know at every point or step, the logical flow of things and how you are fitting things into a pattern, such that, in the greater scheme of things, it'll always make good sense, this means that you have to be very self assured about whatever you are doing, assured of what and why you are doing what you are doing. Consider it like a recipe. You can add whatever you want but then you aren't very sure about how the recipe is going to turn out. Yet when you know exactly what you need to put and you add that, then you know how your recipe is going to taste. This basically means that you have a sense of direction or you're creating a sense of direction. 
  • Of course you need a goal list. But first have a core plan. And also have key goals or core goals. Now, all of these key goals and other goals from the goal list need to be attuned to this core plan, and then have a general vision/understanding of how everything else in your life is going to fit into this core plan. 
  • Purification of the mind 
  • Reassurance 
  • Be open with yourself. 
  • Patience 
  • Focus.. Not losing focus 
  • Keeping a track 
  • Have consistency with yourself 
  • Reshaping the mind 
  • A goal list of course 
  • Readjustment  to current paradigm and renewal of self growth 
  • Cleansing the mind 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Look at it almost like you are healing your skin. 

 

You're literally rolling in toxins. >:(

 

 

40kd0a.jpg

 

And what's the point of healing your skin in other parts and leaving the wounds open. It's the places where you see the wounds that precisely need your healing balm. 

But first remove that big pile of dirt over your skin. Only then you can see those wounds. Idiot. 

 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Learn to integrate both the key goals and the superficial junk  of your life into your core plan and have clarity on what you want. 

This basically translates as perfect Resonance. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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The fear of uncertainty is very strong in me.. 

The fear of the unknown and the fear of uncertainty. 

I try not to think too much but sometimes I'm gripped by a sinking feeling in my stomach. 

 

I wish... Life was easy. 


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For some odd reason, Sharon Grimberg has become my latest inspiration for life 

I'm always looking for a woman who can inspire me. 

 

 


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On 4/22/2020 at 11:28 PM, Preety_India said:

Sweet love ❤️❤️ to Andrew. 

 

This call recording I saved of Andrew when he called me last night and he said a lot of sweet things and I was really excited so I recorded his voice on my phone. Dizzy 

 

Just little things he says and does that make me so happy and excited. 

Excited to meet him when he comes home after all this coronavirus. 

 

 

andrew call recording.mp3

Edited by Preety_India

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I broke up with Joseph on March 13 and started this journal on March 27 to start my journey to healing. 

At the same time I always had Andrew by my side supporting me throughout and we fell in love with each other. It was a tumultuous situation for me because everything was happening so fast, I had no idea. 

Andrew had to leave for work to another city and that's when the whole coronavirus situation went down. 

Andrew left for the other city on March 22 and the lockdown was announced on March 25.

It took a toll on me. I was grasping for the straws. 

But Andrew never left me alone. Throughout the month of April we remained close and he protected me and gave me an emotional cover 

He was instrumental in my breakup recovery. 

We knew we had feelings for each other and we couldn't hide it anymore. 

This is my fourth relationship after 3 failed relationships in the past. 

My first relationship was when I was just 19 in college and it lasted only 6 months. 

My second relationship was for a year after that. 

My third relationship was with Joseph for last 3 years, it began in 2017, and ended in March 2020. It was very passionate but also abusive. I have extensively written about it. It was my most long lasting relationship till date and the most spontaneous, tumultuous and a total roller-coaster. It took a massive toll on my health. I suffered a huge amount of narcissistic abuse throughout the relationship with Joseph. Although I considered Joseph to be my true soulmate, he was not meant to be. 

 

 

And this is my fourth. With Andrew. 

And I finally feel like I found The One. 

Andrew is very different from Joseph. Sweet and caring. 

I'm hoping this relationship would last forever. 

I didn't give up hope despite 3 failed relationships. I'm surprised that I still have the capacity to fall in love for the fourth time. My fuel hasn't completely exhausted yet. 

All I can do is pray that this relationship doesn't end like the others because I'm too tired keeping up my loving energy. 

Andrew is not an asshole. He is a good guy. Not like the past ones. 

Edited by Preety_India

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It's time for me to get things together. 

 

To weave my yarn 

 

40ujtf.gif

 


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Putting all elements together so they fit into a coherent loop fashion sequence based pattern 

 

40ujpr.gif

 

 


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This post from Keyhole really resonates with me. 

With today's level of consciousness, that's what I am afraid of...
That's because you're a beautiful Asian woman, men will be decent to you.
Honest energy isn't always truth or love - often times it is hatred, revenge, ect - this is where I feel that people get mixed up in that they think that the lower energies are less honest - they're still the same thing but at a lower frequency, they are the fire and ashes that give life to the soil for a new forest to grow.  Really, any emotion at all, as long as it is felt raw and as it is without it needing to be something else is the truth.  Just my 2c.
I don't believe it always does start with healing one's self first, I think that this is a byproduct of the bystander effect, diffusion of societal responsibility.  I've witnessed this in action when I was in desperate need of help and reached out a few years back.  Humans both cause problems to others and then expect them to be the ones to fix the damage.  Within spirituality, this works if someone is already at one level, but there are many who are not there yet - and can be met with one dimensional spiritual answers from folks who are also still learning what these pointers are referring to.

The divine feminine is multi-faceted (many faced).  It is both a giver of life and a destroyer.
So it may very well push us to growth, but not without laying waste to the old paradigms, often times in polarizing and unexpected ways.

 

Those are some golden nuggets. I have always believed that the honest expression of emotion is also spirituality. 

It would be hypocritical to hide true emotions just for the sake of appearing or being high conscious. 

Being just yourself is also an expression of freedom. Freedom is also love. 

 


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On 5/8/2020 at 5:22 AM, Preety_India said:

Look at it almost like you are healing your skin. 

 

You're literally rolling in toxins. >:(

 

 

40kd0a.jpg

 

And what's the point of healing your skin in other parts and leaving the wounds open. It's the places where you see the wounds that precisely need your healing balm. 

But first remove that big pile of dirt over your skin. Only then you can see those wounds. Idiot. 

 

 

 

This analogy helps me a lot. 

 

 


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Being in Resonance is similar to the principle of Tao

 

 


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I'm moving from little things like culture and race and bullshit into a place of freedom, beauty and peace and love. 

And by beauty I don't mean makeup and clothes and bullshit...... That's petty of course. 

But beauty of the heart. 

 

 

 

40yrn3.jpg

 


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Somehow this felt so niceyyyy

 


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Andrew called me a cranky kitten today. I was being moody with him. 

Hahaha xD

I like how he gives me all these names. 

 

Then he kissed me. 

 

 

 

 

 


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Life is not just about playing with flowers. 

It's also about playing with fire 

But at the same time not getting burned by the fire. 

 

A dance with the demons to slay the demon. Before the demons devour you. 

 

Dance like Kali and pass through fire. 

40zwf7.jpg

 

 

 

40zwgv.jpg

 

Dance like Shiva and find your way through chaos. 

 

 

4108z5.jpg

 

Edited by Preety_India

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There is so much emotion in this. 

 


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