Mikael89

Not liked by anyone

91 posts in this topic

Having a difficult time again..

I don't think 99.9% of people understand how it feels to be completely alone and not liked by a single person, not even by anyone online..

And what makes it even worse is that when I do talk or write with someone he/she starts to dislike me after a while, and then that person disappears from my life. So that confirms that I am unlikable. All those rejections.

I don't want any replies where you say "I like you", because in my book, if you don't write/talk to me every day and also often take initiative to contact me then you don't like me, at least not enough.

When I do have contact with someone who I like I do everything in my power to make him/her like me, but it's futile.

Is anyone else here in the same situation?

Edited by Mikael89

"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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1 minute ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Do you like yourself?

Well, no.

I don't think I can suddenly start to like myself. And even if I would it would be of no good, because I would still be alone.


"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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@Mikael89 You can't expect others to like you if you do not even like yourself. Also you can like yourself. A sure fire way to not like yourself though, is to tell yourself that you can't like yourself. 

Step 1. Learn to like your self. Whatever it takes. Find a path/map that will teach you to like yourself.

Step 2. Others will like you when you like yourself. It's hard to like someone who doesn't even like themselves. 

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25 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

@Mikael89 You can't expect others to like you if you do not even like yourself. Also you can like yourself. A sure fire way to not like yourself though, is to tell yourself that you can't like yourself. 

Step 1. Learn to like your self. Whatever it takes. Find a path/map that will teach you to like yourself.

Step 2. Others will like you when you like yourself. It's hard to like someone who doesn't even like themselves. 

Okay but the problem is that I don't know what I could like about myself.

17 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@Mikael89 ♥️


"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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1 hour ago, Mikael89 said:

in my book, if you don't write/talk to me every day and also often take initiative to contact me then you don't like me, at least not enough

By that criteria, nobody likes me either.

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15 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

By that criteria, nobody likes me either.

Hm.. okay.

I can't explain it.

Edited by Mikael89

"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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Look for people that like you for who you are. Don't try to "fit in", to meet other expectations about you. You should be the one, that decides what people you want in your life and how your tribe will look like. It's harsh and not that easy to cut off people, that do not meet your needs anymore, you'll be alone for some time, but you will be a lot more happy and fullfilled in a long run. 

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@28 cm unbuffed I guess that makes sense.

Actually I have some contacts who don't really like me. But I have been stubborn and kept contacting them and trying to make them like me, but I will stop with it now. Bye bye all my half-assed contacts who don't like me enough.

I'm talking about internet stuff now. Irl I don't have even any half-assed contacts.

Edited by Mikael89

"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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i like you, youre a fascinating person, for real

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@Mikael89 There comes a time in your life, when you realise, that these contact were really just something like Netflix - fake shit, to fill the void that you have inside of you. And it doesn't serve you at all, just drains you out of energy and time. Fuck that dude - it sounds egotistic, but focusing on yourself FULLY will help you to find true connections, paradoxically. People that will want to contact, meet and talk to you, about real stuff. And you will want to be with them. And it will not be something half-assed, forced, it will be full of passion and inspiration. 

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4 minutes ago, Rilles said:

i like you, youre a fascinating person, for real

Oh, thanks 😛🙂

1 minute ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

@Mikael89 There comes a time in your life, when you realise, that these contact were really just something like Netflix - fake shit, to fill the void that you have inside of you. And it doesn't serve you at all, just drains you out of energy and time. Fuck that dude - it sounds egotistic, but focusing on yourself FULLY will help you to find true connections, paradoxically. People that will want to contact, meet and talk to you, about real stuff. And you will want to be with them. And it will not be something half-assed, forced, it will be full of passion and inspiration. 

I see. I don't know about that.. but maybe..


"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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@Mikael89 I have a simular problem, almost everyone except my family and close friends seem to not like me because I'm anxious and often don't say "hello" when I come to work and don't make jokes and small talk like everyone else.

But one part of anxiety is that deep down subconciously you don't like other people aswell, when you truly love other people and want to talk to them you will overcome anxiety.

I've had alot of rejections like the ones you mention and that often happens, where after a while when the person finds out more about me they don't like me, I believe this is due to depression and anxiety. But luckily I have a small handful of people who I've been talking to for months and years and they support me and message me regularly. 
 

You have to also do your part and message them too, if you don't like them they won't like you back. Relationships are a part of duality, people only like you because you're giving them certain benefits, for example emotional stimulation, and you expect benefits to come back to you from them.

Edited by AwakenedSoul444

 

Every dark night always has a bright end. 

- Author unknown

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@AwakenedSoul444 But you have close friends, that's good.

Yes I have to do my part too but I'm not going to accept that I have to do 99% of the effort and the other one 1%.


"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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17 minutes ago, Mikael89 said:

@AwakenedSoul444 But you have close friends, that's good.

Yes I have to do my part too but I'm not going to accept that I have to do 99% of the effort and the other one 1%.

I have no friends in real life.

It feels like that, because you're bumping in to toxic people, and you just think everyone is like that. I believe most people in this damn world are like that, and pretty much everyone from school that I went to was too. My sister's friends most of them like and accept me though, even with my anxiety.


 

Every dark night always has a bright end. 

- Author unknown

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@Mikael89 I have been in the same situation in the past.

You need to understand that what you believe is not true. You need to understand that YOU are the one saying "nobody likes me". Has anyone told you that before? You need to realise that YOU are the one making up the rules: "disappearing from my life = I am not loved". People leave for all sorts of reasons. 

You say no one likes you, does that include yourself? You don't like yourself so much that you need others to like you for you? Other people are just as mentally ill as you are, do you really think they have time to make sure you feel liked aswell? All those people need help. They deep down are in pain like you are. 

How can you expect others to like you if you don't like yourself? If a salesman tries to sell you a car, if the salesman doesn't even believe its a good car, how do you have any chance of thinking its a good car? People are weak, hopeless. They aren't superior to you. They need your help. You need to show them that you love yourself, and set them an example to do the same (both to love you and themselves).

Have to take responsibility and stop relying on others. You might be weird, strange, hopeless, idiotic, whatever you believe you are. You need to be the one to change those beliefs about yourself. No one else will do it for you. As God take responsibility for YOUR creation. No one can help you (not because they don't love you, but because only you are the one inside your brain, they can't enter it, only you can). 

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You have to drop that criteria for people liking you which is "needing to contact you every day and take initiative" to be happy and like yourself. It doesn't work that way. Your needing something external, and by needing, or wanting something you don't have, you are sending a message to the universe and your higher self "I am lacking now". And all there ever is is "now". Rather you have to say "I am happy", "I like myself now" and then you will receive true happiness. Needing nothing attracts everything. 


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

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Of course everyone would say "like yourself and everything will be good".

I can try..................................................

Edited by Mikael89

"A hundred scriptures may declare that fire is cold or that it is dark; still they possess no authority in the matter."

- Adi Shankara

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Why you want them to like you? So they can disapoint you, get mad at you, and die on you like Leo says on his video Lifestyle minimalism.

I really feel like we are on the same boat here Mike, you and me.

Eff em Mike. My grand mother has a motto: -''Whoever does not want me is doing me a favor''

Yesterday I got stood up by an ugly girl, she made me a favor, and saved me some $$.

 

Arc

 

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