No love, why?

[Mindfang413]

I know ive had similar posts already. I just keep getting to new lows and i just cant seem to get out of it. I have found that after contemplating and meditating so long on purpose and love and everything positive, my depressive and nihilistic thoughts resurface even worse. In fact, its gotten to the point where i dont even see the point to love or joy. I have no love for love. Like its not just the thoughts, i have a complete lack of feeling. Thus, i have no love for anything. I just sit here, waiting to no longer exist. The good and the bad mean nothing to me. Am i just burnt out? I get veeeery small glimmers of love here and there that i guess is why im still here besides i guess trying to avoid pain by taking care of my basic needs. Sometimes, it seems that love is enough and should be enough, other times i think even if im just a thing that can feel, whats even the point to that? I avoid pain but at the same time, i dont see the value in pleasure anymore. I try practicing self love but i am finding it increasingly difficult as time goes on. When i think about absolute unconditional love, it still feels as if its not enough or insignificant, is it just cause im not FEELING it? Can you even feel that? I always feel like i NEED and SHOULD feel love but i just dont anymore. Its like a COMPLETE indifference to everything. Hate is not the opposite to love, indifference is and honestly, it is the hardest thing ive ever had to deal with, dont even know if i can recover. I dont even know if posting this will help,  maybe it will? I just dont know what to do anymore. I feel nothing but also dont care to feel anything?

[Gili Trawangan]

36 minutes ago, Mindfang413 said:

Can you even feel that? I always feel like i NEED and SHOULD feel love but i just dont anymore.

Here is the problem. If I were you I would replace the word love with acceptance. The word love seems to have you confused. Just accept whatever it is that you're feeling, or not feeling. Acceptance, acceptance, acceptance. Not just of yourself, but of everything that is happening around you.

Your feelings may change after a while if you do this. But here's the kicker, don't use acceptance as some bridge to get to love or whatever concept you're holding. You have to REALLY accept what's going on, with no ulterior motive. There's no goal but to accept what is already.

[Mindfang413]

3 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

don't use acceptance as some bridge to get to love or whatever concept you're holding. You have to REALLY accept what's going on, with no ulterior motive.

Yeah, this. I understand and agree with you. I will try to really accept things.

Thanks for helping to clear up my confusion.

[Leo Gura]

Unconditional Love definitely has a feeling to it, too.

You're simply missing a mystical experience of Love. Try contemplating what love is on a psychedelic. You're disconnected from Being, and thinking about love in the abstract is not going to be enough to reconnect you. You need a direct experience to jolt you awake.

You might also want to optimize your brain health, mental health, nutrition, energy, etc. to make sure that some chemical imbalance or energetic block is not obstructing you. Get blood work done. Check for vitamin deficiencies, heavy metal toxicity, etc. Dial in your health because it is the foundation for everything else.

For example, if you have too much lead or mercury in your brain, you may not be able to feel love the way you otherwise could.

If you can't feel anything, that shows me some deeper underlying chemical or health issue. Or possibly some energetic blockage. That is not normal. Start researching your symptoms.

[purerogue]

Not saying that Leo is wrong about possible causes, but guy on the top is right, it is about acceptance, if there is no acceptance,connection ,or there is no action in trying to have positive vibe you will have such state. Other option is putting your awareness on your sense of sight,smell, taste and so on, feel everything around you  with your senses. 

That is just what will fix it, is it right for you , or no , is for you to decide. 

 

 

Edited January 20, 2020 by purerogue

[Mindfang413]

16 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Unconditional Love definitely has a feeling to it, too.

You're simply missing a mystical experience of Love. Try contemplating what love is on a psychedelic. You're disconnected from Being, and thinking about love in the abstract is not going to be enough to reconnect you. You need a direct experience to jolt you awake.

You might also want to optimize your brain health, mental health, nutrition, energy, etc. to make sure that some chemical imbalance or energetic block is not obstructing you. Get blood work done. Check for vitamin deficiencies, heavy metal toxicity, etc. Dial in your health because it is the foundation for everything else.

For example, if you have too much lead or mercury in your brain, you may not be able to feel love the way you otherwise could.

If you can't feel anything, that shows me some deeper underlying chemical or health issue. Or possibly some energetic blockage. That is not normal. Start researching your symptoms.

That makes sense, thank you. Ill probably get some tests done too.

[The1One]

You seem like a candidate to try mushrooms. Start with 2g and contemplation. 

1. Be more present in the moment

2. Give GRATITUDE for 2 minutes each day when you wake up. This can be as simple as having air to breathe or a bed to sleep on

[Mindfang413]

7 hours ago, The1One said:

You seem like a candidate to try mushrooms. Start with 2g and contemplation. 

1. Be more present in the moment

2. Give GRATITUDE for 2 minutes each day when you wake up. This can be as simple as having air to breathe or a bed to sleep on

Interesting. Ill give gratitude a try. I might try mushrooms at some point

[Mindfang413]

Thank you all for the advice. Ill update if it improves. I think i may already feel a bit better in fact. Tried some acceptance meditation, helped a bit.

[SgtPepper]

Make sure you are taking vitamin D!

 

[Spaceofawareness]

Not feeling anymore to me is an emotional disconnection or detachment, which is actually a recognised disorder. I actually recognised I have mild symptoms of emotional detachment, which is probably a symptom of a more underlying issue, e,g, depression.

I actually was able to reconnect at least temporarily, listening to music which opened a back door to this blockage of emotion. Maybe you could try this. The way it happened for me was, I realised I had this emotional detachment issue, and listening to a certain song which typically I find very deep and taps into something deep inside me, I was listening all alone, and therefore became more open to the music, not predicting the music, but feeling it, letting it in, and like a flood of emotion came out, tears, of joy actually.

im not saying it will work for you, but it worked for me, and following that I had an awakening as well.

[ivankiss]

You are being shown what needs to be healed.

You already said "yes" to love. Your job now is to love (accept) everything that arises. It will seem counterintuitive and challenging, but all you must really do is allow and hold space. Don't resist. It's all love dressed up as something other than love. Let it all be.

That is how you transform. 

[Visionary]

To "solve", to "heal", to "accept" only shows what must be done to overcome it.

You're not here to overcome anything. But to respect and feel a part that screams for it. Own that shit. Don't play politics.