Removing Should-statements And Eventually Reaching Enlightenment

[JKG]

Only my Perception exists

This morning I had a 1.5h neti neti session. I again got a relatively good sense that I am not there and that there is only perception. I negated my body feelings, other feelings and identity. I was left with the sense of I-am.

I tried some of the exercises from Leo's list. A few days ago I did the first exercise where you draw an imaginary line from an object to "you." This became pretty quickly pretty deep, I didn't had this problem of monkey mind. What I firstly noticed that I always start to move my finger towards my body. But why? My finger stopped mainly in the area of my eye, at my forehead, at the area of the third eye or at my throat. I noticed that these all were just perceptions. Somewhere I read from Leo that perceptions cannot perceive another perception. Therefore this sense of ego cannot be the perceiver of the perceptions. If you think about it it seems so obvious.

When I draw the line towards my head area it feels good. If I try drawing the line towards other parts of my body like my knee it feels weird or not real. If I draw the line towards another object (my dried pineapples to my couch) it seems absurd.

I also tried the exercise with questioning the separation between me and objects and seeing them as connected, in a unified field. That is cool and beautiful. There is nothing between the wall and me. There is no space between us. I am the wall or the perception of the wall.

Today in chemistry class I went to the toilet. Coming back and walking through the empty corridors I spontaneously questioned "Is my class really still there? I don't perceive them. Only my perception exists. I don't see my class, the people from my class, the chemistry room... Here is this unified field of perception." Then sitting in class again I was pretty happy. I observed my teacher and the other students. They were me. I am them. Everything is one. Everything is me.

I enjoyed the end of the class with this perspective. It was funny. I had to smile most of the time. What I was doing here was absurd.

This was not a real profound experience, just a little shift in perspective triggered by the neti neti meditation, doing the exercises form Leo and watching Martin Ball talking about God.

[Gabriel Antonio]

@quantum

I never did self-inquiry. #ShameOnMe

[JKG]

A School Day - 1

For quite a while I had the idea to write a post about some regular days in school. So in the future when I have finished high school I could look back on these memories and see what has changed.

I woke up at 5:30am, stayed in bed for like 20 more minutes (a bad habit at the time), them motivated myself to get into the cold shower (100% commitment from yesterday evening), started meditating for 30 minutes and then changed it to 30 more minutes of visualization. Then I had to prepare food for school, turned on the computer to look for news (school homepage, YouTube, forum, weather), packed my back and went to school at 7:45am.

The first two classes were German (8:05-9:40). My German teacher was ill, so our school director (Mrs. B) substituted her. I like Mrs B's kind of teaching much more. We read a text about how children learn language and analyzed the text together. In these two lessons with her I learned much more than in 10 normal German classes. I participated well. Then we had an discussion about our opinion about the positions. In that part I didn't participate because I hate discussions. At the end we made a "scientific" experiment. One half of the class went outside and our director told us a story about her old sick mother. The other half of the class got told a story about young, dynamic students. We walked slower than the other group inside. We proved this theory...

In the third and fourth period I had English class (10:00-11:35). In groups we made a poster about the characters in Romeo&Juliet. I liked it and I brought up most of the content on our poster. While talking about the plot and other features of the play I participated really well, I guess I participated the most. I felt confident and liked it.

In the second break my friend told another friend that she might have a vitamin K deficiency. The reaction of the friend (narrow-minded) was in a way funny and to be expected. "No no, I don't have a deficiency. I always get blue marks. That's just the way I am..." Why don't they question and are willing to investigate??? Fantasy books and series are much more important than research about a good life!!!

In the fifth and sixth period I had physics class (11:50-01:25). Firstly the teacher spoke about organization stuff. Then we watched a lecture about the specific theory of relativity. I understood most of it. I was astonished about how radically different this perspective is. Einstein had to really think outside the box. Ordinary people would never think this way or question their normal way of thinking. Even though we sometimes in school talk about very interesting and different topics those people stay with their current paradigm and forget the topic as they go home and watch Game of Thrones.
In the second half of the class I had to present my paper which I had to prepare the last two day about electromagnetic induction. I hoped that I wouldn't have to present it today... But I anticipated it. I wasn't prepared to present but it went very well. I felt confident and was able to explain it properly. The teacher like it.

In the lunch break I was in the sitting are with my friends and other stupid people. I ate my oat meal (I felt physically bad afterwards) and talked to my friend to prepare the upcoming trip on the weekend. The other people talked about their trip to Auschwitz, the Holocaust, car crashes, disgusting things, series, their sleep pattern...... I would have felt better if I would have taken a walk outside in the cold. 

Then in the eighth and ninth period (04:25-03:55) I had history class. We talked about the resistance in the military against the Nazi regime. We watched a documentary about one guy or a number of people who organized a conspiracy and wanted to kill Hitler. But what they wanted afterwards was it to build up an undemocratic, restaurateur, aristocratic state again like at the time of Bismark.

Then I rushed home, ate for an hour and now write this post. I feel like I have too many things to do especially because I am away over the weekend and have no time then to make homeworks or do other productive stuff. I feel hectic and want to calm my mind own. Well, to be accurate, there is nothing that I need to do. 

[JKG]

I like how the artist expresses them freely. This smile and joy. I guess the doesn't care about the opinions of other people his age - he is just 2.5 months older than me, so I know this age group. A creator.

[JKG]

Honesty

Since reading Radical Honesty - well, already prior to that - I had stuff that I didn't write here just because it is to embarrassing. I always thought that I should write it here to be really radically honest. I know here no one personal (almost) and this quantum could be anybody outside in the world. But still, I am repressing it. 

Now that I am writing a summary about Radical Honesty, I feel like I have to write about some of the stuff here. I will do it now!

 

Forum Reputation

In the early days of the forum I sometimes got some reputation points. This notification bell of getting reputation by someone was really cool and at some point the ego was really attached to it. I somehow was disappointed when I wrote a time consuming post which I liked and I got no reputation the next day. On the other hand when I got more reputation or general notifications I found it so cool that other people liked the stuff that I like. I remember that in September or October this got really bad.

At some point I discovered that I could turn out this notification bell and change for what stuff I get a notification. This made it better a bit. Now I just get notifications when I get quoted or mentioned somewhere or when someone replies on this journal. But in secret I once in a while look at how much reputation I have under my name, who gave me the reputation and  how much posts I already have.

When I got these three points over my profile picture I felt very cool, superior or experienced. Then when I got four points - "whow, I am an expert!!" And eventually when I will get fife points I will be a master!!!!! I will be soo cool. And my reputation status is "Unbelievable!"

And what I also look at is the ratio between my reputation and posts. For each post I get more than one reputation - 465 likes / 441 posts = 1.05 likes/post. My ego doesn't want this ratio get below one. And when I see other members who are much more active but have a lower ratio I feel cool.

 

Thinking about what cool stuff to write here

When I do something or have a little insight my monkey mind thinks about what I could write here, how to formulate it, bla bla bla. If I have the time to, I immediately turn on my computer and write about it. Afterwards it often feels not as good as I imagine. But if I wait for a bit I feel like what I thought about isn't relevant at all.

Somewhen I November or December I didn't wrote much because of that, but only once a week. I didn't want to look like some fool who writes every little detail down.

 

Comments on my posts

When I get some encouraging posts, compliments, advice or other kinds of comments I feel also cool. People are actually reading the shit I write and find it valuable!

 

Changing my profile picture and name

I thought about this a while ago. I would kind of change my identity on the forum and would not get too attached to the idea of the superior quantum. Quantum is actually just a name I came up with while studying a bit of physics and astronomy. It sounded cool but have never used it before.

The first profile picture I had was just a picture I quickly found on a google picture search. And the current one I found on a album cover of a band which seemed to make spiritual music. And I liked the image because of the lack of a face/identity.

Maybe I will change it soon to something totally meaningless and uncool just to get rid of this self-image of my account in my mind.

 

Feeling attacked

I easily feel attacked when someone disagrees with my opinion and gives arguments which I cannot directly disprove. I liked my new "perspective-less perspective" because therefore I didn't had to disprove any arguments.

 

Writing style

I recognized that in my writing style in English I use often words like really, quite, even, definitively, very or totally. I find these words cool but they are so generalizing or exaggerated. I use them so often that they have no real meaning anymore. I want to change that. I don't know if this change is useful or necessary but I will become more mindful about my use of certain words.

I also noticed that I use often "but" and too many commas. In German we use more often commas to separate parts of sentences from each other. I like them and therefore use them more often in English although it is not grammatically right to use them so often. In school we learned the rule of thumb that if one isn't certain about whether to use a comma or not one shouldn't.

 

Posting songs

Sometimes I post here songs although I don't listen to them that much or have just discovered them only because I think their lyrics is sophisticated. But often I don't even listen to the lyrics...

 

I know that there is more stuff to tell about this topic. Some stuff doesn't come to my mind right now and some I still repress because it is still too embarrassing. Well, maybe in the future.

[JKG]

Digestion, Poop, Farting, Burping

(If you don't like to know the details, don't continue reading!)

I never had a smooth digestion. When I still had a normal diet, the consistency of my poop was always relatively hard. But now with the mostly vegan diet the consistency changes often. For a few days I have a very soft poop reminds me a bit of diarrhea. It comes out very quickly and the pieces are rather small. Sometimes the poop has  a good consistency, it has a normal form and I am ready in 1 minute. Other times it takes longer and I have to press a bit.
But almost everytime it does not smell "pleasant." Well, poop normally does not smell pleasant but the poop of healthy vegans should not stink that much. My family always complains about the smell of my poop afterwards.
The color changes also with what I eat. If I eat a lot of greens, it is rather green. If I eat beet root, it becomes rather violet-brown. And when I eat none of these things it is lighter brown.

I also fart quite often, more often than normal people I guess. And my family also complains about that a lot. My farts stink more than anybody else's. It is expectable when I have eaten many beens the day before. But it is not normal to fart that often.

And two weeks ago I started to burp more. It seems like farting is not enough anymore to get rid of the gas which gets produced in my digestive system. Before the day when it started I was eating very randomly and the combination of my meals was not optimal at all. The next day I was burping very often - but quietly. It seemed like the smell of those burps is not pleasant at all. My family complained about that it would smell like fish... I am happy that it is not that much anymore, but still I have to burp once in a while.

I know that I have this problem with my digestion. I guess it is because of my food combination. I try to improve that once in a while but it does not work out yet. Everytime when I have eaten with a bad food combination I will recognize it the next morning. I will have this taste/smell of having eaten boiled eggs and that something has rotten inside of my stomach...

This is embarrassing. I know nobody else of having such problems.

[Gabriel Antonio]

1- I am astonished by our similarities. I just read your last entries. There is a deep notion that what we're doing at times is actually feeding each others ego's and not actually encouraging us. This reputation thingy is really annoying and addictive. We should aim at getting hate comments instead of likes.

2- I can clearly see how you're just fooling yourself in this discussion thing.

You should (no fucking excuses!)  completely and absolutely force yourself to participate in the class discussions. Your ego is rationalizing your fear. Get uncomfortable! Be wrong! Make mistakes! The thing I regret the most in high school was how quiet I was in class discussions. If you really want to influence anyone, you will have to build your tolerance muscle. Express unpopular opinions! Baby step your way into that. But you have got to take action.

3- You are very unlucky with all these digestion problems. When I stopped ingesting diary, my digestion got really smooth. It used to suck balls. I used to fart a lot also, and now I barely fart.

If you press your poop, it means it is not ready. Magnesium chloride does wonders for constipation!

4- Don't give a fuck about your writing style. Use as many words as you can. Use as many cliches as you can. You will outgrow them within time. As you long as you keep fucking writing DAILY and don't psych yourself out due to your stupid perfectionism.

5- Congratulations on your cold shower commitment. I am a pro at that (been doing it for years). Also, no time for "being kind to yourself" when you're being a lazy-ass twat in bed. JUMP OUT OF BED! No time for pussyness. Time to get into Radical Action! Best mantra to get into radical action: "KEEP MOVING YOUR BUTT". Do not confuse self-love with laziness.

That's enough for today.

[Dragallur]

6 hours ago, Gabriel Antonio said:

2- I can clearly see how you're just fooling yourself in this discussion thing.

You should (no fucking excuses!)  completely and absolutely force yourself to participate in the class discussions. Your ego is rationalizing your fear. Get uncomfortable! Be wrong! Make mistakes! The thing I regret the most in high school was how quiet I was in class discussions. If you really want to influence anyone, you will have to build your tolerance muscle. Express unpopular opinions! Baby step your way into that. But you have got to take action.

@quantum ...

@Gabriel Antonio is making a great point here. If you leave your stance to only yourself you wont have so many opportunities to upgrade it. Even no stance is stance as you mentioned. When you talk with somebody else about your perspective he/she might find something that you did not consider before because of your particular viewpoint. It also helps to get your opinion ripped to pieces since then you see how arbitrary it was and you learn to endure constructive criticism.

[JKG]

@Gabriel Antonio @Dragallur

Now that you mentioned it, it seems obvious that I am fooling myself with this perspective. Having an opinion with radical open-mindedness would probably be better.

I will participate in the next discussion in class even though I am not interested in the topic. Maybe I will just make something up just to get uncomfortable

18 hours ago, Gabriel Antonio said:

5- Congratulations on your cold shower commitment. I am a pro at that (been doing it for years). Also, no time for "being kind to yourself" when you're being a lazy-ass twat in bed. JUMP OUT OF BED! No time for pussyness. Time to get into Radical Action! Best mantra to get into radical action: "KEEP MOVING YOUR BUTT". Do not confuse self-love with laziness.

Actually I will only start the commitment in 10 days. (I thought about not writing this just to "not hurt you" because you was wrong with your assumption. )

That is good advice. I will remember this tomorrow morning.

18 hours ago, Gabriel Antonio said:

4- Don't give a fuck about your writing style. Use as many words as you can. Use as many cliches as you can. You will outgrow them within time. As you long as you keep fucking writing DAILY and don't psych yourself out due to your stupid perfectionism.

Right! I just didn't wanted to be seen as someone with a "bad" writing style. Obvious. Really obvious!

[JKG]

So let me bust up a riddim with some harmony
I wanna tell you what I'm feeling but I can't you see
The world is in trouble why can't we be
A better example of humanity
I'm always wondering what if the world I'm in
Is another simulation of my soul within
Feel like I'm frozen in, the walls are closing in
I need to meditate inna me garden
See when I was a youth I used to dance and sing
Brainwashed from all the media and marketing
Trying to get love for all my brass and bling
All I ever really wanted was to just fit in
But now I'm zoning in, I'm really honing in
I elevate my mind and my soul within
My deadly joker grin is bouncing off my chin
Cause my mission is to spread the one loving

When I look you up on Twitter and InstaGram
All I ever get to see is all the glitz and glam
But in the chatroom you're getting all aggressive man
Stop pushing me around I'm not inside your pram
I'm suicidal man, need some vitamins
I'm drinking milk and honey with some cardamon
I'm always gardening, I'm Groove Armadaring
But I'm a-murdering the groove I'm superstyling
Cause my consciousness is in the atmosphere
While my 3D body sings inside your ear
Making you swing left and right like a chandelier
Beaming your chest with light till your mind is clear
I'm always fighting fear I want your mind to hear
The conscious soul that we bring my dear
So let me slide in here, raise the vibes in here
I could never let the room go silent

I like this song. I feel cool when I move with the beats on my own in my room. I feel cool when I understand the lyrics and the meaning behind it. I feel cool that I don't listen to stupid pop music but to conscious stuff.
 

[JKG]

Gap Year, Crying, Truth, Intuition

Something relevant happened yesterday. My father came into my room and asked me if I have decided what I wanted to study. I was committed towards telling him about my thoughts on the gap year when I he asked it me the next time. So I told him...

He was kind of shocked. He was scared that this could happen.

He came up with all sorts of reasons why it is a bad idea

• I will get problems with the assurances
• a year traveling will look bad on the CV
• I might not like working on an organic farm
• I might get exploited
• I am not independent just because I am 18 and done with school
• I am unsaved

I don't know if his arguments are reasonable but they persuaded me after thinking about them for a day.

I tried to give him my arguments that I had prepared. This attempt was not very successful because I began to cry. I easily get emotional and in the past I began to cry because of very insignificant reasons. So I tried to explain to him that I don't like the imagination of staying here at home, stuck, for the next 5 years. I don't know how much of this he understood because of me crying. Maybe he understood me wrong.

He came up with all sorts of solutions for me. I guess he understood that I don't like studying because I will have very little time for something else and might miss life. He came up with stuff that I could do in the time between finishing school and starting university and new hobbies.

I now know that he has a very untrue image of myself. He things that I am taking all this too seriously (reading books, listening to my "gurus"...) and don't want to have fun. He gave the example of a party which was organized by my year. Everybody from school was there except for me and a few other people. Or I don't have normal hobbies.
These assumptions of him are obviously not true. I am probably much more happy/fulfilled than everybody else in school. Going to parties and getting into new hobbies will not make me happier. And it is good to do personal development and read books. But he does not understand it. 
I understand why he sees me this way. I always look unhappy. I don't know why but I have always appeared to other people as sad, depressed, unhappy... When I have a neutral facial expression other people interpret it as sad... I also don't meet friends often or go away.

I also have a distorted image of my father. He claims that he is very happy with his position. He has a very good position at work, earns a lot of money, likes his work and his colleagues. He said that this is the best position he could end up in. For him it is normal that work can be stressful and not pleasant at times. But therefore he has hobbies at home like building electronic stuff and programming. 
Just I see most of the time a stressed, angry and unhappy person coming home late from work radiating negativity.

My parents admitted to me that they love me and only want the best for me.

Well, it felt relieving to cry the whole evening. This morning while running tears came up again and made it hard to breath. It feels refreshing to have told them my idea about the gap year. I don't have to hide this anymore. I had this feeling for the whole day now.

Did he change my mind? Yes. I will go to university and study for 5 years. He already asked and I told it to him.

Maybe even my intuition tells it me now. I don't know. Right now it is hard to distinguish the voice of my ego and intuition.

After school I partly relistened to the "Strategic Motherfucker" video and applied it. I still want to reach Enlightenment/sagehood/raising the quality of my consciousness and life purpose. But I guess I wanted to make a too big step from here to there. But this is very scary, even just the thought of it like I have seen in the past. Maybe taking multiple smaller steps towards my ultimate strategic intent would be better like getting a degree, building good habits, getting life experience, financial independence, working on my life purpose... I still have to deal with the lower levels of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Even Leo did not go from high school directly do actualized.org.

I can learn the rather basic personal development material while going through university. I need to develop good habits, work ethic, deep work, communication skills, getting out of my comfort zone, life experience, applying wisdom... I can come to peace with the idea of going to university.

Maybe the idea of the gap year was there just to let me come to this realization.

[Dragallur]

@quantum I wish you best I bet that you will use the time in University well too!

[JKG]

Pondering about Life Purpose

 

[askdfjnak]

@quantum You know, you could do an exchange while you are at university. Check to see if yours has any study abroad or exchange programs. Most universities have study abroad programs with universities in other countries that swap students. You can go in 2nd or 3rd year I think. Then you could travel while you study!

You can say to your parents:
 

 

Edited February 3, 2017 by Marc Schinkel

[JKG]

Zone of Genius

I think I now got what my Zone of Genius actually is:

Finding ways to solve mathematical/technical  (or general) problems.

I like it to have a rather accurate phrase like that.

 

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

I always knew that I was lacking in some of these areas. It never was a big problem to still work on self-actualization or self-transcendence because I was living at home and didn't had to worry about some lower needs. But soon these needs will come up more because of finishing school, turning 18...

Lower areas in which I lack in:

• employment
• relationships
• confidence / self-esteem

I want to solve those problems/needs permanently. I want to be able to work on self-actualization and self-transcendence without worrying about other stuff. Therefore I need to fill those gaps to make the pyramid more stable.

Filling those gaps should become a priority rather than the higher stages. I want to get through the lower stages as quick as possible and then work on Enlightenment stuff for a few years focused and become enlightened.

Employment

I don't just want employment. I want financial independence and security. I want to earn money with my life purpose. I want to build a business.

Firstly I need to get my degrees and if possible in the meantime start building my business. After university I might work for a company for a bit but eventually quit that and just work on my business full time.

But for now I should concentrate on studying for my final exam and practicing working hard.

Relationships

At the moment it is alright because I am going to school and have social contact there. But in the past in the holidays I was pretty isolated and had not many contacts. I was just around my family and rarely met other people. At the end of the holidays I got often a bad mood because of this isolation.

When I am done with school in a few months this might become a real problem. I have one really good friendship but I guess after school we will not see each other very often.

Somehow I need to get into contact with other people. I need to learn to have deeper conversations with other people (and not just with my best friend). I need to be able to approach to others.

Confidence / Self-Esteem

My confidence was really bad in my early teens. I was very quiet, didn't talk much at all, was very shy... It became a lot better with the years. In certain situations I feel very confident but when I am surrounded by people I don't know or like I get shy and quiet again. If someone would say something mean to me, my ego would get very attacked.

This correlates with relationships well. I "just" need to get out of my comfort zone.

 

This will be stuff that I will work on at university - rather basic personal development stuff. But still I will meditate and work out everyday. Reading is still important and working on my habits. Priorities are key.

 

Meditation

Normally I meditate once in the morning and another time in the afternoon or in the evening. Both sessions take around one hour. But this is very inefficient. The first 30 minutes of a meditation session I normally spend doing nothing to quiet the mind. Only little time is spend on self-inquiry. One longer, 2 hour, session would be much better. I could get much deeper.

That will be something I will try out in the next days. In the morning I will "just" do visualization to start the day.

[JKG]

Perception

Is there a perceiver? An object which perceives other objects and turns it into perception?

Is there an object that "sees" and brings me my vision? Is seems like my eyes perceive, but what are my eyes? I can feel the eyes, but they don't see.

Is there an object that "feels?" No. It seems like something in my head feels but that are also just feelings.

Is there an object that "hears?" No. It seems like the ears hear but that is just a feeling.

A perception cannot perceive another perception.

Is there an object that "hears" the internal sounds or thoughts? No.

Where do these perceptions arise from? I don't know.

Is there something controlling my thoughts? No. So I don't have free will.

Everything just happens.

[JKG]

Life Purpose Vision

Yesterday morning while visualizing my subconscious mind came up with a grandiose idea/vision for my life purpose! I want to build a program/software with analyses (all of) human knowledge and psyches of the people. It compares these two webs of beliefs with each other and gives advice to the user about how to grow. The program will analyze the belief systems through analyzing the language which the user uses (like texts out of journals or spoken language), books, videos, films...

This feels so authentic. With my previous visions there have always been some problems and things I didn't like. But here everything is combined: My Zone of Genius (solving problems and analyzing structures), Impact Statement (helping humanity to grow into higher stages of consciousness), Strength (logical thinking, love of learning)...

This means that computer science as a major would be better than electrical engineering. And I should master a programming language or something like artificial intelligence. I am excited for that, although this vision is scary.

 

Books

I have finished Radical Honesty and created a big mind map with a software. I just have to look that I don't forget about this problem of dishonesty. I should revise the mind map once in a while, like once a week. Then I can also improve the mind map because I am not so happy about the layout which the software created.

Then I started reading "Mastery" by George Leonard - a book that Leo recommends very often. It is pretty short and I am almost ready with it. I took notes and will also create a mind map for this one. I have only 40 pages left, so I will be ready in a few days.

I also have started reading another book in school today. Yesterday I got my last christmas presents - two books: "Our Inner Ape" by Frans de Waal and "The Happiness Hypothesis" by Jonathan Haidt. Our Inner Ape already seems funny and interesting.

Aaaand a few days ago I got "The 150 Healthiest Books On Earth" by Jonny Bowden. My friend somehow ordered two of them, so I got one. It is a used one and I am not used to own used books. It seemed like it once was owned by a Library. It has a lot of use marks. But I will deal with it.
In the book are also meat and diary products listed. There I see how much my mind doesn't like the idea of non-vegan foods being healthy. I was soo dogmatic about veganism in the past!

 

Meditation as a Practice

Through reading Mastery I remembered the idea of practice. It is about the journey, not the destination. Today in meditation I noticed that I was too focused on reaching an enjoyable/blissful state and making progress. But meditation should be a practice. It isn't important to get good results today. Just through staying on the path will bring results with time. It isn't just about Enlightenment.

 

Perception

But still today I had a "successful" meditation session. It was "only" 80 minutes long, but I relatively quickly got relatively concentrated and did self-inquiry. I also remembered the process of contemplation from Peter Ralston. I contemplated on vision for a bit. What is vision? Where does it come from? Vision is so strange. Like all of perception.

Today in maths class I laid my head down on the table and closed my eyes. I focused on sound and disidentified a bit from myself. It was strange to get up again at the end of the break.

 

School

I have started to study for my final exams. I will now revise everyday at least a little bit of chemistry of history. I got a lot of stuff done and feel good about it.

 

Progress

And I am generally satisfied with my progress at the moment. I am so happy about it that I have started to transform my habits at the beginning of last month! I finally see change. Homeostasis kicks in but through the journal and honesty I can get that handled.

In the last days I was really productive, read a lot, visualized, studied... On Friday and Saturday I got so much stuff done! I am most productive in the morning and noon.

Although I am not going though something "big" like the emotions at the beginning of the year or comfort zone challenges I see the progress. I am stabilizing at a higher level - mainly because of the habits!

Changing habits is so crucial! Why didn't I start doing this earlier??  

[Dragallur]

@quantum Wow, your plan for life purpose is really grandiouse, I would love to see something like that but it is something on whole another level, I wish you luck on this vision!

[Gabriel Antonio]

6 hours ago, quantum said:

Just through staying on the path will bring results with time.

Thanks for writing this.

I was thinking about meditation just now, and I was like, "Dude, that's so stupid. It is like I am talking to myself silently. What is the point of this?" But I keep forgetting to put things into perspective.

[JKG]

Character/Signature Strengths

I am currently working on my character strengths through the life purpose course and have also found another great website with excellent information! (http://www.viacharacter.org/www/Character-Strengths/VIA-Classification)

I have found that my strengths are only within the field of "Wisdom and Knowledge – Cognitive strengths that entail the acquisition and use of knowledge" and "Transcendence - Strengths that forge connections to the larger universe and provide meaning." Interesting.

Right now I cannot really decide. I have a list of them, but am not certain yet and have to cut some out.

Here is the list:

• curiosity and interest in the world
• hope, optimism, future-mindedness
• spirituality, sense of purpose, faith
• appreciation of beauty and excellence
• perspective wisdom
• judgment, critical thinking, open-mindedness
• creativity, ingenuity, originality