JKG

Removing Should-statements And Eventually Reaching Enlightenment

401 posts in this topic

17 hours ago, quantum said:

So you experienced earths curvature?

If you go to the beach and hold a long ruler up to the horizon and level the water onto the two ends you will see that the water bows a few millimeters above the middle of the ruler like this:

earth curvature.jpg

That's the closest I've come to experiencing the earth's curvature.

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3 hours ago, Marc Schinkel said:

If you go to the beach and hold a long ruler up to the horizon and level the water onto the two ends you will see that the water bows a few millimeters above the middle of the ruler like this:

I have personally tried it but maybe it was too foggy. I tried it with piece of wood (man made, straight as far as I know) but the problem was that my hand was shaking too much and I could not focus well both on the horizon and the rules. I will try it next time better, I came to the conclusion that it would be too small difference anyway.


When it rains, it pours like hell.
-Insomnium

My blog: dragallur.wordpress.com

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12 hours ago, Gabriel Antonio said:

@quantum you did a great job of externalizing your confusion. congratulations,good job!

I know. Thats what I like so much about journaling.

 

5 hours ago, Marc Schinkel said:

If you go to the beach and hold a long ruler up to the horizon and level the water onto the two ends you will see that the water bows a few millimeters above the middle of the ruler like this:

earth curvature.jpg

That's the closest I've come to experiencing the earth's curvature.

Take a look at weather balloons or other footage from high altitude which aren't taken by a fish eye lens or by NASA. Looks pretty flat, without curvature.

Such a test with a ruler could be rather subjective. Is the ruler really aligned with the horizon, isn't it shaking, don't you "imagine" these additional few millimeters in the middle just through the placebo effect?

Well, I don't know. I have not experienced earths flatness nor roundness. I have not done any of those tests and at the moment have not the possibility to do try it out for myself. Maybe the day will come.

 

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Low Energy

I am back from university again, and really low in energy again, like on those long school days where I have to stay in school until 4 or 6pm. When I study or work, I will probably everyday will come back home such late. Oh god, I don't want that at all.

After all those lectures, classes or hours of studying and working, all the energy is sucked out of my system. Then I just need to relax for a few hours through watching more or less useless videos and eating. And when I am done with that my digestive system needs all the energy to digest all of this food. Although I would have the time to work out, study, meditate, read ect I am not properly able to because of the low energy and tiredness. My stomach is so full of food, that it is very uncomfortable. I can understand all of those people who come back from school, university or work and just follow the path of least resistance - no sports, no further education, no consciousness work, just pure easy entertainment. I don't want that at all.

I wanted to go running after all this university stuff, but I didn't had the energy to do it. I could have easily, but my will power was so low. I just wanted to stay inside the warm house, eat and watch useless videos. I could meditate now, but I don't have the energy to concentrate on anything now. I could do school work, but I don't have the energy now.

For me, at the moment, the most important "tasks" in life are meditation/contemplation, working out/moving, research/study/education/reading and eventually creating. How could I possibly become happy or move forward in life when I don't have energy for that. I need energy, alertness, a clear and calm mind, silence & solitude, free time, nature, good nutrition. I need to build myself a life with these qualities. This is what makes a high quality lifestyle for me.

How to get more energy

  • Eating - Controlling my eating habit. I eat so much and it sucks so much of my energy. My body is digesting food all the time, so I am tired. I need to give my body time to regenerate, without food. Intermittent fasting is perfect for that, but in the last three or four days I didn't follow that, and so felt less energetic. I generally have to eat less, even in the 6 hour window in which I normally eat. I also need to eat more raw food like I also did in the last time. But in the last couple of days - again - I ate much more cooked food. I need to get back to that.
  • Detoxing my body. When I have handled my eating habit, I would like to do some fasting periods like eating nothing for one or two days on a regular basis. Maybe juice fasting, water fasting, or eating little food for a week. I need to get those toxins out of my body to clean my body and therefore get more energy. But thats is firstly just a plan for the future.
  • Spending time outside. In the last couple of days I was a lot inside, in warm but fuggy rooms. I want to spend my breaks in school or later at university mostly outside if thats possible. Clean air is important for a healthy body and energy.
  • Moving throughout the day. I don't want to sit around all day like I often have to in school and later at university. I want to combine that with fresh air. I could go for walks in parks or try to stand rather than sitting when I study. The lymphatic system which is responsible for cleaning up the blood and getting toxins out of the body or something like that, needs to get activated through movement.
    (I could stand now at my standing desk, but I have so low energy that I just want to sit stupidly around.
  • Exercise. If possible everyday, at least a little bit. Optimally outside with fresh air and now in the winter as a cold exposure. Letting blood get pumped through the system and stretching out this stiff body.
  • Cold showers. Every day.
  • Meditation. At least do nothing. Letting the monkey mind wander around until it has released all its repressed expressions.

(You see, as I went down this list, my energy got lower and lower. I have no motivation for writing much sophisticated stuff anymore. I just want to sleep, or watch YouTube videos)

Energy is like a vicious cycle. If you have low energy, you will most likely do things that will rob more energy from you. But if you get out of this cycle, it is more likely that you will make your body and mind more energetic. Now that I am in low energy and normally have higher energy levels, I value higher energy levels so much more. I need to get back to my usual high energy habits again. That is so important for my growth.

If I chose to study, I definitively need to handle my energy levels. But if I would take the gap year and do wwoofing, I would naturally have high energy levels, working outside, in nature, freely, with much free time.

"Intuition, I trust in you. You will guide me towards making the right choices at this time. The future will turn out great, if I just trust you and follow your advice. Thanks."

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1 hour ago, quantum said:

Well, I don't know. I have not experienced earths flatness nor roundness. I have not done any of those tests and at the moment have not the possibility to do try it out for myself. Maybe the day will come.

 

It does not make much sense to use fish lense to find out the Earths curvature.. but still, pause the video on 5:33 where horizon is clearly in the bottom half of the video where the fish lense should create bowl like shape, yet it is straight as you can check. I would say that this video proves that the Earth has curvature.

EDIT: it is quite hard to see and hard to tell when it should be bowl shape and when not, the horizon is kind of foggy so I would not take this as a good evidence anyway. ISS videos are way better though no direct experience -_-

Edited by Dragallur

When it rains, it pours like hell.
-Insomnium

My blog: dragallur.wordpress.com

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2 hours ago, Dragallur said:

It does not make much sense to use fish lense to find out the Earths curvature.. but still, pause the video on 5:33 where horizon is clearly in the bottom half of the video where the fish lense should create bowl like shape, yet it is straight as you can check. I would say that this video proves that the Earth has curvature.

EDIT: it is quite hard to see and hard to tell when it should be bowl shape and when not, the horizon is kind of foggy so I would not take this as a good evidence anyway. ISS videos are way better though no direct experience -_-

His proves my lack of research on this topic. You probably have done much more research and know probably better than I. I just watched some YouTube videos which seemed interesting. Their reasoning seemed logic as well as the idea of a global conspiracy that the "elite" wants to control us.

The ISS videos could be manipulated by NASA :P

Well, as already said: I don't know. I just don't want this journal to be about a flat earth debate.

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2 minutes ago, quantum said:

Well, as already said: I don't know. I just don't want this journal to be about a flat earth debate.

Yeah it is probably counter productive to just debate about this stuff when all of us here have much higher goals to reach!

I might also be secret NASA agent that spreads the "truth" :D


When it rains, it pours like hell.
-Insomnium

My blog: dragallur.wordpress.com

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13 hours ago, quantum said:

Such a test with a ruler could be rather subjective

It is,

and the subject is much more interesting to explore.

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Dealing with confusion about my future

I am just talking to myself about everything that goes on in my mind about university vs gap year. I am very confused. I am observing the fight between the ego and the intuition. I kind of coach myself. Pretty long, I repeat myself often and have longer breaks because I have to deal with my thoughts.

 

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Chemtrails

WhatsApp Image 2017-01-20 at 20.41.27.jpegWhatsApp Image 2017-01-20 at 20.41.27(1).jpegWhatsApp Image 2017-01-20 at 20.41.27(2).jpegWhatsApp Image 2017-01-20 at 20.41.27(3).jpegWhatsApp Image 2017-01-20 at 20.41.27(4).jpeg

I took these images this afternoon while walking home from school. These things aren't natural. These aren't normal clouds, never! In the past there weren't such things in the sky. In the past there already were air planes flying around. They didn't leave such trails behind them which spread and look like really weird clouds. Those "clouds" can never be just contrails.

I could see even those grids. The air planes are flying above the cities in a grid formation. Many angles were very regular and some even orthogonal. That cannot be a coincidence.

Today was a pretty clear day. If there wouldn't have been those "clouds", the sky would have been almost clear. But I saw the trails in the morning, at midday and in the afternoon, covering most of the sky. There has to be something true about the chemtrails conspiracy.

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More conspiracy theories - Illuminati, MK-Ultra Mind Control

I see how it becomes a habit of watching conspiracy theory videos while eating. It is fun and brings a new perspective. The world is definitively not as it seems to be. Some of those theories have to be true. 

The Illuminati seem interesting. And also MK-Ultra Mind Control. These celebrities are so brainwashed :D

These celebrities seem like a tool of the Illuminati. They serve the function of making the mainstream believe that such a fame-lifestyle is worthwhile and desirable. Maybe they want to program us with their music about sex, parties, love, fame, materialism, hedonism... Ordinary people listen to this pop music so often. Their subconscious mind just has to absorb these information and they get programmed. So obvious.

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A Guide Towards Radical Open-mindedness

(just an idea and how I subconsciously do it)

  • Discover a new topic that seems interesting to you, but which you are very skeptical about
    (e.g. the flat earth theory)
  • Do research about this topic. But turn of your skepticism for a while. Play the naive child and try to understand how these people think, understand their arguments, their point of view - but without questioning.
  • You will eventually notice that you can relate to those people very well.
  • Then start questioning the topic and compare your previous believes and arguments to your new gained perspective.
  • Don't become dogmatic about any of those perspectives. Remain open to the possibility that both perspectives could be true and that you could be just totally deluded. Don't cling to any of your believes. Because you can understand both sides.
  • Think about those perspectives just as possibilities. They could be true but also false. You don't know. How can you know? Add to them just possibilities - Perspective A could be 40% true and Perspective B 60%.
  • Enjoy your freedom of mind and that you don't have to defend your position against any other one because for you any position could turn out true.

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School

Yesterday we got our school certificates. These are the results:

  • Maths 14
  • Chemistry 13
  • History 13
  • English 13
  • Physics 14
  • Computer science 13
  • German 12
  • Sports 10
  • Social Science 13

I remembered that I have set myself some goals at the beginning of this school year.

On 23.8.2016 at 6:51 PM, quantum said:
  • Maths 13(14),13(14),13(14)
  • Chemistry 13,13,13
  • History 13,13,13
  • English 12(13),12(13),12
  • Physics 13,13
  • Computer science 13(14),13(14)
  • German 11(12),11(12)
  • Sports 10(11),10(11)
  • Social Sciences 11(13),11(13)

I was surprised that I met all of the goals and even reached some of the ambitious goals. Kind of cool. The best certificate that I ever got, although I didn't studied more at all.

All my grandparents said how proud they are, my mother, further family members... (but my father didn't even say a word about it). I dislike the idea of proudness. I got this notion from my Buddhist time. They say that proudness makes you feel superior to others - ego. That's what my whole family is about.
These grades are just an indication of how well you can adapt to the shitty system. Also a bit of intelligence or work ethic, but really, you just have to conform to the system. It does not make me a better human being.

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1 hour ago, quantum said:

I dislike the idea of proudness.

I think I know what you mean. I cringe every time somebody approves my work without any criticism.. for example on juggling AG I am learning apparently very fast and the teacher is saying it to everybody like 5 times every session -_- Have you seen the movie Whiplash? It is about drummer who joins jazz group that has very hard-core teacher and well here you go:

 


When it rains, it pours like hell.
-Insomnium

My blog: dragallur.wordpress.com

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19 hours ago, quantum said:

School

Yesterday we got our school certificates. These are the results:

  • Maths 14
  • Chemistry 13
  • History 13
  • English 13
  • Physics 14
  • Computer science 13
  • German 12
  • Sports 10
  • Social Science 13

I remembered that I have set myself some goals at the beginning of this school year.

I was surprised that I met all of the goals and even reached some of the ambitious goals. Kind of cool. The best certificate that I ever got, although I didn't studied more at all.

All my grandparents said how proud they are, my mother, further family members... (but my father didn't even say a word about it). I dislike the idea of proudness. I got this notion from my Buddhist time. They say that proudness makes you feel superior to others - ego. That's what my whole family is about.
These grades are just an indication of how well you can adapt to the shitty system. Also a bit of intelligence or work ethic, but really, you just have to conform to the system. It does not make me a better human being.

Nicely done dude. Inspiring.

Nothing wrong with pride - for some it is an important stepping stone for self love and growth. Pride raises people out of apathy. If you don't want to be proud, then transcend it and instead scale your perspective to see the beauty of what it is to set goals and meet them, and the majesty of mind, discipline, and all the factors that come together for these kinds of accomplishments. Gratitude not for what you've accomplished but for the life that you are a part of that allows accomplishment. 

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Meditation

I meditated for about 4 hours today. 30 minutes in the morning and the rest in "one" session in the afternoon. After my parents left I got the whole house on my own and therefore meditated for 75 minutes in the living room looking outside. Then I went into my room and listened to this "guided meditation." I wouldn't call it a guided meditation but it lead me to a nice state of love and less thoughts. At the time I finished it was already 5:30pm and my parents were back making noise.

I guess I know now what I need to "search" for in meditation/contemplation/self inquiry. And when I am concentrated enough I can reach a blissful state in about 2 hours. But the monkey mind is a big obstacle for me. It always distracts me in my contemplation attempts. It takes a lot of time to quiet the monkey mind down. That normally takes at least 1 hour of do nothing. So I reach this blissful state of disidentification with the ego rarely, maybe one every week or every second week.

 

Life Purpose

I have a few new ideas about my life purpose because of relistening to the LPC.

Zone of Genius: structuring and analyzing patterns?
( I guess I am pretty good at analyzing the psyche, believes, behaviors, dogmas, vows ect of people around me as well of myself. I can coach myself well if I am aware enough and can think of thousands of ways coaching others. The barrier is just communication and resistance.

Impact Statement: making people more conscious or specifically open-minded

Domain of Mastery: Human psychology, the mechanics of the mind, nature of self/reality/mind

Ideal Medium: speaking to people? developing software? recording videos? hypnosis? some kind of energy work? I have no idea

What am I doing when I am in the flow state? Solving mathematical problems, programming, learning (about personal development/spiritual stuff - almost everything that Leo talks about), studying and finally understanding a topic deeply in school (chemistry, history), reading, meditating / exploring my perception?

 

Confusion

What should I do now? I want to focus more again on meditation. I want to start mastering my domain of masters, read and research a lot and apply it to myself. I want to work thought the LPC properly again to get as much out of it as possible. I want to work on organizing my future. And I need to study for my final exam (I already started with chemistry and history. Chemistry is working well and I enjoy it. But history... I have to memorize so many facts. I just started with world war two and there are so many facts and dates. That seems to take months! Happily I still have some months.)

I would love to do them all. But that won't bring much results. I guess I should prioritize them:

  1. school
  2. organizing my future
  3. meditation
  4. life purpose course
  5. domain of mastery

I put meditation above the LPC because I have neglected meditation in the last month. It is rather enjoyable to work though the LPC because I puzzle while listening to it. I already know all the material, I just need to refresh it in my mind. And my mind has to come up with the answers. That might take time. But in the monkey mind phase of meditation I usually come up with good ideas about it. And additionally I build a habit of visualization. 

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Gap Year

Yesterday I felt more confident about the gap year again. Today too. After school I firstly wanted to continue reading, but then my mind remembered that organizing my future is more important now than reading. So I took out a pen and paper and wrote down why my intuition wants to do this gap year.

  • I want to get away from home, seeing more of the world and having distance from my family
  • I don't want to directly have to be in this stress/learning/obligation/work situation which would be if I go to university
  • I don't want to be around these similar, negative, narrow-minded people again
  • I want to meet people who are a little more open-minded and developed, with different mentalities than the ordinary people
  • I want to have time to meditate and research
  • I want to have time do find my life purpose and start working on it
  • I don't want to be in this rather dirty city environment
  • I don't want to sit all day around in closed rooms
  • I want to take part at retreats
  • I want to be in warmer regions with better fruits and vegetables
  • I want to live in an more natural environment
  • I want to eat different and less food

I noticed that I also came up with arguments which don't come from my intuition but from the mind.

Then I got the intuitive urge to tell it my mother. While cooking I approached to her and asked something like "what would you think if I don't directly go to university but travel for a year." Her response was rather positive. She anticipated something like that. She is aware about that she cannot hold me back as soon as I am 18. She as done much more stuff when she was at my age. And she didn't say something about concerns about my safety. She was rather interested in what I actually planned.

I feel optimistic now about this gap year. It is really possible. The stuff I fear might be just an imagination from my fearful ego.

This dream might become true!

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Great entry!

My favorites:

5 hours ago, quantum said:

I don't want to sit all day around in closed rooms

 

5 hours ago, quantum said:

I want to meet people who are a little more open-minded and developed, with different mentalities than the ordinary people

 

5 hours ago, quantum said:

I don't want to be around these similar, negative, narrow-minded people again

 

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A Rant Against School

I just had to do homework in the evening. I never have to do homework in the evening. The evenings are like my "holy time," in which I am free to do whatever I want - definitively no homework. I firstly had to read some useless papers for chemistry.

And then i had to do this fucking physic assignment. I had to prepare a paper for the other students to review a topic from last year with explanations and asks for them. I hated it. It is so easy and obvious to me. And I hate explaining easy things for stupid people. Why did our teacher give us such a useless homework. Those two people who have physics at their final exams will never look at these papers again. They will just watch better learning videos on YouTube about it.

I didn't find good explanations on the internet and had to search for so many sources to come up with this shitty paper. It took me two hours!!! I could do SOOOOO much more useful stuff. But no, teachers think they have to waste our time. I am so glad that this will be over soon.

I felt like I got aggressive, angry, pissed off... I wanted to be done with this fucking task. Sooo useless.

I had this same feeling for months when I had to write my project thesis last year. OOhhh, I hated it so much. And I hate these fucking stupid tasks. This school system is soooo stupid. Everything I learned in these 6 classes today I could have learned at home in 20 minutes, no 10 minutes would have been enough. This school system is pure inefficiency.

I had this feeling also soo often when I had to do stupid German class tasks like writing an analysis about a stupid scene out of a stupid book.

Only 10 weeks of classes left. I am glad.

I feel like I would get this feeling again when I would go to university. Oh no, I don't want that. I want to be free and do things that I am interested in. I never want to get suck in such useless education systems. If I will take the gap year I should find something that I will not "have to" go to university after that year.

 

Just a rant, I am just in rage for a bit. Don't take this too seriously.

I'll go meditating now. I am infinite. We are all one. Relax. Everything is meaningless. God.

But fuck you school!

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