Wyatt

Dealing with Flaky Women/Girls

16 posts in this topic

Looking to see whether I’m the only one experiencing this, and how to deal with it: I’m 22 years old and have gone on lots of dates throughout my life. But it wasn’t until college that I started to see just how FLAKY young girls are. It’s very common, happening almost 40% of the time, that I’ll be texting and communicating with a girl, she’ll be interested in going on a date, we’ll pick a specific date and time to meet at a restaurant or bar or wherever, we’ll confirm that we’ll be meeting eachother. I’ll go, but she won’t show up. They often Will ghost me completely after i start texting “where are you?” Or “are you on your way?” Let alone give me an explanation as to why they missed the date or didn’t show.

I try to be a person of my word, and I have the expectation that if someone says they’ll do something then they’ll follow through with it. Is there something wrong with me? Something in my way of planning? Or could it be that so many of these girls are too immature to realize that they were never really planning on showing up and/or too weak to really tell me that? Would be good to know, I’m getting somewhat frustrated and pessimistic about dating in general

Thanks for your thoughts!

Edited by Wyatt

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I think you are fine. B/w text or call them and make sure plan is on before you go out to place where you set up date and waiting for them, If they cant make it dont force be ok and set another date or move on with other plans.

Edited by Harikrishnan

I will be waiting here, For your silence to break, For your soul to shake,              For your love to wake! Rumi

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Check corey wayne on this he have good contents on it.


I will be waiting here, For your silence to break, For your soul to shake,              For your love to wake! Rumi

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They are too weak.

Women are goal centric 

 

 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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I find it often helps to be a little more spontaneous about it. I see it as, depending on the girl, they might decide against seeing you if they have time to think about the date, but if you catch them in a moment, when they're in the mood to go on a date, you might have better luck. 

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@Wyatt Women in their 20's are super flakey, especially if you're trying to convert from cold approach. Expect massive flakiness.

A good way to test for flakes on the day of the date is to text her 1hr before you get in your car: "Doing some chores and then will head out." If she doesn't respond, you know she's gonna flake.

If she's gonna go on a date with you, she needs to be responsive to texts.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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7 hours ago, Wyatt said:

Looking to see whether I’m the only one experiencing this, and how to deal with it: I’m 22 years old and have gone on lots of dates throughout my life. But it wasn’t until college that I started to see just how FLAKY young girls are. It’s very common, happening almost 40% of the time, that I’ll be texting and communicating with a girl, she’ll be interested in going on a date, we’ll pick a specific date and time to meet at a restaurant or bar or wherever, we’ll confirm that we’ll be meeting eachother. I’ll go, but she won’t show up. They often Will ghost me completely after i start texting “where are you?” Or “are you on your way?” Let alone give me an explanation as to why they missed the date or didn’t show.

I try to be a person of my word, and I have the expectation that if someone says they’ll do something then they’ll follow through with it. Is there something wrong with me? Something in my way of planning? Or could it be that so many of these girls are too immature to realize that they were never really planning on showing up and/or too weak to really tell me that? Would be good to know, I’m getting somewhat frustrated and pessimistic about dating in general

Thanks for your thoughts!

how long were you texting each other before? what was the conversation? what was your expectation? how much were you attentive about her? maybe just liking you and don`t want to disappoint you so still showing attention? or then missing the real interrest from your side? or then realizing it`s getting more serious. i`m not very familiar with ghosting in general, but i guess guys do it as well or at least they oftentimes do it after sexual intercourse - maybe there is some correlation - women use to chicken out before, guys after. although ghosting got probably worse, since fast sex apps. it spoils the food market in general.

in some sense it might be even that guys get back what other guys messed up because of their assholines. alpha... my ass, chiao.

Edited by remember
in some sense this whole topic therefore is about the r* words respect, rules and response

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@Wyatt It takes a lot of effort to get things going with a man. Understand that it's easier for them to blow you off when they don't know you and they sitting at home on their mums sofa chatting on the phone to a friend. They would rather have comfort than risk possible problems meeting with a new person. They know you want sex so that makes them even more unsure. 

The risk of upheaval outweighs the possible benefits. And with how men are in the 21st century, it's easy to write men off and not start anything with them at all. Women have a crystal ball and can see what you're like in the future just by looking at your texts. They are that sensitive, and if they think you're not with the effort to get up off the sofa then they won't meet you.

You got to build a relationship with them and you got to be someone who is worth the effort. If you have a pick up mentality then forget it. She isn't interested in those men. 

Edited by Nickyy

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Sounds fucking annoying to me. Maybe it has to do with your location or age.

Do you text with them before you meet, like on the same day?

 

What I always try to do is set the location fordates 3 minutes away from my home. Doesnt mean I never took a 30 minute drive somewhere else but Im just lazy.

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Don't internalize it as something being wrong with you. Just sounds like some immature girls. You can find women who follow through in their 20s even though they are more rare. The better rapport you two have before the date the less chance she should do that to you. Although here and there there could be a genuine reason for a girl flaking on you, like some legit circumstance came up for her, but most of the time that is not the case. Just dont let it discourage you, keep charging forward and you will get success. 


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

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make ghosting a coolness „no go“ for both sides! respect and response is a dubble bind - be honest about what you want and be honest about no matches. fast sex and relationship are not really a match.

Edited by remember

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They aren't worth dating if they can't respect someone's time or resources. So no real loss.. 

 

 

(if you treat shallow women like princesses, expect to get shit on by them.) 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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same goes for men though - see the problem in that thinking?
it’s all self feeding - starts by making it a no go in your own gender influence circle.
don’t treat her like a princess but don’t treat her like shit as she’s a queen.

it all comes back in a loop.

Edited by remember

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1 hour ago, remember said:

same goes for men though - see the problem in that thinking?
it’s all self feeding - starts by making it a no go in your own gender influence circle.
don’t treat her like a princess but don’t treat her like shit as she’s a queen.

it all comes back in a loop.

There was a minor difference. A small word that was missed out which can make a ginormous difference in context. 

And that word was "shallow" 

Treating an immature shallow woman like a princess is same as me treating a jerk as a prince. I shouldn't be surprised if I get shit on by him. 

Go after a golddigger. You get a golddigger. 

Go after a jerk. You get a jerk. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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yes, how to know if someone is a jerk? how to know if someone is shallow? how do you know if these women were shallow or if he was? he only knows that himself.

some women also get like that if they feel the guy doesn’t respond to their signs of wanting some distance. if guys overstep that without being jerks, women sometimes don’t feel like responding, as they miss response - so the only thing you really know about this situation is actually that ghosting happens. saying the women are shallow is an easy scapegoat out. (it also means though women need to learn to say if they are not interested much earlier - although that would mean being direct and sometimes hurting)

even if wyatt might be fair and square - a lot of people who read this might not be.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zrzMhU_4m-g

Edited by remember
sorry can’t quote can’t mention members and can‘t embed anything right now.

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