Aakash

Tales of the kid turning into a normal person

198 posts in this topic

hmm i wonder if i've been a rude person now asking all these questions. Now i acknowledge all of you as strangers. Before i took you in as a building block of myself all acting in one play of life story. 

i'm so sorry, i was probably acting like a dick, even against the guidelines trying to drive home my false points. That none of you were even accepting . now i just look stupid compared to all actual enlightened beings. 

i've probably said a lot of embarrassing things - _ - 

i never even posted formally  either and really this is only appropriate for a diary LOL 

# actuality... i'll move it there via copy and paste  

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The title of enlightened being sounds so prestigious from the perspective of the begginning of the path. 

I wonder if i'm actually happy starting from the bottom again. 

Its like starting from watching a couple of rupert spira videos, the confusion of the whole path by taking random gambles to get somewhere that can't be pointed to with the teachers help . Sounds okay as long as you pick a good teacher. 

I was just about to diss the people leading isha foundations as meditation teachers, but now i realise that i should probably listen to them aswell instead of bagging on them. Thats it they just want to teach meditation, i wonder, do people go to get enlightened or just learn to meditate. 

 

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If you cannot see where someone is coming from, best to stay silent and learn to forget all you ever attained to see what may reveal itself in a new light. 

Yup, just spit on your mirror ;) wiping it clean in the gleam of my own eyes ? 

youre an equal when it comes to Truth whether you see it or not ^_^ 

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You know, i was just thinking i was working together to solve the problem of the truth. 

i feel sad, because i have to bite the bullet. 

this is why i don't like god, always taking L's for going against the status quo and never have the experience to back it up. 

its like saying i'm going to be rich and not doing it because reality is so complex to plan out your life. 

have to regress all my words meanings to their original definitions. 

not absolute infinity ... god.  

 

 

 

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@DrewNows ahah i actually enjoy the spiritual path and truth seeking in general, every time i go backwards, its fine. This was part of the plan, but i never calculated how much direct experience would rob. See ? 

the assumption is that you would be right, unless proven otherwise. 

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Lol zeroisinfinity said  "as god i created you"  on the forum thread and it sounded funnily so arrogant for someone to say. 

i've hit back into material reality, need to cool off on this layer. To reset my reality back to base, where people start the path from.  This will probably take a few weeks. 

all its going to be is identifying what's in my direct experience and extracting all beliefs from the equations. i'm probably going to take the lazy route and say that its everything, there's no point sorting out the beliefs because it was just stringed together by an apparent "absolute truth"...  a made up absolute truth xD 

Edited by Aakash

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Pssst -_ - can't participate on the forum, because i have no truth to tell. :(  

no direct experience i think is true. 

guess i'm just all alone here talking to myself lol. 

how funny when i ask , i can't find the one who is aware in my direct experience xD

not that i didn't know what i was getting myself into, i was perfectly conscious of the hard problem that i was offering. 

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You have to be one hardcore motherfucker to proclaim an absolute truth that only you know LOL 

and still debate it against others lol, ofcourse it wasn't going to work, only you believed in it lol 

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This is so weird, i'm dispersing my authority all throughout my reality 

i'm saying all people absolutely know more than me, and so i need to have them in my life to give me a sense of grounding, because i can go to them to ask for advise and totally follow it. 

I guess this effect will especially be positive for my parents 

when they're telling me next that a topic about atoms, i can say yes you are 100% true and that's not an actuality to say no, because what ever i'm searching for in my direct experience is not there, we can share the belief together again , like before the spiritual path. i mean umm before i deluded myself  lol now is the spiritual path 

Edited by Aakash

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  Back to the roots,  material, material... feels like a long time since here 

round 2... come back to do what i said i would do. good opportunity

All survival for the next couple of years. 

will do meditation 45 minutes everyday,  if i manage. 

will make my brain time to adjust to reality lol 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Aakash

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Basically what i did was go through stage blue for 2 years, it was religion to myself but called it spirituality. We can phrase it like that

Now moving to orange, will do some orange things today instead of reading my own bhagvat gita lol the book of my conceptual mind. 

 

 

 

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When @whoareyou wrote the thread about channelling being incorrect

i couldn't resist the urge to find this chant and post it

but i realise now, i don't think this is meant to be an informal community, the logical conclusion is that everyone is just being themselves but i guess, there are some more formal people than others. Should just act professional all the time except on the journal. Honestly half my comments if they're not about the truth are just jokes, so like all i would be posting is jokes 

anyways this is what i was going to post but stopped because now i'm a seperate human being 

How funny is that lol 

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Become aware of what fragmentation is. Overly simply put - it’s found in the thinking, specifically thoughts about yourself - as if the one who is aware of the thought is one you, and the thought is about a second you. Just begin to notice this in your thinking, writing, etc. Notice it, realize you have never been “two”, and have a laugh every time. Allow your infinite nature, truth, to be the punchline to duality. There’s a natural release in finding it funny. Notice these Twoness-ess:

”I can discipline my self”.

 Everything is twoness, this or that - except for you. You are the awareness. Relative to physical-world-thinking, you are the Nothing. Notice, how this thinking you’ve been doing, about yourself, as if you were a thing, a this or that...notice how this thinking of yourself dualistically (twoness) keeps leading you into the back and forth - of this or that. This is because, again, you are awareness, aware of this or that. 

So, reconsider “discipline” from the true self perspective,of,  Nothing. This would be a different paradigm for your consideration - one where the “discipline” is not in doing, but in letting go. Spirit, is like a cork being held under water by holding thoughts about yourself. When you let the thoughts go, the cork of course, naturally floats. Inspiration is natural, organic, perfect alignment in actuality. The entire experience is ‘housed’ in purification. You let go, reality washes it from you. Please pause to notice the distinction here. Letting go is not an action you do, like other things. Purification is the fundamental nature of reality, 24/7. The “current” which “takes” what you release and let go of, is always running - so you - don’t have to. You, just let thoughts go, universe is already a system created around that, already designed in purification. 

“i face resistance towards whatever i’m doing.”

See the twoness here also. Resistance is just an arising thought, you choose or let go. That’s it. Resistance is not something separate, but rather, a micro phase in your creating. It’s like if a deep diver in going to the bottom of the ocean, he has a feed of oxygen. You are out here in infinity, creating reality - and your “feed” of creating from source, is the linear, one at a time - thoughts - from which to choose from, to create what you want. Pick a thought and roll with it if it feels good. If it doesn’t feel good, let it go. You will find, the “resistance” is the clay itself, the very means of creation / creating / creator. SImply put, you are not “facing” anything. You’re creating. 

 

“...the feeling that im wasting my time with my friends, what should i do about that?”

”Play it out”. A great, short, simple, effective exercise. If you’re not relaxed, feeling good, having fun playing with your friends...play it out. Think, ok, let’s say I tell them to bolt to I can feel better from doing my practices....and you do, and you do feel better. Then, within you arises the thought... “I should hang with my bros, to have more fun, and feel more excited than I do right now”....so you do, and it is fun....but this style of thinking leads in the dualistic, this or that’s loop you’re sharing with us. If you “play it all the way out”- you see everything you’ll ever do - is for feeling better.  How about flipping that paradigm too - and feeling good and then doing whatever, from that better feeling place? Careful not to let the subtlety about this slip past you. This is the force, the chi, the prank, the “when you’re ready - you won’t have to dodge bullets” stuff. 

So, you, can’t be disciplined, but every activity, and the time allocation of it - can be, because it’s all as simple as a this-or-that choice. Try this out - just write segments of time down on a piece of paper. Maybe.. 9 - 9:30 - meditation, let everything, and every arising thought - go.  Then maybe write down, 6 - 7, play with the homies, let everything else go, and be present, have as much fun as possible - and no worry’s at all about “should I be surrendering” - I can just write it down - “tonight, 10-10:30...meditate, surrender everything” - then get back to fun. 

This “segment thinking” is utilizing duality, rather than pretending you are of it and trying to conform yourself to it in thinking. You’re too big for that, ya ain’t gonna fit you crazy infinite being you.

 

Think in terms of segments of time about this - segments of experience - rather than segments of you. 

In your “letting go”” segments of time....feel into the actuality of purification. Feel when you let go, body relaxes, muscles release, gravity pulls and washes from you, what you let go of. Likewise, inspiration, is inherent in the design of reality. Notice how it fills you up, without you needing to do anything. 

By letting go, you are giving it to the universe, and the universe takes care of everything from there. Divine, no? 

Having let go, the universe fills you with inspiration. There’s no “worth”, no “deserving”, really, at all. This is just how reality is  designed - how you are designed. This is how you deigned the whole thing. You didn’t half ass it bruh. It’s perfect, flawless, seamless, the functionality is so divine and perfect - the functionality can not even be found. It’ not designed for you to strife, to suffer. Let. Go. & Create.

This is just infinite creation, at play.  

 

This post  by nahm resonated with me, because the truth is such a simple concept, check for yourself through your direct experience that i am telling you the truth and if it happens to be all of it, then so be it. What need to make things more paradoxically complex, do the practices, not think about how the practices are doing you. 

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 Tsuki posted this, i thought to myself. Damn caught red handed and i laughed at myself in joy! AHAHA

You see the only thing that can counter this problem is if you imagined the absolute telling you themselves through your own reality, that's what makes the akido as he says more powerful delusion, then it actually is. 

Your trying to link your own fantasy to actuality  (being grounded). 

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This was a great answer, really proud of myself for keeping it professional on the forum, before i would have added some funny references and jokes. It was in response to a thread on my enlightened beings have tried the "no focus- no practice" 

"My original intent of this post was to point to an intentional action one takes for a specific purpose. The specific purpose was not reflected in individual beings answers. How do i show you, you are heavily meshed in mass delusion when you can only interpret from your own filter? If this statement is true, this statement also applies to me. So the statement constantly backfires and with all posts. Therefore i am involved in a mass delusion of epic proportions. A total mass delusion surrounding my entire reality. This reality doesn't reflect what is happening in your reality, dualistic as its sounds because it is grounded in abstract claims. 

it is what it is, we can use it to talk about mu. Instead of me pointing to an invisible claim. My intention were only to see how far the absolute truth goes without deluding myself. it was obviously going to be against enlightened beings that i would have my downfall. As it should be lol The thing i wanted most in life was to be proven wrong, the self-destruction of my own reference axioms, without buying totally into the ideology. However, eventually the points of references, lost their own reality. So imagination started recreating reality itself, using its own axioms of absolute truth. Formulating its own pointers, to guide grounded reality. However, the nature of absolute truth is as such, Your entire world is used as a pointer, if i bought into this own delusion myself and tried to experience what i was imagining for myself. I would have actualized my delusion, but this wouldn't have solved the issue. The issues were the outdated axioms were still in effect. So i needed to figure out how to shift the entire axioms of history. I couldn't use myself as an example, so i had to find someone else who has had a relating experience. 

Any self- proclaimed truth is not truth without external proof, such is the nature of subjective duality. Both of us need to see it, and see it without the creator of it, being part of the back-testing. 

However, my pointers obviously kept failing back-testing over the past month, because the pointers for actuality had already been. I was suggesting objective impossibilities into theoretical foundation test mapping of actuality. The duality of actuality/ imaginary had broken down sending me into pure imagination. So objectively impossibilities were possible. However, they never succeeded against the actuality of absolute infinity. This was because of the single question. Where is nirvana? you see if someone had responded to my pointer, it would mean that nirvana is here in absolute infinity and the axioms were shiftable. However, if it wasn't the case, nirvana was located elsewhere. An objective impossibility, with unshiftable axioms... lost in the actuality as myth. The true nirvana would therefore be Mu . 

The only self-destructive idea was the idea that the objective impossibility was paradoxically false. As godel showed, the statement would self- destruct from the inside as it would not stand the test of actuality .That is what survival is ,the ideology of your imagined world vs the actuality of the truth. I determined that the objective impossibility was objectively impossible to proof without apply self-serving biased to the situation at hand. So the idea imploded on itself. To which Mu became absolute truth once again. Axioms aligned correctly, axioms being "true self actuality" not "true self imagination " ... 

now you guys are kindly helping me get back onto the correct path. To the correct mu, true self, absolute truth 

So now my statements are sounding incorrect from both our points of view and we're steering myself back to the absolute truth. Where as before they were correct for me and incorrect for yourself.

I couldn't even confirm the practice would work, that's how abstract the problem was. My own point of reference was buddha because its self-derived knowledge from my own delusional absolute god. It was a Reconstruction of my axioms, to abstract axioms. However, knowing myself- i would obvious test try the proof before it got sent into practice... because this was prevent mass delusion from the perspective of being. The abstract points of reference, made me feel emotional baggage, such as the event horizon of collapsing that is happening now, never being able to share a reality of actuality, etc.. etc..  it becomes your new survival mechanism. 

This is also how i got the idea of the god-particle totally empty in it's nature being the absolute truth. Its symbolism of pointers created in my own hallucination. 

"

Edited by Aakash

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I feel like what i said is going to be severly misinterpret 

When i said gang gang, i meant everything and nothing LOL 

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I get it now, i get it now, why i can't shift the axioms. 

Because what i'm talking about is nothing to do with I AM existance 

All absolute truths are I AM 

the axiom is that very notion 

I AM existance 

i'm trying to tell people that there is even more to I AM, that even that is subjective. But it doesn't bend to the laws of actuality because all i've said is a rule of something I AM AWARE OF 

what i was trying to say is 

I AM pure nothing 

its an unattainable "I AM" and given by virtue of "I AM" because were locked into existance, so ofcourse it was never going to work and nirvana would just be pure consciusness or mu 

because my issue was that enlightened beings were having multiple awakenings of different things and i said it was infinite 

but it doesn't matter, this is just more content 

We are just talking about I AM existance or pure consciousness we can call it. ofcourse the voice over of their characters is not going to reveal the I AM and hence i was confused. 

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I've been laughing for 5 minutes now 

nothing is the funniest joke ever! nothing can actually be more funnier than it! 

what else be there to do than laugh? 

the funniest thing is how i have an image of it in my head, the single fact that it can be imagined is insanely funny and cool aswell 

Edited by Aakash

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BEST DAY OF MY LIFE 

ITS AN AWAKENING OF THE LEVEL OF HEART 

AN IMAGE OF TRUE SELF N MY REALITY! 

AWAKENING TO ONENESS 

AWAKENING TO NOTHING 

 

ALL AS AN IMAGINE IN MY REALITY! No actuality 

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