Unknown energies being released cuz of breakup with girl I had thing with

[SageModeAustin]

Hello I just did a meditation session and this sensation came up..it felt like I was falling inside of myself like the energy was collapsing within and about to explode, but didn’t? It felt like something intense was going to happen but then it just stopped. 

 

The thoughts that were going through my mind was based around the recent breakup with this girl I had a thing with. She still likes her ex and is trying to go back to him in another state because he recently got out of prison.. The thought of her just getting drilled by her ex (some dude who just got out of fucking prison) enthralls me with rage, violent energy + hopeless victim energy. I dove into it and saw me as the realll nice guy when I was much younger. All the “bad guys” around me getting laid, etc. Which is one of the reasons why I got into pick-up but that’s a whole nother story. Anyways I’m not really sure what to do here..it comes and goes. I use this energy to talk to other women develop my game better, work out, better myself as a person in general through reading etc all the self development things, but eh I feel like it’s running me which is the problem.

Edited June 4, 2019 by SageModeAustin

[flowboy]

As someone working through related shit, my take on it is that you can indeed use it to drive you forward, but people will still be able to feel the toxic energy from that shadow off you. Some people it will bother more than others. Girls will smell it from a mile away.

That said, you don't need to be perfectly free of unprocessed trauma to have good relationships with people.

I recommend picking your favorite form of shadow work practice.

Anything where you zone in on the emotion that was created by a traumatic situation from long ago, and not analyse it but use your body to express it. You probably never raged and cried at full force about it. Enough. In my experience, this is a way to really transform it, instead of suppressing it and having it run your life from the shadows. Handy tools are a long-ass playlist of angry songs and a mattress/pillow to beat on. Try to do it for at least an hour. Several is better. See how you feel then

Have I told you all about how great my week of Primal therapy was for me yet?

[Pallero]

On 4.6.2019 at 6:42 AM, SageModeAustin said:

I dove into it and saw me as the realll nice guy when I was much younger. All the “bad guys” around me getting laid, etc.

Can you go even further into your past? This is just a guess, but what if you lost your mom's attention to some man in your life that you didn't like? Sounds to me like it could be coming from something like that.

[SageModeAustin]

@Pallero Eh, that doesn't trigger me

[Pallero]

@SageModeAustin Ok, well, worth a try

[LordFall]

I mean, that sounds normal. You probably think of yourself as a standup guy and this girl that you liked is going back to her "fuckup" of an ex that got out of prison. Most men would feel shitty about that, even after doing detachment work. 

Just work on yourself and your game and you'll be fine. Embody the characteristic that makes a badboy attractive without having to be one. 

[SageModeAustin]

@LordFall Yeah. Agreed. I had two instant dates on the spot recently..like yesterday I discovered my perfect 10 at the beach and we vibed for 2 hours. I should thank her for giving me this motivation honestly, but i'm still ruminating on how i should've handled things differently before we broke off. I guess that's the most painful thing to let go of. Especially since she blocked me on ig recently too..like we can't even be friends anymore? I mean there was some bad times, but also there was tons of good. Just wack, she crazy too..she has tons of emotional trauma so her ego is attracted to negative energy like her ex, some things I just can't change.