Viking

i cant wake up in the morning

25 posts in this topic

for the last few months ive been sleeping for around 10 hours a day, because i cant force myself to wake up. i dont want to wake up in the morning because sleeping is much better than living. my daily life is not suffering though, its just kinda lame.

i dont have to wake up at 7am or 8am because my classes start at 10am or 12am. i wake up leaving just enough time to eat breakfast, sometimes i dont have time for that and then i need to buy food during the day. i want to meditate too but i dont manage to wake up early enough for that, every day i somehow manage to convince myself not to wake up. i also need to run in the morning for health and dont have time for that too.

how do i make myself wake up?

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Why not meditate and run in the evenings? Sleep as you need?

You seem to be giving yourself a hard time about not maintaining a morning routine, I'm not sure that helps. 

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2 minutes ago, Elisabeth said:

Why not meditate and run in the evenings? Sleep as you need?

You seem to be giving yourself a hard time about not maintaining a morning routine, I'm not sure that helps. 

but i sleep 10 hours

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1 hour ago, Viking said:

but i sleep 10 hours

If you study a lot, maybe that's what you need (during exam periods, I do). Or, if you wear yourself out with anxiety or emotional processing. Or it's your age. Or some allergy, or low thyroid. Or, you would in fact sleep less, if you went to bed earlier. 

More important question is: Do you wake up refreshed?

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If you feel like sleeping 10 hrs then sleep 10 hrs. Getting enough sleep is incredibly important.


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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@Viking

There are certain periods of the night where sleeping is most effective.

What I'm telling you is that you can sleep 6-8 hours max and wake up feeling superb.

The problem is that I think it differs from one person to another, probably because of regional and seasonal differences.

But as a general rule of thumb, try to calculate the night time, so lets say it's 10 hours, I find the perfect time to sleep is in the 20% to 80% of those 10 hours.

So, for example, if the night begins at 8:00 pm and ends at 6:00 am, sleep at 9:30 pm or 10:00 pm, and wake up at 5:00 am or even 4:00 am, and you will feel amazing!

I find my biological clock more aligned with natural clock than the digital one. This actually is of a huge value. But you'll have to give up some night pleasures as well.

P.S. You might feel the need to nap on a more regular basis applying this method.

Let me know if it works for you. Good luck!

Also, make sure you sleep in a fresh air-conditioned room, oxygen is very important for your sleep.

Edited by Truth Addict

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@Viking a word of warning. I slept a lot while I was at university. It warped my sleeping pattern. I was always tired and rarely available to go out with friends. Then the 3 years were up and I felt a black hole of regret. Use your time wisely. You will have plenty of time to sleep when you're dead!

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17 minutes ago, Cosmo said:

@Viking a word of warning. I slept a lot while I was at university. It warped my sleeping pattern. I was always tired and rarely available to go out with friends. Then the 3 years were up and I felt a black hole of regret. Use your time wisely. You will have plenty of time to sleep when you're dead!

if i had any friends or interesting things to do i wouldnt sleep that much

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8 minutes ago, Shiva said:

Then put the alarm on the other side of the room before you go to bed, so you are forced to get up when it rings.

haha, i tried it, but i just stop the alarm and go back to bed.

and i do have a routine, i just dont.

overall i think the solution is to go to sleep earlier.

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Don't get hung up on the idea that you need to be a morning person if it doesn't feel natural for you. Sleep when your body wants to and what gives you the most restful slumber, and ideally schedule things later if that's your rhythm.

Lots like me have "delayed sleep phase disorder" where you can only go to bed after 1AM, but if you're not prevented from sleeping you get your 6-9 hours and have plenty of energy. When I go to bed too early often what happens is I wake up after 5 hours and tired all day.

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On 4/6/2019 at 10:18 PM, Viking said:

if i had any friends or interesting things to do i wouldnt sleep that much

A remark that on the surface seems just an expression of victim thinking, but is actually very profound!

People used to live in small tribes, with tight bonds between each other. Nobody had to think so hard about life purpose, because in a tight-knit group it comes natural to make yourself useful and serve each other.

Your friends would wake you up, to hunt or do work. And you'd be naturally motivated and excited to help, because the connections are so tight and they do the same for you.

 

Stop looking for a disorder. Your lack of a tribe is your disorder. You must find yours or create one.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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On 06/04/2019 at 11:12 AM, Viking said:

my daily life is not suffering though, its just kinda lame.

Perhaps lack of general drive is why you don't want to wake up in the first place? Do you think you could work on changing this? 


“If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.” ― Epictetus

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@Viking if you want to brute force it, making your alarm a catchy (or loud) song is a bit of a hack for waking up. Especially the sort of anthem that would make you want to dance or sing. But that's only a short term solution. I think as @Michael569 said, you need to find a reason for waking up. 

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4 hours ago, Michael569 said:

Perhaps lack of general drive is why you don't want to wake up in the first place? Do you think you could work on changing this? 

drive i think is not something i could gain by insights or watching some motivational video. i think its something that builds over long years or months of action, which has to be directed towards something, but im way too young to know what to look for. also im a student so my only goal is to finish the degree (so im in a bubble)which im about to do, and then ill be able to find drive, when ill have more experience of whats possible.

4 hours ago, flowboy said:

You must find yours or create one.

im afraid in the moment its not possible because as i said im in a bubble, with a very limited amount of people i can talk to, with whom i dont connect, because of age difference.

 

edit: please correct me if you think anything is wrong

Edited by Viking

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Go to bed at the same time every night, pick a time and stick to it and you won't have sleep problems again (unless you're non-24)

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1 hour ago, Viking said:

my only goal is to finish the degree (so im in a bubble)which im about to do, and then ill be able to find drive, when ill have more experience of whats possible.

I understand not having time for a lot else besides your degree. But you certainly have time to start writing your vision. Thinking it will be different when you're older is a trap. Being 26 feels exactly the same as being 20, I can tell you that. There's no magical certainty or direction that just comes with age.

You won't believe the power of repeatedly writing down what you want your life to look like. Make a document right now. Add a little bit to it every evening. Or morning. Start small and add more detail gradually. Add your wildest dreams. This is what creates motivation. Getting up is easy when you know what you're doing it for. If you start right now, you'll benefit from it right now. It helped me immensely.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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4 minutes ago, flowboy said:

I understand not having time for a lot else besides your degree. But you certainly have time to start writing your vision. Thinking it will be different when you're older is a trap. Being 26 feels exactly the same as being 20, I can tell you that. There's no magical certainty or direction that just comes with age.

You won't believe the power of repeatedly writing down what you want your life to look like. Make a document right now. Add a little bit to it every evening. Or morning. Start small and add more detail gradually. Add your wildest dreams. This is what creates motivation. Getting up is easy when you know what you're doing it for. If you start right now, you'll benefit from it right now. It helped me immensely.

ive done that plenty of times, but i guess not in a daily fashion. ill try, thanks.

do you have any tips?

i noticed its very hard for me because i got led to believe that happiness is about not wanting anything etc. also i basically just want good vibes, but i dont know what causes them.

and all i really want right now is a girlfriend because i never had one, but its impossible due to men rich environment and lack of time. also i heared i should spend my 20s on my career and not women

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13 minutes ago, Viking said:

do you have any tips?

This is my tip. Be consistent with it. Add a little bit to it every day for a month, until you have a beautiful outline of an amazing life you could have in some years, describing every facet of it. Detail the friends you will have, the girls you will fuck, the work you will do, the habits you will have, the places you will visit, the books you will have read, the food you will eat. Details. Specifics.

It doesn't all have to come true, but if you keep it vague you won't inspire yourself. Dare to dream.

16 minutes ago, Viking said:

but its impossible due to men rich environment and lack of time.

Watch Leo's video on victim thinking again. Then re-read this thread again and count your limiting beliefs. Count how many times you say: "I can't, because X"

Now don't worry, you are showing willingness to try things so you'll grow out of it at your own pace. But be aware of it.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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30 minutes ago, Viking said:

i got led to believe that happiness is about not wanting anything etc

Fuck that for now.

33 minutes ago, Viking said:

also i heared i should spend my 20s on my career and not women

What do you think?

It is more powerful to do what you think is right, and find out for yourself.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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11 hours ago, flowboy said:

Watch Leo's video on victim thinking again. Then re-read this thread again and count your limiting beliefs. Count how many times you say: "I can't, because X"

i guess youre right in some places. i do have some victim thinking due to past experiences, ill watch the video. but in some places the reasons i gave are more reasons why i dont want something rather than why i cant. like i could get a girlfriend probably, but it would take a lot of effort and time which i would rather invest in my studies.

 

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