Pookie

The struggle with self-actualizing during college

13 posts in this topic

For those of you in college interested in spirituality and practices like meditation, concentration, contemplation, self-inquiry, psychedelic use, shamanic breathing exercises, eating healthy, reading personal development books, even positive affirmations, prepare to suffer in an otherwise inhospitable environment for the likes of you. You will be judged, you will be ostracized, you will be the “weird kid”, you will be treated differently because guess what, you are different, and I’m not sure if that is a good thing. You will not get to experience what it is like to relate to the majority of college kids who spend their time literally doing nothing but the following: gossiping, going out and drinking excessively, smoking weed, posting on the snapchat and other social media, doing god knows what else. I got asked if I could get someone cocaine because I am acquainted with psychedelics, and this just made me laugh. They are not even in the same ballpark. Don’t get me wrong, I have been guilty of doing some of these things, and I am not proud of my past indulgences, but I as I try to become better than my former self in this personal development/spiritual journey, I realize these things are fundamentally hollow, immature, and overall not worthwhile.

It both amazes and saddens me (or more like frustrates me) that not one person I have met during my final college semester is even at the slightest following a path similar to mine. It becomes frustratingly difficult to relate to my peer group. I do not mean to sound arrogant or even think that I am better than anyone, but this personal development journey has made me judgmental, even somewhat misanthropic, towards my college peers. I can’t help but see them as immature, loud, and obnoxious children. Hell, some children I know are not even as bad as they are. I did not intend to mean that this will be the case for everyone in college interested in spiritual/personal development. This just happens to be the case for me, though I suspect many can probably relate and I would not be surprised if so. Regardless, I just wanted to vent my frustrations in hopes that anyone who can relate or who moved on post-college can tell me that it gets better and that I will not be forced to put up and live with such people that wear me out. I would appreciate any advice. Even criticism is welcomed. Maybe I myself am doing something wrong. Thanks for reading.

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I finished college not so long ago and I don't happen to agree. I meditate, visualize, self-inquire and read personal development books and I never had any criticism whatsoever. Obviously, people look at you weirdly when you tell them that you go a week to meditate, but it's understandable and common.

Perhaps you vent too much what you do and your self-image is really tied with the "meditation" or "personal development" guy. I would recommend stop judging people and let them be themselves, that will help you be yourself too. if you are in a campus, it might be difficult to find like-minded people but there are always some cool guys to chill with. They don't have to share everything that you do, but you can have a good time and enjoy yourself.

College is fun so enjoy it while you still can! And remember, learning how to enjoy everything is a spiritual practice by itself. And don't judge yourself if you drink some beers every now and then, even enlightened people do :)


My YouTube Channel: https://bit.ly/2PSLrNb

 

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I used to feel the same way as you until I went out looking for opportunities to meet new people. Get involved with a campus meditation group. The people you are looking for out there, but if they are true self-actualizers they won't be showy about their lifestyles.

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11 hours ago, Pookie said:

You will be judged, you will be ostracized, you will be the “weird kid”, you will be treated differently because guess what, you are different,

This will be a common theme throughout your whole life not just school if you decide to stick to higher-consciousness living. 

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3 minutes ago, Michael569 said:

This will be a common theme throughout your whole life not just school if you decide to stick to higher-consciousness living. 

This is such a great advice.

I ward off self-pity concerning weirdness with a thought:
We're all weird - some of us want to be as weird as everybody else and some want to be weird in their own unique way.

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I felt exactly the same a year ago. Now I realised that I'm still immature on different levels than my peers. 

In my case I still feel like someone who doesn't fit in and I still cut myself off from my peers. 

If you can see your own immaturity you will get less judgemental about others. 

Connecting with them is a different story. You can also try to find people outside college, but that can also be very difficult. 


Check out my channel :ph34r:

https://youtu.be/0uZJOhDxHzs

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@Pookie I used to feel like this, but now i see things slightly different.

Everyone is on different stages of their own path.. so we can't really look down upon people.

Some people are into this stuff, and that's cool! But most people aren't.. so we need to accept these terms somehow and find harmony within that. 

Easier said than done, however ^_^

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Posted (edited)

Embrace your weirdness man!! 

In the end we are all a bunch of weird aliens on a round planet somewhere in a galaxy taking selfies and sniffing cane.

Let the weird be weird and the ignorant be ignorant for now. It's absolutely fine. Life is weird like that. Acceptance is key! 

 

 

 

Edited by Vitamine Water

The art is to look without looking 

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@Pookie Also try to meet people were you will likely find someone that shares you interest, like:

Goa Parties, yoga classes, meditation groups, hippie festivals, workshops, retreats etc. 

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@Pookie hmmmm I’ve had the opposite experience. Heaps of free time at uni and generally found everyone to be extremely nice and accepting. Perfect time to self actualise in my opinion different perspectives I guess  haha.

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Posted (edited)

@Pookie I think you're just hanging around the wrong people. I did the practices that you do for all of the time I was in college. Got some weird looks here and there, but they would stop after explaining why I do what I do.

For example, my colleagues would say I would get sick for not eating breakfast. But they did not know anything about intermittent fasting and ketosis, nor did they know that humans were used thousands of years ago to eat only once or twice every few days. 

Once I (non-condescendingly) educated them on the topic, they would see nothing weird in it.

After that, people would actually respect me more because I would be seen as very driven, disciplined, dependable and caring for the very practices that I did.

Good thing is, you are free to choose the people you hang out with. It is YOUR responsibility to find the people interested in the same things as you. Quality people won't just drop on your lap from the sky. YOU CAN find people that are both the same age as you AND interested in this stuff.

I went through the same phase you are going through right now. I know it's frustrating for you to develop and everybody else remain the same, no matter how much you push them. It's natural for judgments to come up in your mind.

But, realize that it can't be any other way. You can find people on the same frequency as you, but you gotta make room for them. Don't wait for the ones deeply asleep to wake up. You may end up waiting for a lifetime. 

Don't victimize yourself and find the woke people.

Edited by DanTheLurker

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