What's the #1 Thing to do to become more unconditionally loving?

[Bluebird]

If I wanted to embrace that universal love, the unconditional and infinite love you can experience in a nondual experience or most psychedelic trips what would be the recommendation.

Of course, you could say enlightenment, but that seems a little binary for me. I generally meditate 1hr+ per day and have seen little increase in my ability to love more fully and unconditionally, so whilst this is doubtlessly a way to get there, I believe there could be better ways. If meditation has been most effective for you, let me know and I will dedicate more of myself to this.

This feels like a very important step on my journey right now. So what has been the most effective method to embrace unconditional love in your own life?

I have some of my own ideas, but want to see what others have found to be effective in their own experience. Any and ALL thoughts are appreciated.

Edited January 10, 2019 by Bluebird

[OneLittleHumanMind]

See if someone is doing harm to you in your life, and forgive them for that. Forgive them so fully that you feel how their actions towards you are what is meant to be. But only embrace that, don't build a martyr mentality. Also start to love them, so that only thing you can feel is warmness and unity with those people.

I used to hate some things my boyfriend did and I deduced that he did them TO ME. (Which is a lie.) I didn't fully love him for all he was, only when he did the right actions. Now when I've reasoned this love issue and started to feel more embracing lately, I've learned to love also the bad actions/person I encountered earlier.

Love what you would want others to love in yourself and continuously expand that.

[Space]

@Bluebird Well of course you have metta practise, which is specifically designed to make you more loving and open. Each teacher has their own particular metta technique so there can be quite a bit of variation. You could give this one a go: https://www.personalpowermeditation.com/why-choose-love/ (also a great blog in general). 

[luckieluuke]

Oh I wish it was so simple to forgive someone, just say it. But it´s not or you´r lying to yourself, even more importantly never lie to yourself. I wish I could forget a certain person in my life but I cannot. When ive grown I will. Even thou "I" did nothing wrong and I was painfully exploited and used. Thing Is that I create the pain and I have not fully come to terms with my own shadow...so In a way I am not ready to forgive that person because I am not ready to love and forgive myself.
Now this is the tricky part, how to love yourself unconditionally despite all the stuff I don´t like about "myself"
Leo had a really nice episode on love, with a really nice exercise I do from time to time, something like: Imagine something external that brings you love, feel the love inside and spread it out to everything around you, Feel the love everywhere and bring it back inside you and let it expand.
But also be honest with yourself and deal with any trauma you have and become aware of your true nature.

[Gabriel Antonio]

First of all, you can’t be unconditionally lovIng with everybody. That’s just an unrealistic expectation.  Remember that you’re not Jesus...

But anyway, the way I’ve found to be more unconditionally love towards myself is through having strong bonds with my close friends. 

[Anton Rogachevski]

Going to groups of spiritual development and listening without judging.

[cetus]

@Bluebird If you were taking your last breath you'd love everything unconditionally. Live every moment like it's your last.

[universe]

Definitely you want to feel love in yourself first. Be kind and loving to yourself. Always, especially when you feel that you dont deserve love.

See if you hold any grudges against you, no matter what. And let them go. Practice acceptance.

[Bluebird]

@cetus56 Thanks, I like it.

[Joseph Maynor]

All love comes from how one feels about themselves first and foremost.

[SQAAD]

@Gabriel Antonio Actually you can!

[Mu_]

21 hours ago, Bluebird said:

@cetus56 Thanks, I like it.

Question into the likeness of all beings, what do all humans share and have in common, even mammals and fish and birds and maybe even plants.  Question into the suffering the other person is going through who causes you suffering.  This is not a one off kinda thing, its a on goingness kinda process. 

These I have found to bring out unconditional love, acceptance and a reduction of reaction to life situations that would of caused me to lash out.

[ivory]

I recently started doing loving kindness meditation (metta) for that exact reason. I do it three times a week now and I would highly recommend it.

[Recursoinominado]

 

On 10/01/2019 at 7:28 AM, Space said:

@Bluebird Well of course you have metta practise, which is specifically designed to make you more loving and open. Each teacher has their own particular metta technique so there can be quite a bit of variation. You could give this one a go: https://www.personalpowermeditation.com/why-choose-love/ (also a great blog in general). 

Man, this topic came in the perfect time, thank you for this recommendation! 

[Sahil Pandit]

@Bluebird This video may resonate with you.

There are some very counter intuitive points on here, especially when it comes to the relationship of Love and Control.

I hope you can find juicy bits of wisdom here:

 

[Bluebird]

@Sahil Pandit Thanks, I'll give it a watch.

Figured I'd also add something myself. I've begun to see that love can best be shared when you become completely present and accepting of this moment. When you don't need anything other than what you have. In this state love can flow freely since it becomes non-needy.

I have found sustained mindfulness helpful for this.

[Sahil Pandit]

@Bluebird Yes i agree with you.

Although in practice, this seems so much more counter intuitive. 

I'm going to rewatch the video i sent you haha.

[Barna]

Loving lesson 101: Don't judge.

Loving lesson 102: When you judge, love the judgement, and love yourself for judging.  

[ivory]

Notice your judgements but also notice that the things you judge others for you are guilty of yourself. Then throw it away. Learn to live more authentically and your judgements will start to fade. Love blossoms from that place.

[aklacor727]

For me, unconditional love stems from the deep realization that everyone is at their own point in life, and they are really doing the best they can at their present level of awareness and current life situation. Judgment, blame, and hate will do nothing to help the matter. Full acceptance of what is, patient loving kindness, understanding and presence may. Compassion for the fact that this is a real hard world we are living in, and it is not difficult for anyone to fall into a dark place. Most people do not know how to get out. Be their light rather than adding to that darkness