The Motivation Timeout Issue

[Sayak]

Hey,

I have shuffled through a lot of motivational videos and have had fascinating conclusions drawn which actually helps me be more insightful about myself and understand the intricate workings of my system(well to cut the brag a bit, somewhat i can see the faint glitter of light in place which was pitch dark). that certainly is a considerable leap, tallying the previous helplessness i felt when things didnt seem to work out much and everything seemed to be a mess. Leo's inspirational videos about self help and developing habits were particularly helpful as i can proudly say that i did quit smoking and have been able to inculcate a few habits here and there.

But the fact that haunts me (and if somebody shares my type) is that the motivation which forms a goal to which i make steps of advancement sometimes fades out and the normal mode of the previous helplessness revives. A bit of clarification for the benefit of explanation and to help others reckon if they face the same stuff:

I have been a hardcore porn addict for the past 12 years, and it led me to masturbate, on an average, thrice a day. Needless to say it drained me of energy and today at the age of 25, i find myself utterly lost when it comes to interaction with people. With guys and men, i interact with a diluted focus which gives them the impression that i am lacking the vital backbone stuff somewhere, thus putting me to the 'taken for granted' bin. With girls, (here is what porn possibly does the most harm) i seem to directly focus all attention to sexuality, so that freaks them out. A thorough insightful study by myself revealed that i tend to be confident and slightly out of the shell and focussed if i abstain for a few days. I can look into eyes of people with a wee bit more confidence than if i have let those white little creatures out of my system. 

So that being explained, its pretty clear that i have a thorough understanding about the ill effects of masturbation, and i seem to be motivated enough to quit it with immidiate effect. And this is precisely where i face the biggest problem. 

Whenever one feels motivated to accomplish something, they set goals and follow the guides. I too, in initial phases, followed the same chore. But the real problem jutts out right after. A little while through the distance between start point and goal, the engine of motivation somewhat loses gas. I feel utterly dragged by the slightest sexual stimulus and find myself over masturbating after a short period of absistence. The television, sudden internet pop ups, some pics of chicks in facebook, and lot other wee bits and pieces of sexual stimulus seems to drag me to the level 0.

So the question is, how to specifically motivate myself, to abstain. its obviously good to have some real sexual relationship, that which is fulfilling, but the hinderence is pretty huge and sometimes forced absistence results in whirlwinds of mental imageries of sexuality which itself is a dragger.

really tired fighting this one single vice for ages. any structured help or suggestion will be immensely appriciated.       

[A way to Actualize]

@Sayak I exactly know what You are talking about. Discipline did not work for me, I am Too of a Creative type where I like being spontanious. Those goals give You only more things to fail at. Spirituality gives here the solution: being more loving. I can not go into the dephts of the discovery I have found here, but check out Matt Kahn, I became so functional and completely my social skills are so awesome and healthy focused. So much more, but it is hard To believe. Scroll to his Youtube page and click on the Video that resonates.

btw, all those nasty habits Will dissolve if You Watch a certain Video of his (True divine Nature). I Will send a link to that Video if you have watched the other one, otherwise it may be hard To understand (quite advanced and transformative). Unlike all things You have seen before.