youngshinzen

How to cry?

31 posts in this topic

Now that I‘m off of my meds and more connected to myself through meditation, I can sense that the pressure and pain I have around my shoulder, neck and all the way up to my eye brows is a blockage that wants to be released through tears. If I really focus on the upcoming tear it builds up but won‘t come out. Sometimes I remember to check in with how I really feel and am able to get one tear out, that‘s it, the “door“ closes.

Any advice on how to progress?

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This may be useless or not helpful, idk it helps me. When I know I need to cry I watch very emotional videos like military people coming home to their families, or an interview of a homeless person talking about the hardships of homelessness. Anything that really shows a lot of human love or human sorrow gets me to weep and weep. I remember the first time I tried this was after a really negative trip in which I gained almost no insights and I only felt bad about my situation in life, so I watched some of those videos and my lord did I cry. I don't know if those tears released the pent up anguish but I sure felt a million times better after I cried. I also felt more compassion because i was resonating my suffering with that of others and so it brought about an enormous wave of sadness to release.

Maybe that will work, maybe it won't, but I think you asked a very important question because when I don't cry for extended periods of time I really feel like shit on the inside and I am more angry and easy to upset. Crying really softens the heart in my opinion.

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I’d recommend you try: 

  • Leo’s Shamanic Breathing Technique
  • Holotropic Breathwork
  • Reichian Therapy
  • Psychedelics
  • Long Isolation Meditation Sit (several hours and just sit with yourself)

You sound too in your head in this process. Sounds like your mind is what’s getting in the way.

 

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@Pat Pagano I forgot to mention that I tried that and yes that did something for me. Not many tears but I started to sob. I‘ll do that more often in the future.

And I think you‘re right with the last part, I also feel attacked quite easily and angry because of that.

@kieranperez I‘ll try some of these, thank you! Do you think that certain psychedelics tend to make a person cry?

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Really struggling with this too, one thing I know u can try is just stand in front of the mirror and keep weeping out "why... why..." and think of all the pain and shit you've been through  in your life. tried it but didnt work on me maybe itll help you

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23 hours ago, Pat Pagano said:

This may be useless or not helpful, idk it helps me. When I know I need to cry I watch very emotional videos like military people coming home to their families, or an interview of a homeless person talking about the hardships of homelessness. Anything that really shows a lot of human love or human sorrow gets me to weep and weep. I remember the first time I tried this was after a really negative trip in which I gained almost no insights and I only felt bad about my situation in life, so I watched some of those videos and my lord did I cry. I don't know if those tears released the pent up anguish but I sure felt a million times better after I cried. I also felt more compassion because i was resonating my suffering with that of others and so it brought about an enormous wave of sadness to release.

Maybe that will work, maybe it won't, but I think you asked a very important question because when I don't cry for extended periods of time I really feel like shit on the inside and I am more angry and easy to upset. Crying really softens the heart in my opinion.

What's likely going on is you've recognize these videos bring up feelings of sadness/sorrow/grief/etc, but you haven't realized that these feelings aren't related to the videos at all. The videos are triggering past emotional trauma, and you are just reliving previous emotions that you've never properly dealt. A trigger is just a way for trapped emotions to let you know on a conscious level that something really needs your attention. What you need to look into is shadow work, I recommend The Emotion Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson (this helped me immensely).

If both you and the OP have difficulty feeling certain 'negative' emotions at appropriate times, it's probably because when in the past you were faced with these difficult emotions you either couldn't/didn't want to/weren't allowed to fully feel these emotions. That led to your subconscious/emotional body putting up guards against similar experiences in the future, "he's got his walls up." It's a survival/defense mechanism.

If a person suppresses these emotions long enough, then those emotions essentially shutdown. This happens a lot with men, because they're told all their life that showing emotion is weak. A lot of men say they've never seen their father cry, how awful is that? When you suppress all of those necessary emotions, not only does it effect you emotionally, it will start showing up as physical disease. It's your bodies last hail mary to get you to recognize something is wrong.

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8 hours ago, youngshinzen said:

Do you think that certain psychedelics tend to make a person cry?

I don't know if you can find it where you live, but Ayahuasca.

When I went to my second ceremony, I felt reconnected to my inner child and I cried for 4 straight hours. I hadn't cried in years! It felt like such a big relief. It was as if it was raining for the first time in years. Like, "OMG! How did I live without this??"

I don't take Ayahuasca anymore. But it made me get in touch with my feelings. I don't cry as much as I would like to, but there are times that I do cry. And it feels like a gift when it happens. 

?

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9 hours ago, youngshinzen said:

 

@kieranperez I‘ll try some of these, thank you! Do you think that certain psychedelics tend to make a person cry?

Have a "bad" trip. You'll cry probably more than you ever thought you were capable of. As far as I'm concerned, I think psychedelics have SO much potential for emotional healing and ego integration (which is GOOD!!!) with the right intentions going into the trip. I saw you wanted to pursue Truth full on in another post - good luck going into that with a weak fragmented ego structure. 

However, before going into psychedelics I would explore the Holotropic/Shamanic Breathing and Reichian Therapy. Also learn about Dream Work and psychoanalysis. However, I think you're too stuck in your head and that these more "mental" approaches are just going to be adding to the problem. 

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On 14.11.2018 at 0:48 AM, youngshinzen said:

Now that I‘m off of my meds and more connected to myself through meditation, I can sense that the pressure and pain I have around my shoulder, neck and all the way up to my eye brows is a blockage that wants to be released through tears. If I really focus on the upcoming tear it builds up but won‘t come out. Sometimes I remember to check in with how I really feel and am able to get one tear out, that‘s it, the “door“ closes.

Any advice on how to progress?

To release those blockages focus your sexuality into the colon and left leg then the appendix on the right leg (forest gump wound) and let the jaw relax, you will feel maybe needle pain in the throat doing this and in your left shoulder and thumbs. 

Best of luck!


... 7 rabbits will live forever.                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

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On ‎11‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 8:56 PM, Pat Pagano said:

This may be useless or not helpful, idk it helps me. When I know I need to cry I watch very emotional videos like military people coming home to their families, or an interview of a homeless person talking about the hardships of homelessness. Anything that really shows a lot of human love or human sorrow gets me to weep and weep. I remember the first time I tried this was after a really negative trip in which I gained almost no insights and I only felt bad about my situation in life, so I watched some of those videos and my lord did I cry. I don't know if those tears released the pent up anguish but I sure felt a million times better after I cried. I also felt more compassion because i was resonating my suffering with that of others and so it brought about an enormous wave of sadness to release.

Maybe that will work, maybe it won't, but I think you asked a very important question because when I don't cry for extended periods of time I really feel like shit on the inside and I am more angry and easy to upset. Crying really softens the heart in my opinion.

music does it for me. 

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I have the exact same problem! I coudlnt even cry a single tear highly rational/logical person.

I made good progress the last month. Try the sedona method to really allow yourself to feel your feelings, it takes a lot of practice and time to get this. Someday something just clicked for me.

Now sometimes when I hear some music that gives me goosebumps or I see something beautiful I can sometimes let go and will get watery eyes and some tears out. It feels really good to be in touch with ones emotions. 

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On 11/14/2018 at 7:37 PM, kieranperez said:

I’d recommend you try: 

  • Leo’s Shamanic Breathing Technique
  • Holotropic Breathwork
  • Reichian Therapy
  • Psychedelics
  • Long Isolation Meditation Sit (several hours and just sit with yourself)

You sound too in your head in this process. Sounds like your mind is what’s getting in the way.

 

@youngshinzen Yeah, I agree with the above advice (I'm sure there are other ways too). Holotropic breathwork and other body centered techniques certainly could help. Intuitive dancing too is a gentle method: Play music and let your body move as it pleases. Maybe also the "do nothing" meditation technique. You're maintaining a high level of control, you need to learn to let go of some of it. You can do that alone, or with a therapist (which may be easier, but that depends from person to person).

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@Pernani Thank you! I will try that.

@Elysian Thanks for explaining the mechanism in depth.

@Gabriel Antonio Are you able to reconnect with that emotion after the trip? Did you also feel like you were more “in your body“ when being connected to the child?

@kieranperez Which mental approaches do you mean?

@Hellspeed First off, I gotta research where all the body parts are? What‘s the basis of this approach? Any sources?

@MM1988 I feel like that too, meditation helped to become more aware of subtle reactions in the body and how to release the tension in them. It feels like I‘m close to being able to consciously relax the blockages to the point that it will pour out of me, but it still needs some time. Thanks anyways!

@Elisabeth Dancing is a good idea, especially slowly and consciously. Thanks!

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15 minutes ago, youngshinzen said:

Dancing is a good idea, especially slowly and consciously. Thanks!

Or dynamically and consciously ... depends on the emotion you need to express really. If it's anger or passion or plain tension, slow might not do it.

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8 hours ago, youngshinzen said:

 

@Hellspeed First off, I gotta research where all the body parts are? What‘s the basis of this approach? Any sources?

 

 

 

The source is your breath :) So if you want to know more in detail ask me in private, all the advice I expose on this forum is experience based, I only do research on my on Breath. (this does not mean that there is not accurate info out there, I just gather the info from the Akashic records so to speak, using astral projection). 

Best of luck


... 7 rabbits will live forever.                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

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bioenergetics. try "the bow" specifically. It works wonder for getting out emotions and blockages. Elliot hulse has some good videos on the bow

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@TripleNipple Did bioenergetic therapy for a few months, it‘s definitely a powerful technique. But to me it feels like popping a pimple that‘s not ripe yet, something will come out, but it‘s not a satisfying explosion. I’m looking for ways that are more natural, subtle and easy. But maybe I‘ll get back to it, thank you!

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@youngshinzen Maybe try to look for tensions in your stomach. This one was huge for me, you have to be totally relaxed if your want your emotions to flow.

I always had a tension in my stomach as if I were to flex my abs, I thought this is just how it is or its just because of the way I'm sitting and it has nothing to do with how I feel. I couldnt consciouslessly let it go. Then one day I did the sedona method over and over again and suddenly something in my stomach relaxed. The emotions went up from my stomach through my chest and face and brought a tear to my eyes. The tension was gone for a good hour.

I couldnt even tell you what emotions it was or why, just general depression, so its not like some big issue got resolved or something dramatic like that. I was just shocked that my body could even do that. 

I thought why the fuck is this not thought in school but then again I'm probably a special case of left-brained neurotic type of male. It hasnt really anything to do with the sedona method but that was just the step-by-step kind of thing someone with a brain like me needs. I heard about allowing emotions but for me it was just a word and nothing I could actually do.

If you can get even a single tear out you are much further than I was, you know what its like and when you do it right, try to get to that place again and stay there.

Edited by MM1988

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@MM1988 Yes that‘s how it feels for me too, mostly when I relax my heart or face the tear surfaces. I guess we just have to keep going, increase body awareness and let go. Wishing you luck!

@Nahm That‘s a good point, I forget how much baggage I carry even when I feel good and calm. Making myself vulnerable by saying that should help, I‘ll try it. Thanks master obi nahm kenobi.

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