Slade

The one thing that contributes most to your happiness and health in life is...

33 posts in this topic

The quality of your relationships. Good relationships keep us happy and healthy. 

The harvard study of adult Development is a study that’s been going on for over 75 years and the clearest message it has shown for what gives us the most satisfaction in life is close warm relationships. 

Even enlightened people can get lonely. Humans are a social animal. There’s a ted talk on YouTube about this, check it out.

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Yup. This should be self-evident to anyone who have spent some time contemplating life. Looking back, all my most cherished moments was spent with the people I care about. My relationship to my loved ones are hands down the most valued aspect of my life.


INSTEAD OF COMMUNICATING WITH PEOPLE AS IF THEY POSSESSED INTELLIGENCE, TRY USING ABSTRACT SPIRITUAL TERMS THAT CONVEY NO USABLE INFORMATION. :)

My first published essay

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5 hours ago, Slade said:

Even enlightened people can get lonely. Humans are a social animal.

If a person don't enjoy his loneliness, he is not enlightened. 

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@Slade

I agree to an extent.

If you can't enjoy being alone to a certain degree, that's a problem. Everyone undoubtedly needs to be comfortable with themselves.

But from there, relationships can be an amazing experience to have if you choose.

I see a lot of idealization about being some sort of "lone crusader" in the spiritual community. There is value in doing certain activities alone, but I see a lot of value in working with people as well. You're not an isolated island.


 

 

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So you depend on others to be happy? If you cannot be utterly alone, if you are happy only With a good relationship, then there is a problem. To be alone is in our nature, there is much beauty and ecstasy in it. Much peace.

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3 hours ago, Prabhaker said:

If a person don't enjoy his loneliness, he is not enlightened. 

Exactly. Im alone and im content. Its not relationships lmao. True happiness is uncondtional.

3 minutes ago, Highest said:

So you depend on others to be happy? If you cannot be utterly alone, if you are happy only With a good relationship, then there is a problem. To be alone is in our nature, there is much beauty and ecstasy in it. Much peace.

Its crazy. What people call "normal" is actually insane.

If other people are happy, you are happy.

If other people are angry, you are angry

If other people are sad, you are sad.

Its like you are their little puppet. Depending on every emotion they have, so, you can replicate it.

Isnt this insame?

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Of course, people who think of loneliness as a bad thing will suffer, on the other hand i know people with 100+ relationships, including great ones who cant be by themselves for a minute without fiending for the next social event.


Dont look at me! Look inside!

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7 minutes ago, Ether said:

Exactly. Im alone and im content. Its not relationships lmao. True happiness is uncondtional.

Its crazy. What people call "normal" is actually insane.

If other people are happy, you are happy.

If other people are angry, you are angry

If other people are sad, you are sad.

Its like you are their little puppet. Depending on every emotion they have, so, you can replicate it.

Isnt this insame?

That's what you get from relationship. Solitude, as all religions propose, is the best thing to do if you want to know yourself and therefore acquire true happines.

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There’s a balance of course, as with anything. 

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Sorry but I think its more about how you feel about your surroundings. Someone with anxiety will not fell as happy around friends as someone without it.

Also in the study from the ted talk, it just seems like they studied things that might look important related to this based on intuition. It didn't look like they first studied if its actually directly related to it based on evidence. So i am not sure how legit the study is. 

However, it does seem like a possibility.

Edited by BjarkeT

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@SchallUndRauch Its called Social Liposuction, its when you use so much energy small talking that you start to lose weight. Doctors hate it.


Dont look at me! Look inside!

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3 minutes ago, Rilles said:

@SchallUndRauch Its called Social Liposuction, its when you use so much energy small talking that you start to lose weight. Doctors hate it.

Yeah, they tryna milk that money

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The quality of relationships is based off our own energy. Happiness is the egg being broken from the inside out thus life begins. If the egg is broken from the outside in, life ends. The happiness from outside of self is an illusion and Prabhaker said it best.


B R E A T H E

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On 6/16/2018 at 3:38 PM, Highest said:

So you depend on others to be happy? If you cannot be utterly alone, if you are happy only With a good relationship, then there is a problem. To be alone is in our nature, there is much beauty and ecstasy in it. Much peace.

We are a social animal, not a solitary one. Our ancestors lived in herds, going milions of years back. To be outcast from the group, as a stone age homo sapiens, homo erectus, cromag etc, meant death. To be with loved ones is in our nature. This is why solitary confinement is such a barbaric punishment and considered a form of torture by human rights organisations. It is why loneliness is more deadly than smoking cigarets. 

Like most of you, I really enjoy spending time alone. Short term isolation can be wonderful. In the long term tho, we only truely thrive in relation to others. Even if you have bought into an ideology that tells you something different, like that your happiness should be independent from external factors, thats just not how homo sapiens is evolved. Its like claiming you shouldn't depend on oxygen and water, becourse my ideology says so. You can take short breaks from oxygen, water and relationships, but wether your life will be long and happy or not does depend on several external factors. 


INSTEAD OF COMMUNICATING WITH PEOPLE AS IF THEY POSSESSED INTELLIGENCE, TRY USING ABSTRACT SPIRITUAL TERMS THAT CONVEY NO USABLE INFORMATION. :)

My first published essay

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"Loneliness is what gives you the vision of a genius" - Leo Gura

"If you cannot be alone and be ok it's that your not in good company" - Sadhguru

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I don't really understand loneliness anymore. I used to feel lonely but I can't remember why, or what it feels like. I'm so pleased with this progress.

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@Sparkist

The most important relationship is the relationship between You and Yourself, and If You built that relationship correctly, You will be happy even When You are alone, but that does not mean to avoid relationships with others, It means giving the priority to the relationship between You and Yourself ( Being satisfied about Yourself ).

Edited by Star Net

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