Jarrad

Existential Crisis

14 posts in this topic

If the only problem is the fact that I identify myself as a person with a problem then:

 

I create all meaning and purpose, there is nothing inherent to reality

 

If there is nothing inherent to reality then:

 

I can't exist. But I am the experience of god, and I am here to be solely this experience in this present moment

 

The experience is to be, and to be is the experience

 

But if I am the experience, there must be some reason I am the experience 

 

But all meaning and reason is a construct of my imagination, so I cannot have a reason to be the experience

 

If there is no reason or purpose to the experience, then how does it exist?

 

If the reason or purpose is desire, if desire is the creator of all things and the reason for existence then:

 

There is a reason that was created by god, but god is everything. So if the reason is everything then:

 

The reason for existence is everything and nothing. So much everything that it also encompasses nothing

 

If the reason for existence is the infinite sum of reasons, then there is no words for the meaning of existence because the meaning would be everything.  The meaning is all meanings and the reason is all reasons and the purpose is all purposes.

 

There cannot be a reason, meaning, or purpose but here I am. How can I be without a reason, meaning or purpose? Why would I be here without a reason, meaning or purpose?

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Look inwards, not outwards. You think you know everything, but you don't. You attach meaning, purpose and reason but they are not inwards, they are outwards.

Does life inherit these traits? If not... Then accept that and allow reality to be


You're not human, you're the universe

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for purposes of mental health, you can always pick an arbitrary meaning or purpose, such as learn an instrument or surf a big wave or something.  Often feels better to be oriented than un-oriented.  Whatever you enjoy, just work on it for a couple hours. Maybe set some goals. In my experience, i get existentially angsty when I'm not working, and i feel better when i work on a project. 

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2 hours ago, Bryan Lettner said:

In my experience, i get existentially angsty when I'm not working, and i feel better when i work on a project. 

Thought feeds and sustains it’s own movement in the activity of concentration. 

But this is a mechanical movement that must be maintained in order to sustain a sense of the gratification that is achieved in the pursuit of that pleasure. Only to seek pleasure is to seek pain. They are one and the same movement. 

This is to introduce thought “concentration”  as a means to bring about psychological order. Only to invite thought as a means to self sooth the psyche perpetuates psychological disorder.

When it comes to the psychological realm thought “concentration” has no place. When there is the cessation of thought within in the psychological realm, psychological health is nothing but bliss. 

FREEDOM WITHOUT THE MOVEMENT OF CONCENTRATION, “THE OSERVER” IMPLIES TOTAL ATTENTION,  “ WHEN THE OBSERVER IS NOT. THE ENDING OF DUAITY.

THIS IS TIMELESSNESS

 

 :)Have you gone into this before? 

 

 

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@Faceless Interesting thoughts. Although, I do far less thinking when i'm working than when i'm not.  the closest i've ever come to an ego death would be during flow-states when i'm not thinking or concentrating, but just "channelling", more or less. just pure witnessing.

but then, i'm no expert on this stuff.  wouldn't call myself a serious student. i dont really care much about becoming enlightened.  

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32 minutes ago, Bryan Lettner said:

Interesting thoughts. Although, I do far less thinking when i'm working than when i'm not. 

Oh you mean compulsive thinking. No I’m talking about not having to do anything and still maintaining a deep silence. 

 

32 minutes ago, Bryan Lettner said:

the closest i've ever come to an ego death would be during flow-states when i'm not thinking or concentrating, but just "channelling", more or less. just pure witnessing.

Wouldn’t call it ego death. Hehe

But If we are focused on any particularl activity that is a movement of thought/self. Thought and concentration are the same movement/mechanism. Channeling is a movement of thought. Compulsive thoughts will tend to quiet in that state because the majority of focus is directed on a particular point/activity. But never the less is still thought/self in movement. 

32 minutes ago, Bryan Lettner said:

but then, i'm no expert on this stuff.  wouldn't call myself a serious student. i dont really care much about becoming enlightened.  

Yeah I understand totally. I wouldn’t call myself an expert either, and I consider myself a student of life. And I also never heard about enlightenment and pursued it, thanks heavens. For me there was an uninvited perception that did show me the nature of psychological time. In that I was freed from time. But I never chased “enlightenment” as that would have it quite impossible and taken away from the joy all together. Hehe

 I am now interested in having a capacity to observe without the veil of mind as I know there is much more to life than what the conditioned mind presents. 

For me the fact that enlightenment wasn’t even a thing actually allows for a much deeper sense of being. I am not concerned with “enlightenment.” I am concerned much more with having a deep understanding of myself and my nature. I enjoy exploring the nature of thought/self and observing without the limited observer. 

 

What do you work on project wise if you don’t mind me asking??

Edited by Faceless

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@Jarrad Your crisis is rooted in your trust in reason.
Reason is a man-made concept related to other man-made concepts of cause and effect.

You are not doing things because you have reasons to do them.
Things do themselves and you narrate them as you go.

We think that we do things because we want to do them. To us, will is a cause of actions.
The problem is that will is an action in itself and we very rarely want to want before we want.
How is then our wanting ours, if wanting is not caused by us? It isn't.
Wanting simply is and we define ourselves against or in accord with it.

Human animal has no capacity for reason in the sense of imposing its will onto reality through actions.
Reality plays itself out through our wants, desires, reasons and meanings. We are mere puppets.
Godly puppets but still, puppets. To claim ownership of Logos, Tao, etc is a grave mistake.
To let go of control is to gain freedom.

Isn't that the greatest paradox?


Bearing with the conditioned in gentleness, fording the river with resolution, not neglecting what is distant, not regarding one's companions; thus one may manage to walk in the middle. H11L2

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7 hours ago, Jarrad said:

Why would I be here without a reason, meaning or purpose?

Only thought/mind creates a need to understand THINGS. 

 

Understand the nature of thought/self and it’s all claear. 

 

Life is much more significant than we think. Once we understand why we want to understand everything just feels much more like a playground than an obstacle. 

 

Yet there is at the same time a deep sense of responsibility that we see as a fundamental necessity when it comes to bringing about a revolution in the stream of consciousness. At least I do, and I know others that do as well..That way other us’s won’t have to go through the agonies that we do. 

 

Any way jusy explore yourself. Not to get anywhere but because it’s interesting. Actually to me there is nothing more interesting. 

 

GOOD LUCK?

Edited by Faceless

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if there is no objective reality, then whatever you find most meaningful, subjectively, is not arbitrary - it is your deepest purpose. In other words, if there is no objective reality against which to test your subjective meaning for veridicality, then subjective meaning is _true_ meaning. 

 

And even if you maintain this idea of an objective reality, subjectivity is not a subset of objectivity, but they are two sides of the same coin, namely the totality of reality. objective reality is not the whole of reality, but a subset stripped of the subjective aspect. What I mean is that even under the materialist paradigm, subjective meaning is nested under total reality, and therefore an intrinsic part of it, even though, definitionally, objective reality lacks meaning (since we define objective reality as the subset of reality stripped of all subjective aspects). It's like "beauty". It exists in all the ways we care about, unless you definitionally say it doesn't exist since it doesn't fit in the objectivity category (which is a mere conceptual fabrication) which is the criterion we chosen for saying things exist. You must be very trapped in conceptual fuckery if you convince yourself that beauty doesn't exist. the same goes for meaning.

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@Faceless Your outlook on life sounds interesting.

Quote

But If we are focused on any particularl activity that is a movement of thought/self. Thought and concentration are the same movement/mechanism. Channeling is a movement of thought. Compulsive thoughts will tend to quiet in that state because the majority of focus is directed on a particular point/activity. But never the less is still thought/self in movement. 

I don't see anything wrong with movement or thought or engagement, as long as we don't identify it.  Open to different perspectives here. 

The projects I work on vary. making music, exploratory math, writing, miscellaneous brainstorming for inventions n stuff

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1 hour ago, Bryan Lettner said:

I don't see anything wrong with movement or thought or engagement, as long as we don't identify it.  Open to different perspectives here. 

 

Of course...Thought is a tool. As long as it’s not the boss there’s no problem. Actually when thought is put in order one can use thought more efficiently. And when one can be free of the stream of experience that allows for creativity. :)

1 hour ago, Bryan Lettner said:

The projects I work on vary. making music, exploratory math, writing, miscellaneous brainstorming for inventions n stuff

That sounds awesome. Very interesting indeed. 

Edited by Faceless

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35 minutes ago, Bryan Lettner said:

I don't see anything wrong with movement or thought or engagement, as long as we don't identify it.

If you don't identify with it, then "you" doesn't exist. 


You're not human, you're the universe

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