Buba

What to do in dark night of the soul?

127 posts in this topic

On 10/2/2018 at 1:04 PM, SoonHei said:

i suppose the underlying fact here is that "knowing that there is no self" does not help... you must have experiential experience of it otherwise the suffering that arises, you would automatically associate with it. without leaving any room or space to be able to see thru it and thus end the suffering..

I think when we realize that there is no self we should have also a new component where the consciousness can be sustained, as we need an identification and we think we are our story of us (ego), when we realize that it was all a story and false identification there are lot of anxiety and depression since consciousness is no longer being hold for that idea, so consciousness needs a new place or being to identify itself, we need to develop a new state of mind first (identification with spirit, pure love, wholeness) but in an experienced way so that consciousness don't get afraid of losing the ground.  I think a great way to do it is thru Kriya Yoga and ACIM.

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A true Dark Night of the Soul is like grieving a death.  Either the death of the Egoic self, or the death of Ego more broadly; i.e., the death of Other Beings, the death of the External World, the death of Thoughts.

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No pain, no gain. Otherwise is only mind's old patterns. 


... 7 rabbits will live forever.                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

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On October 5, 2018 at 10:42 AM, Joseph Maynor said:

A true Dark Night of the Soul is like grieving a death.  Either the death of the Egoic self, or the death of Ego more broadly; i.e., the death of Other Beings, the death of the External World, the death of Thoughts.

Would you say there are different degrees to this experience of grieving? Seems there is this common notion in spiritual communities of a singular Dark night experience but this doesn't appear to be the case (at least within my personal experiences). Feels like more of a recurring event/process of letting go of the old (or dying to the illusions) and mourning what you've let go. In my journey, I've identified a number of false or limiting beliefs about myself, uncovered their origin and released them. I didn't understand why or how to describe it, but your post pretty much nails it; you're grieving the death of part of your ego/sense of self. In this awakening process, do you need to die to literally everything (your beliefs of yourself, your family, the world, existence, right and wrong, etc.) and mourn/grieve the death of these ideas? Is this grieving process ALWAYS part of transcendence or merely one component of letting go of illusion? I guess your level of attachment to a particular thing will determine how difficult it is to let go of and transcend it, and then how much mourning you need to do once you've realized the falsity of that particular thing.

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Wanna know what I did in my first dark night of the soul

 

Was early April '016. 

Started to freak out that this is the Almighty!, and in that fear at first... had a feeling of Vengeance, starting feeling I'm literally god, that god I followed from a little child. Had been a Christian priest initiated in the past.  

I went out on that late evening and many more after, singing from the home I was back then in Hatfield, N. London., to a park forest nearby. In the process, alone in the park started going into various states of what the mind cling too at that moment. Like being the infamous king of hell as well or many ideal caricatures followed in the next hours.  


... 7 rabbits will live forever.                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

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@Hellspeed lol, awesome story. You sang? I found that is the best technique for ego takeover as well (or any other manner of expression necessary away from distractions)

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5 hours ago, i am I AM said:

@Hellspeed lol, awesome story. You sang? I found that is the best technique for ego takeover as well (or any other manner of expression necessary away from distractions)

Singing is the most powerful tool one has to put harmony in the body/mind. But singing from the chakras, not only falsy singing. 


... 7 rabbits will live forever.                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

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But how do you go to work in dark night of the soul? :) 

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In my experience the Dark Night of The Soul waxes and wanes. Shortly after my spontaneous mystical experience I fell into it. I had to google information to even find out what I was going through, and still am. Nice to know I am not the only one. 

 

It feels a lot like being homesick as a child, even though my physical environment has not changed. Some days it is very bad, others not so much. External circumstances play no role in how I "feel". If I were instantly rich financially beyond my wildest dreams, it would not cure this, or even matter. I feel like I am just waiting for this life to end to enter the next. I have no goals here. This is not self pity. In no way do I feel sorry for my self. 

I still (somewhat passively) go to work at the business that I own, though I do see how it could be difficult for some. 

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14 hours ago, Nondescript said:

In my experience the Dark Night of The Soul waxes and wanes. Shortly after my spontaneous mystical experience I fell into it. I had to google information to even find out what I was going through, and still am. Nice to know I am not the only one. 

 

It feels a lot like being homesick as a child, even though my physical environment has not changed. Some days it is very bad, others not so much. External circumstances play no role in how I "feel". If I were instantly rich financially beyond my wildest dreams, it would not cure this, or even matter. I feel like I am just waiting for this life to end to enter the next. I have no goals here. This is not self pity. In no way do I feel sorry for my self. 

I still (somewhat passively) go to work at the business that I own, though I do see how it could be difficult for some. 

Do you do meditation or other practices?

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On 10/11/2018 at 0:52 AM, Buba said:

But how do you go to work in dark night of the soul?

Just remember that is all temporary, that state seems real but is not, so is not happening at all, you should remain all the time "this shall pass too"

 

There’s a famous fable of an ancient powerful king. As powerful as he was, he often struggled with emotional highs and lows, and that had caused him heavily during critical moments in battles.

The King was prone to periods of great elation where he would make very poor decisions, and periods of great despair where he would get extremely upset.

One of the kingdom’s wise men created a ring for the King, a device that would help stop him from getting lost in his high and low moments.

The King asked, “How does it work?”

“Wear the ring with you always. In times when you need it most, it will show you the answer and you will know what to do.” replied the wise man.

Almost immediately, a horseman rode in and demanded to speak to the King.

“Your Majesty! Your Majesty! The kingdom is surrounded. We’re under attacked!”

The King and all his best men rode out to meet their enemies in the battlefield. They fought for a long time and it appeared that they would be defeated.

Everything seemed dark and hopeless, just when the tired King was about to surrender the ring suddenly shined and caught his attention.

Engraved on the ring was an illuminated message – four words which he did not see before: “This too shall pass.”

All of the sudden, the King found new hope, courage and a burst of energy out of nowhere and fought back with everything he had. His new strength inspired his men to fight like never before, like men possessed. Soon, the tide of the battle turned and they won.

The King returned to his city and threw a massive celebration for many days. Just when he was losing himself in the midst of a great feast, the ring shined and there was an illuminated message which drew his attention.

This time it said, “This too shall pass.”

Those four words woke the King up and returned him to his centered self. He came back to his senses, he returned to clarity, which had always been there inside of him.

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Nice fable, I have heard something similar. :) 

I read reports on internet where people claimed that they had been experiencing dark night of the soul for years. It is so energy consuming and disabling, I wondered how people functioned in such a state.

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Headache, dizziness, nausea, fear, burning sensations.

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It has been more than 1 year:

Restlessness - Cannot relax, cannot focus, cannot sit for a long time without moving.

Fear - on and off, sometimes very intense as if I am going to lose my mind.

Depression - not so strong, but sometimes gets strong to the point I dont want to leave my bed.

Anxiety - all the time

Meaninglessness, depersonalization - sometimes.

Headaches, dizziness - sometimes.

So when I opened this topic I was in a very bad situation, all of the above-mentioned symptoms were very strong and constant. Therefore I stopped meditation and resumed to it after 5 months. So these symptoms are starting to get strong again. I work and if I get to that horrible point again like I did a year ago I will not be able to go to work. Is it possible to continue meditation, but to keep functionality? Is it possible to decrease meditation induced horror?

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@Buba I went through dark night of the soul. It last about 5 years. I have a few questions for you.

 

What does your life look like? Friends, job, hobbies, health habits?

 

How is your self-esteem?

 

What do you fear when you experience meditation induced horror?

 

Dark night is accompanied by extreme dissatisfaction and negativity. What is it about yourself and life that you don't like?

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On 2/13/2018 at 9:39 AM, Buba said:

I feel horrible emptiness and meaninglessness

Also known as depression. 

Talk to your doctor about how you're feeling. 

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10 hours ago, ivory said:

@Buba I went through dark night of the soul. It last about 5 years. I have a few questions for you.

 

What does your life look like? Friends, job, hobbies, health habits?

 

How is your self-esteem?

 

What do you fear when you experience meditation induced horror?

 

Dark night is accompanied by extreme dissatisfaction and negativity. What is it about yourself and life that you don't like?

I am not sure if it is dark night of the soul. Because I never had awakening. After several months of daily 20 minutes meditation (observing breath), I got severe depersonalization, derealization, meaninglessness, emptiness, fear and etc.

My life is overall good. I have friends whom I love and trust. I work, but dont like my work. I have hobbies, I like sport (though dont do it regularly). I quitted alcohol, cigarette in the end of 2017.

My self-esteem is very low.

I fear uncertainty. I fear I am losing my mind and will do something horrible or stupid. I also have fear of embarrassment. What if I do something weird and people will think I am weak.

I dont like myself. Because I think I am incomplete, a loser, who could not live the life he wanted. I have complex related to girls. I feel unwanted by them. 

10 hours ago, Gabriel Antonio said:

Also known as depression. 

Talk to your doctor about how you're feeling. 

I have been swallowing antidepressants for 5 years. So even before dark night I was suffering. But dark night is a bigger horror.

 

5 hours ago, Jkris said:

@Buba Take medication as well as physchotheraphy.

Medication does not help. Psychotherapy (I dont know if I ever took proper one) does not help.

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@Buba dont loose hope.defenitely medication combined with therapy should work.Take second opinion from some other Dr.

A kind of intriguing pain restlessness anxiety  ?

Any toxic shame guilt inferiority complex issues ?

Mostly it will be some sedative combined with mood enhancing medicines.

Take a small tour if possible along with your friends.Change your life style.Do some physical exercise.

Try to be mindful of the pain meaning with out resistance if possible.

@winterknight can suggest good therapist.

 

Edited by Jkris
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