Torkys

I'm falling off the path

15 posts in this topic

Where to begin?

Since 2 weeks ago, I have felt like I have no meditation to meditate (I have meditated almost every day for 6 months now) and to contemplate (this became my habit 3 months ago). I barely meditate now. I realized even though I have experienced the positive effects of mindfulness, higher consciousness and personal development (and this is the best path I have even explored), I still believe in it - subconsciously - and take the path of consciousness and self-actualization and take it for granted.

Quote

*hits blunt*. Holy shit! Question the FUCK out of personal development and self-actualization! Why consciousness? Why even a good life? - Maybe spend all of my spare time thinking about this shit? (quote from my daily reflection journal)

 

One night I contemplated this. I felt groundless. How do I continue a path that I just believe in and take for granted... Sure, it may be the hardest and "best" path of all, but I don't get this fully. I have a little fear of posting this because I think alot of people haven't faced this and I don't want to get biased answers. I decided to investigate this by contemplating these questions: What are the paths of humans? How to choose a path? I will continue my contemplation until I find answers.

What do you think about this? Any tips for sorting the "issue" out?

Edited by Torkys

Spirituality is any movement towards the Unnamable. Everything is spiritual.

The only true way out Resistance is going into it because any way out of it is staying in it.

The purest life possible is surrendering to the Absolute.

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It's just a part of the letting go. Not even the positive motivations will last when not coming from an authentic source. 

Maybe it's time to move on from your structured meditation/contemplation habits into a more intuitive one, where you simply meditate because you want to. Or contemplate because you really want to get to the bottom of this question you have, instead of doing it because that's what your schedule tells you to do.

I think you're still on the path. But at some point even that has to be let go of. But that's all part of the path. ;) You're embodying your freedom, which is indeed groundless. But that's a great place to be. Now you can find out what really moves you. Your signature says it all, really.

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Labeling is the thing that the mind got used to do to every thing, in order to save up energy. The mind is lazy. 

By labeling sitting without thoughts as "meditation" or as labeling the consciousness path as "the path", you create an image and certain feeling associated with the label. It's the same with prejudice, jews want money, americans are fat, but more subtly. Please see that everything in your life that has any meaning to you is labeled. (This is one of the concepts of Carl Jung btw, as I understand it at least)

The thing you're trying to do may be authentic to you in nature, but because of the label you see it as something else.

Try to contemplate what do you really like, what lead you to the path in the first place. Try to create a new label for the same thing, that has better feelings associated with it. Try different types of meditation. I would recommend concentration oriented practices, because if you really get them right, you will have a very pleasurable time meditating, im talking about better than orgasm. Every time I start a new meditation I seem like im doing everything from the start again, I feel like a newbie.

Try to meditate in a different place, meet other people who meditate, all that in order to change your label about it, which will give you motivation.

 

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Its ok to take a break. I dont consideer that falling off the track. I mean, are you quitting your job when you take a vacation? no!

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Are you passionate about improving your life and future?  What kind of vision do you have for your future?  Vision is what fuels passion.

Edited by Joseph Maynor

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@DoubleYou Thank you! :)

6 hours ago, DoubleYou said:

Maybe it's time to move on from your structured meditation/contemplation habits into a more intuitive one, where you simply meditate because you want to.

 

Aren't I supposed to meditate every single fucking day? The idea I like though, yess.

6 hours ago, DoubleYou said:

Your signature says it all, really.

Ironically, this insight came to me when I had an enlightenment-like experience. It was a time when I was into enlightenment which wasn't authentic, I didn't fathom the full consequences but I was like fckyeah, let's do this! :P

@Ilya Got it, "What are labels?" added to my contemplation topic list!

6 hours ago, Ilya said:

The thing you're trying to do may be authentic to you in nature, but because of the label you see it as something else.

Woah! That's right! Thanks!

7 hours ago, DoubleYou said:

Now you can find out what really moves you.

6 hours ago, Ilya said:

Try to contemplate what do you really like, what lead you to the path in the first place.

I need to do heavy work on this. Thank you, guys! :)


Spirituality is any movement towards the Unnamable. Everything is spiritual.

The only true way out Resistance is going into it because any way out of it is staying in it.

The purest life possible is surrendering to the Absolute.

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@Joseph Maynor

5 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

Are you passionate about improving your life and future?

It's a mere preference.

5 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

What kind of vision do you have for your future?

I have a faint, non-compelling vision of becoming something along the lines of a sage. I need to do heavy work on vision, passion, as I said earlier.

 


Spirituality is any movement towards the Unnamable. Everything is spiritual.

The only true way out Resistance is going into it because any way out of it is staying in it.

The purest life possible is surrendering to the Absolute.

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4 minutes ago, Torkys said:

@Joseph Maynor

It's a mere preference.

I have a faint, non-compelling vision of becoming something along the lines of a sage. I need to do heavy work on vision, passion, as I said earlier.

 

You might look into doing some Life Purpose work.

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Keep calm and carry on. This is MASTERY we are talking about. You're just on a plateau.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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@Leo Gura Why is this a metaphorical plateau?


Spirituality is any movement towards the Unnamable. Everything is spiritual.

The only true way out Resistance is going into it because any way out of it is staying in it.

The purest life possible is surrendering to the Absolute.

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@Torkys Watch my older Mastery video.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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@Torkys I see several problems here over and over meditation is treated like a chore. They only practice one kind of meditation . They take on 5-20 practices at a time then when they feel overwhelmed , bored and frustrated. Then they  slide ,slide and slide-down. I rather help you succeed than watch you fail.

I can understand going back to sleep or taking break it happens especially when crazy traumatic shit happens that overwhelms  your entire being. this happened to me  so i can relate.

That is not what I see here for the most part though.

 

 Creativity is the joy of life variety is the spice.

In meditation do 30 minuets minimum a day.  Change it up do different kindsone hour is all you need minimum 30 minuets

If you want to do more than one practice that is fine but you should start with no more than 3.   Stabilize those become proficient and explore them from different standpoints find ways to make them interesting.  No one wants to be bored to death.

Stop looking at actualize.org like a all you can eat buffet. Stop binge watching 5-20 videos. 

Ask yourself what are the 3 things that I Most want help with or that I want to change?  Then make those your 3 Practices that  answer to that question. I strongly encourage your first one to be meditation because if you can not calm you mind on some level and acquire some awareness everything will be harder.

Take notes : How will I incorporate this into MY life successfully ?

Take subconscious resistance into account, Your mind has been programed Aka "brainwashed" from birth"  to be lazy  to have others think for you and force you into the idea that you are separate limited being.  These programs  to do everything to stop you from being or ever gaining awareness to see this very fact.   That is just the truth . News ,advertising ,tv shows ,video games , the education system , culture in general enforce and reinforce this over and over until the patterns and habits you hold to are not even your own.  Realize that it takes 40 days to establish a habit by repeatedly doing  over and over until that habit is pushed into your subconscious as a rule to supersede previous shitty behavior. You better believe there will be resistance from your mind.  Know it, expect it ,and plan for it.

Stop caring what others think or if they are on the same level as you. or who is more enlightened. There is always someone doing better than you and worse. I person in the process of life long enlightenment helps those that are doing worse and asks for help from those that they know have surpassed them. 

Understand that you could be wrong and if you see shitty behavior realize after the fact accept and make amends for it. Then do better. All things in life can be a mirror If you can get out of your own way. 

This is just a rule am implementing  When a person poses a comment that has nothing to do with a topic and you want to respond to them don't do it on the thread copy there statement and post it to them in mail. That will stop topics from being derailed and it addresses the comment directly to them. 

 

Sorry if this post went a bit off topic but sometimes that is how my chaotic mind  "thought process works"

At any rate I hope you find it helpful

Edited by Source_Mystic

I no longer advocate, participate, condone, or support  actualized.org or Leo Gura in anyway. The reasons are left in the few post I left behind. 

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14 hours ago, Torkys said:

What are the paths of humans? How to choose a path

I was told by a "wise person" or so i feel like he was wise that eveyone has their own journey/path.


Real eyes, realize, real lies.

 

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