Being A Nondual Snob

[Forestluv]

Thank you all for your comments. I’m seeing this behavior from another perspective.

(I would like to mention: I am not like this ALL the time, yet it is a habit I’d like to let go of).

Edited November 9, 2017 by Serotoninluv

[Forestluv]

@vizual I love this analogy and I experienced it with her last week. I was lightly tripping and not overly thinking like I normally do. I noticed how our conversation was flowing between us. Ideas and concepts merging together and developing. I felt like we were out at a concert. . . It also brought to my attention how my over-thinking disrupts this flow (e.g. while she is talking, I am developing my own concept and thinking about how I am going to explain it).

@YaNanNallari Points taken thank you. I'd just like to mention that this is not my normal manner of communication, it is only occasional blips (perhaps one comment like this for every 8hrs we are together). 

[Leo Gura]

Serotoninluv's GF: "Honey, I love you."

Serotoninluv: *slaps her across the face* "WAKE UP! There is no you or me! There is only Buddha-nature, and it loves all equally."

[Nahm]

@Serotoninluv you've got the clarity & distinctions, and you have them all up in your head.    you get to live it now, you lucky SOB.  They are your experience, right now, right in front of you. The One that you are, she is that same One.  Right in front of you.    walking and talking. Right in front of you. 

 

[Epiphany_Inspired]

@Serotoninluv My personal experience is that non-dual stuff somehow/ often becomes snobby....here are some examples:

I found an actual *non-dual club* near me...I thought: how fucking cool is that?...how awesome to have other people to chat with about this stuff....I recently emailed them to ask if my four year old can come to a meeting (she comes to all sorts of things and can usually entertain herself with the occasional snack etc)...after months of sending me their cool videos, articles, and insights (that I really enjoyed), they blocked my email address just for asking! (Maybe it was an inappropriate request, but I'm a single parent, they could have just said no)....but whatever...

Often....when I am talking to super linear/ dual/ seemingly-closed-minded-ish folks (usually friends of friends) and for me....the conversation is pointless if I make a valueless statement or randomly agree...especially when non-duality could easily explain the phenomenon, or political thing, or whatever it is...in a truth based sense...but any attempt to infuse even the tiniest morsel of non-dual thought into one of these conversations turns me into an instant snob...

I think perhaps that we have to accept that it may be like speaking an unknown language...perhaps there is a way to really simplify our non-dual perspectives...so that even if our words are not absorbed or comprehended in the way we intend....at least perhaps...we may sound less snobby...I don't know....although this is not in the dating section...what may reconcile the differences in duality w/ dating is to maybe add some recognition of the experience you seem to be having in this body (sensations etc) and acknowledge them out loud in addition to your other truths?...I don't know...

[Extreme Z7]

On 11/9/2017 at 2:00 PM, Wind said:

Or... savoring the moment in silence as you breath in deeply, look at her/your eyes and smile.

Yep. . .

[Nahm]

On 11/9/2017 at 1:00 AM, Wind said:

Or... savoring the moment in silence as you breath in deeply, look at her/your eyes and smile.

?❤️

[Source_Mystic]

On 11/8/2017 at 11:09 AM, Serotoninluv said:

Over the past few months, I've had some glimpses of what seem to be described as nondual. My body and mind seem to be moving in this direction. At times, it's been awkward having a nondual perspective around people with a dual perspective. Yet since I've lived my whole life dual, that's my default and where I naturally go when I'm around co-workers, people in the supermarket etc. 

A few weeks ago I started dating a gal who has casual interest in personal development, meditation, yoga etc. I've noticed she is a bit of a "coffee snob". She only drinks high quality coffee. She knows all about different types of coffees and likes to *over-share* her knowledge. In a similar way, I've noticed that I can be a bit of a "nondual snob", in which I *over-share*. Examples:

Her: Look at those clouds. Aren't they beautiful?

Me: When you define them as clouds and beautiful you are saying that they are not something else. That separates them from every-thing. They are not separate, they just are.

Her: I enjoyed spending time with you today. That was fun.

Me: Time is a concept. There is only the present moment. Those thoughts and memories are just a story within a dream. The only reality is right here in this present moment.

Her: I'm interested in learning more about you. Tell me a bit about yourself.

Me: Well, there is the true "me" and the illusionary self. Generally, the term "you" is used in the context of the illusionary self. This self illusion is merely a projection of thoughts and bodily sensations. That "self" doesn't exist through time. The true "me" is within infinite consciousness in this moment in time.

At times, we've had some introspective conversations in which these thoughts seem appropriate. Yet other times, she says a lighthearted comment or question and I ruin the moment by pulling out this nondual snobbery. It just doesn't go with the flow and it's a killjoy. A few times her facial expression is like: "huh??. . . ok, whatever. . . ".

I'd like to connect with someone in the actualization area, yet I'd also like to learn how to express it without forcing it and disrupting the flow of events.

 

Understanding nonduality is one thing ?

 I understand your statements from that point view but you can not talk to everyday people like that ,  unless they are specifically wanting to understand nonduality. Every conversation does not have to be a extensional dialog to convert everyone to nonduality.

Nonduality is just one facet of reality. Explore More Learn more. Move forward

How about move on to the next thing awareness of the present moment without thought.

Or you could try to understand perception and how it colors our experiences.  

See nonduality is not about separating yourself or putting yourself higher in any regard it is about the fundamental unity and connection of all things namely oneness.

Qualitative arguments on what things are defined as are  really missing the point. That is for you and your inner work. But you have to be careful you do not fall into the trap of definition though language. Work on awareness in the present moment. 

 

 

 

Edited November 13, 2017 by Source_Mystic

[Lorcan]

On 11/8/2017 at 5:09 PM, Serotoninluv said:

 

Her: Look at those clouds. Aren't they beautiful?

Me: When you define them as clouds and beautiful you are saying that they are not something else. That separates them from every-thing. They are not separate, they just are.

Her: I enjoyed spending time with you today. That was fun.

Me: Time is a concept. There is only the present moment. Those thoughts and memories are just a story within a dream. The only reality is right here in this present moment.

Her: I'm interested in learning more about you. Tell me a bit about yourself.

Me: Well, there is the true "me" and the illusionary self. Generally, the term "you" is used in the context of the illusionary self. This self illusion is merely a projection of thoughts and bodily sensations. That "self" doesn't exist through time. The true "me" is within infinite consciousness in this moment in time.

Wait? Actualized.org memes? 

They exist?????????????

BUT LEO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edited November 14, 2017 by Lorcan

[Joseph Maynor]

Makes sense because you are in the field of education and that is your forte.  It's a trap that your profession is probably inclined towards: Need to know.  And then there is the need to prove that you know.  Especially to your fellow know-it-all colleagues.  It's normal.  The knowledge professions are prone to certain traps.  Every profession has its traps.  

In the legal profession it's not knowledge per se that is of value, it's needing to prove that you are competent and that you won't be treated like a chump.  So, in the legal profession, there is a lot of ego traps around these issues like various macro and micro-aggressions, rudeness, posturing, poker-faced sneakiness, gossipy backbiting.  In law, nobody gives a shit what you know unless it can be translated into money or utility somehow.  Knowing for the sake of knowing is not valued in law, so we don't have the same kind of know-it-allism that academics have.  It's all about how you translate your knowledge into cash that is of value in law.  Law is a business, and the only academics are not lawyers, they work in universities.

It's interesting how your profession frames you.  It's inevitable.  If you study enlightenment, the world looks like enlightenment.  If you study law, you see the world through the lens of law.  If you study medicine, I'm sure you see life differently, etc.

Edited November 15, 2017 by Joseph Maynor