First Experience Of Deep Insight

[zenjen]

So, it finally clicked for me. The fact that we are all the same energy, like apples that fall from the same tree. Everything in nature is this same energy too, at varied levels of consciousness. I was awakened to the fact that my body is basically just a machine, like Leo has said in his videos. For a long time, I had believed this was possibly true but never really felt or experienced it. I feel like this insight is huge and I am blown away by how much better I have felt for the past 2 days.

Just months ago, I was in so much psychological pain I was putting a gun up to my head and turning the safety on and off, desperate to escape and feeling so confused. I feel like I’ve had glimpse of what it’s like to be truly happy, so what I fear now is losing this insight. I don’t want to go back to the way I was. I want to keep seeing myself in everyone, I love it. I believe some of the people on this forum must have had an experience like this. What did you do after this realization? How should I continue from here?

[Nahm]

@zenjen the first thing you do is get the guns out of your house. Get them back later when you're stable. 

Then start focusing on what you want. Don't focus on fear or you'll experience more of it. 

Congrats on the breakthrough!!!

Write on a piece of paper right now. Write down how you feel. Describe it as much as you can. Write down how you feel about the future, etc. 

Look at that piece of paper every morning. It will help you keep that state of mind going.

Good luck man!!! 

Please talk to the forum, or message me, or anyone, in the future, instead of the gun thing. 

Also, call them, they are highly trained. It's highly likely they lost someone and that is what led them to that job. They are there because they want to help you. 

 

 

Edited September 15, 2017 by Nahm

[zenjen]

@Nahm The gun is locked away now. I included that bit of information to emphasize how big of a deal this is to me and encourage others who are suffering to keep their faith alive.

I will be sure to write out my insights in detail, Thank you for the kind words

[ajasatya]

@zenjen nice!

after my first deep insight i started to work on my emotional barriers. making deep eye contact, talking to girls with a relaxed body, hugging without malice. it's a painful and happy journey!

oh, i also started working on my body with the help of skillful yoga teachers. being alive feels very good now

[Leo Gura]

@zenjen It's only the beginning. You can be pretty sure your high will burst, and new lows will come. So watch out and pace yourself. Just keep doing the work. Things will improve over time.

Sell your stupid gun before you hurt somebody with it.

[Nahm]

@zenjen ??

[The Monk]

@zenjen Good job! Keep pushing forward and learning more experiencing more of this magical universe we live in. The insights and experiences are infinite, so remember that.  But remain mindful of when the profound experience ends. Because that's when the ego begins to backlash and come back stronger and weird things MAY start happening. Also sell the damn gun. But remain on the path and  you will have the ability to continually come back to this godly experience. And experience it for greater lengths of time, than you already do!

[zenjen]

@Leo Gura @The Monk

Unfortunately, the stupid gun isn’t mine to sell, or else I would have got rid of it before that even happened. I know it is in a lock box now, but I have no clue where it is at the moment.

I will heed your warning. I realize my psyche is still healing, so I am still being cautious in my actions as to not over-exert myself. My ego thought pattern is strong and I don’t expect it to go away too easily.

Upon reflection, I think what happened was that I was able to really distance my self from my identity for the first time. Continually telling myself to “surrender to this moment” is helping to keep up my awareness for now. I have also been able to see the “point” of doing meditation more clearly, so more meditating is my first order of business.

Edited September 16, 2017 by zenjen

[Extreme Z7]

@zenjen Do Nothing Technique is a very good way to maintain spiritual insights and positive states. Although it is a paradoxical method. Essentially you have to completely let go of all desire and intention to control your mind, body, and external circumstances. Basically, you should be able to allow yourself to feel suicidal again and be okay with it.

If you feel good, you make no intention to try to maintain it. If you feel bad, you make no intention to try to change anything. If things do change, that's fine, make no intention to try to maintain any states.

[zenjen]

@Extreme Z7 thank you, I feel like I looked evil in the face and the evil was me. I'm still learning to let go of fear and accept that it's not that scary. I'm not that scary, just misunderstood. I feel like I have a better understanding of that now and it's helping me cope with the onslaught of emotions.

[zenjen]

Dagnabbit @Leo Gura you are at it again! that new video is exactly what I needed right now

Edited September 18, 2017 by zenjen