bebotalk

Fighting back

163 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

@Basman Not only is he emotionally reactive, and easily triggered.

He says they are his enemies, what do you think about that?

What would you say to a man who hates attractive women, and says they are his enemies?

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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10 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Basman Not only is he emotionally reactive, and easily triggered.

He says they are his enemies, what do you think about that?

What would you say to a man who hates attractive women, and says they are his enemies?

Get help.

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@Basman 🫶🏼


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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@bebotalk Your problem is not with hot women. It's with the simps who suck up to these hot women. They are who you have real danger from. Without simps, hot women have no power to hurt you. 

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Lol this thread :D


Those you do not forgive you fear. 

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Posted (edited)

1 hour ago, mr_engineer said:

@bebotalk Your problem is not with hot women. It's with the simps who suck up to these hot women. They are who you have real danger from. Without simps, hot women have no power to hurt you. 

What does simps have to do with HIS mind? His hate? His thoughts? His pain? His perception?

Nothing at all. 
 

I love this man because I love myself.

I love my brothers and sisters. 
 

I see beyond their nightmares, their conflicts, their poor behaviour and I see God in them. Their goodness. I meet myself and others with forgiveness.
 

It’s not the simps, it’s not Hot women. It’s his mind, his thoughts, what he has learned, his inner conflict, his fear, his lack of self image, self worth and self love.

Luckily, all of that can be worked on. 
 

These interactions likely aren’t as they were. His story telling and perception is distorting what actually happened, and what an appropriate response is. 

If you need to attack, yell, ridicule, punch, do harm, be aggressive, etc… your way way off the mark and it’s a true sign you are living in a nightmare.

 

You can’t control other men, or other women. 
 

But, you can work on seeing the truth that reality is kind. The mind is good. There is sexual abundance.

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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Posted (edited)

24 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

What does simps have to do with HIS mind? His hate? His thoughts? His pain? His perception?

Nothing at all. 

It might be his last desperate fighting spirit before giving up and becoming a simp. 

edit: An attempt to understand his perspective. 

Edited by Jannes

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Posted (edited)

@Jannes I don't understand that. Him hating women and him being a simp? Are they related? They seem like Yin and Yang of unskillful interaction with what we want in live.

Do we bow and beg and be a weak man for sex and affection?

Or do we attack, hate, reject, yell, demonize and feel anger towards our objects of desire?

What, what if there was another way?

There is,... It start's with seeking truth, forgiving yourself and others, and building yourself into a man of quality, strength, integrity, balance, value, honesty, playfulness, relaxation, joyfulness, sexually healthy and willing to change. 

 

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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He called the thread "fighting back" But really, he is fighting himself. 


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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2 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Jannes I don't understand that. Him hating women and him being a simp? Are they related? They seem like Yin and Yang of unskillful interaction with what we want in live.

We sometimes act in opposite ways to our to our natural self to cover up weaknesses. 

2 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

Do we bow and beg and be a weak man for sex and affection?

Or do we attack, hate, reject, yell, demonize and feel anger towards our objects of desire?

What, what if there was another way?

There is,... It start's with seeking truth, forgiving yourself and others, and building yourself into a man of quality, strength, integrity, balance, value, honesty, playfulness, relaxation, joyfulness, sexually healthy and willing to change. 

 

Obviously but if he knew or could do that then he wouldn't come up with this. It's just an attempt to understand his perspective. I didn't make that clear. 

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Posted (edited)

@Jannes People go through things. He shared it on the forum for a reason.

He may not see is potential right now, he may see enemies in what he wants.

But, give him some months and years and he can come around. 

I see the potential in him.

Ah, I see you trying to understand him. Thats a good point really.

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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33 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

What does simps have to do with HIS mind? His hate? His thoughts? His pain? His perception?

Nothing at all. 

There is a social reality, that when you get into a fight with a hot woman, the hot woman will win. Why? She has simps siding with her. 

This can make it seem like hot women have all the power in the world. When, in reality, it's the simps enabling it. 

If you find a way to hold the simps accountable, you won't be so intimidated by hot women. 

37 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

I see beyond their nightmares, their conflicts, their poor behaviour and I see God in them. Their goodness. I meet myself and others with forgiveness.
 

It’s not the simps, it’s not Hot women. It’s his mind, his thoughts, what he has learned, his inner conflict, his fear, his lack of self image, self worth and self love.

Luckily, all of that can be worked on. 
 

These interactions likely aren’t as they were. His story telling and perception is distorting what actually happened, and what an appropriate response is. 

If you need to attack, yell, ridicule, punch, do harm, be aggressive, etc… your way way off the mark and it’s a true sign you are living in a nightmare.

Something's probably happened in his past and the point of the aggression is to defend against that thing happening in the future. 

What I am trying to get him to see, is that a lot of the rules around 'you should treat women with respect' and 'put women on a pedestal' and stuff like that have not been set by women themselves. They've been set by simps!! So, if you have an issue with following these rules, your fight is not against hot women, it's against simps. 

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Posted (edited)

@mr_engineer Do you think that generally, people man or woman should be treated with respect?

I see what you mean. Perhaps these women think they are above men, perhaps because so many men are in their DMs etc, and simps prop up their egos. Also, there is some toxic female culture that exists. You are right this should also be addressed.

How do you know what women really think of themselves?

Each girl is different and unique.

I have met women, who think they are above me and I know the pain that exists in these situations. I have been angry towards women as well, and I have made similar mistakes.

However, I know that the man I am, the man I am becoming doesn't need to attack, demonize or turn them into enemies. 

Again, when it comes to working with women... being playful, light hearted, being grounded in your centre, coming from a place of abundance, etc... Women are naturally attracted to these things.

Do we need to punish these women for having an ego? No.

Don't hurt them. If you aren't attracted to them that is fine. 

But, you are a man. Not a fucking child who throws tantrums.

It's not her job to be nice to you, to suck your dick, to bow to you, she's and individual person and probably doesn't know you. People are selfish in general. Part of life is dealing with the selfishness of others in a skillful way.

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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Just now, Thought Art said:

Do you think that generally, people man or woman should be treated with respect?

Well, we're not talking about me here, we're talking about OP. And, if he wants to be sexist, that's his choice. 

What we can do, though, is point out that it's not productive and what would be a more productive way of solving his problems. (And not just our projection of what 'his problems' are, actually looking at his definition of 'his problems with women' and showing him the solutions)

5 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

I see what you mean. Perhaps these women think they are above men, perhaps because so many men are in their DMs etc, and simps prop up their egos. Also, there is some toxic female culture that exists. You are right this should also be addressed.

How do you know what women really think of themselves?

I have met women, who think they are above me and I know the pain that exists in these situations. I have been angry towards women as well, and I have made similar mistakes.

However, I know that the man I am, the man I am becoming doesn't need to attack, demonize or turn them into enemies. 

Again, when it comes to working with women... being playful, light hearted, being grounded in your centre, coming from a place of abundance, etc... Women are naturally attracted to these things.

Do we need to punish these women for having an ego? No.

Don't hurt them. If you aren't attracted to them that is fine. 

But, you are a man. Not a fucking child who throws tantrums.

Obviously, women aren't the problem. No matter how toxic they get, we shouldn't blame them for our problems. 

OP does have some aggression, though. If channeled in the right direction, it would actually get him somewhere! 

It does pay him to see that these rules have been set by simps. And that simps suck with women! So, the question arises - how should you treat women? And, who should be given the right to answer this question? 

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Posted (edited)

@mr_engineer Yes, not you sorry if it read that way. I don't mean YOU, specifically. I mean, OP, and also us, and also men in general.

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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@mr_engineer I don't really think these "rules" exist. Most women I meet are very sweet.

Some, are of course more selfish than others. But, thats why you should talk to 1,500 women instead of playing video games all day.


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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12 hours ago, Raze said:

Some youtube gurus, who probably don't practice what they preach? people have beliefs. some are good, others are bad. it's what it is. Some sheltered and spoilt Buddhist-esque guru should step out of their temple or see the wider world. or not be blinded and hypocritical. For instance, in many societies, bigotry is accepted. This is why in much of Asia and Africa, there is extreme anti-LGBT sentiment. Humanity isn't perfect. we can strive for betterment, of course. However, it doesn't mean we cannot see things for what they are. To change anything acknowledges seeing the reality. 

I dont' like fake and blinded people. I'm not such. I say and see things as I genuinely see them. These YouTubers are disingenuous and blinded. 

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5 hours ago, Lila9 said:

There is something deeper that causes your obsessive-compulsive hatred of beautiful women. It seems like your obsessive hatred is consuming a lot of energy from you.

You think that by hating beautiful women with passion, you hurt them in some way. No, you don't, but you do hurt yourself.

Your anger and negative emotions are eating you alive, you punish yourself at the end of the day.

I don't hurt them, and I don't wish to, really. I just know their nature. So I defend myself from them. they've spent decades plotting against me, to deny me normalcy, so I despise them all. everywhere. and people have prejudices. I'm a human. i accept I'm imperfect. i don't believe people who say they are all light. they then would condone racism by saying "Everybody is a little bit racist" (I'm not) or "people gotta a right to be racist!!" (I agree, in principle). 

It's society that says we're all equal. if so, and it's not just some crap that pretty women started to muddy the waters or throw a cat amongst the pigeons, then there is no logical reason why i must view pretty women as "better". i refuse to. 

And a human has every right to counter people who are harmful. self-defence is basic. 

 

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Yes, this thread is intended to "help me". whilst I didn't ask for help, I guess I should be grateful in some sense.

I don't care if I seem repetitive. I don't post for others' entertainment. people can filter shit. we learn that as toddlers, even as babies. people don't act for others' benefit. it is what it is. 

 

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Posted (edited)

Your feelings and experiences of dislike/anger/being treated poorly/annoyance are valid. It's just important to recognize that everyone has a complex world inside and deserves the withholding of assumptions and given a baseline of respect they deserve from being a growing human being, no matter their physical appearance. Everyone is flawed in various ways from how they grew up and how others have treated them, which trickles down to how they view and treat themselves, and it takes a lot of time for people to grow into their authenticity and drop what society expects of them or taught them. It's normal and very human to feel annoyed at entire groups of people, or just want to avoid them/they aren't your cup of tea. But if taken too far it can also be dangerous, hurtful projections on others, black and white thinking, can distort what is a closer version of reality, etc. Leaving a little window of empathy despite the anger and them not being your cup of tea, remembering that everyone has similar feelings and sometimes cries at night in the same way that every human does, helps remember the humanity in yourself and others.

,,,What I'm trying to say is, that it sounds dangerous to yourself and others to think, 'I hate her.' Towards a pretty woman you do not know. A more open thought might be something like 'I am wary of her. I've had bad experiences with pretty women in the past. But I wonder what she is like and what her world is like.' 

If you feel unhappy at a pretty woman for asking for directions in an unpleasant manner, who knows what kind of day she has been going through, if she is reacting to a mildly grumpy expression from you, or if her unpleasantness is caused by other factors than how she looks

I'm sure having high beauty comes with its own difficulties, such as being objectified and not being seen by others as the person they truly are inside. Do you know of any women artists, authors, singers out there that you deem as having both kind hearted/depthful qualities and are also very pretty? Maybe it would be helpful to search for the people who surprise your expectations. It's easy imo to overlook these things if your reality has been painted with bad experience, and then only see the bad, since negative feelings can be much louder than positive ones. 

 

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Edited by Myioko

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