egoeimai

Member
 View profile  See their activity

  • Content count

    2,692

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by egoeimai

  9. Posted

    Hi. As you fantasize them you are building this image which later you'll experience it's not true. Do you want to feel like crap facing reality? No.

    Only if you never meet them and do nothing with them you can keep fantasizing about them because it will cause nothing and it will be only a thought/feeling pattern which you can use as a distraction from the awful world we live in and then yeah it will be a great tool. 

     

  17. Posted

    Hey bitchez,

    So... I was wondering If you actually need a reason to go after a goal. They say this cliché that you always need a reason, a purpose, a plan.

    It seems logical, because techniques like visualisation or just thinking about the end-goal-the reason will help you go through the hard stuff. Your mind needs something to hold on to.

    But what if you don't need a reason? 

    Personally, I'm stuck at thinking about a bunch of different scenarios as to why I should do it and end up thinking too much to the point I find obstacles everywhere. One positive thought=many negative ones that sabotage my reason.

    And I'm just tired of this. I'll never find a good reason in order to take action. I will always wait for the effing reason. I don't want to waste more time.

     No reason is a good reason for me to start. I'm tired of searching. I'm thinking about going without one. Needing a reason is an excuse for me. I got it. My mind thinks it needs a reason, the reason cannot be found, so this is neverending. I'll try doing it for no reason and update you if I remember to. I'm feeling lighter already. Anyhow, life is unknowable so the reason must be as well.

  22. Posted

    Anxious /

    Preoccupied

    The anxious/preoccupied attachment style (referred to as ambivalent in children) is created in the first 18 months of life, in a dyad with the primary caregiver, usually the mother or the father.

     

    The roots of this attachment style are based in perceived neglect: the parents did not necessarily neglect the child actively, but the child perceived that his or her needs were not met.

     

    Growing up, people with this attachment style start to neglect their own needs and to put the needs of others first. They expect that, if they are nice and caring to someone, he or she will like them and take care of them in return. This turns into preoccupation with the needs of others and leads to lack of self-definition and sense of self.

     

     

    Score Mother/CG1: Anxiety: 2.67 | Avoidance: 4.33

     

    Score Father/CG2: Anxiety: 6.33 | Avoidance: 6.67

     

    Score Partner: Anxiety: 6.67 | Avoidance: 3.33

     

     

    Common signs of your attachment style include:

    Please keep in mind that, even if you have this attachment style, you don’t need to identify with all of the characteristics outlined below. Remember, everybody has a unique personality and life experience.

     

    You lack a strong sense of self and tend to put others first. You take care of others and place more importance on them and their needs, instead of on yourself and your needs.

    You have a hard time being alone; you crave relationships and intimacy.

    You have a relatively low self-esteem and seek approval and reassurance from others – you need them to validate your own worth. Therefore, you often crave attention and try to impress people.

    When it comes to relationships, you often exhibit clingy and needy behaviors. You seek attention and intimacy and can become too demanding. On the other hand, you are sensitive towards your partner’s needs and preoccupied with taking care of them, which might cause your partner to feel smothered or suffocated by you.

    You fear that you will scare people away and that they will reject, criticize, or abandon you. You can get extremely upset when you receive disapproval (in any form). When your partner is unavailable and spends time away from your relationship, you can become jealous, frustrated, and resentful.

    You overanalyze and worry excessively about relationships. At the same time, you easily ignore or misread signs of relational issues