Spence94

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Posts posted by Spence94


  1. I think it makes sense it is one of the causes. We are in part a product of our childhood conditioning.

    Power = energy

    Powerlessness= low energy

    This energy gets suppressed by the various ways that in our childhood our energy is blocked from being allowed to flow freely. 

    Without energy we feel powerless. With energy we feel power. 

    The energy blockages manifest in the from of suffering and emotional-mental narratives that keep us in conflict with ourselves and therefore feeling stuck.


  2. I've travelled solo a lot and lived in multiple foreign countries where I moved there alone. I think it can be a very good way to discover yourself, grow and expand your mind. 

    You feel your ego, worldview and paradigms getting broken down when you expose yourself to other cultures and languages. Traveling and especially living in another country really forced me to grow up.


  3. @selfvalley You need to investigate what this urge to tell them to fuck off is and what this sense of hurt and upset at peoples judgments and criticism of you is. Perhaps there are experiences in your childhood that have left this anger in you. A present moment mindset shift probably won't last, you need to investigate the trigger. Once you shine awareness on the source, changing the attitude will be much easier. Until then, you'll keep slipping back into being triggered and telling em to fuck off. 

    As for a motive, ask yourself, how do you honestly feel when you tell people who have hurt you to fuck off? Does the sense of pleasure it provides last? Is there suffering associated with this attachment and trigger?If there is, do you want to keep suffering? Do you want to keep potentially making other people suffer with your rage?

     


  4. Lately I'm realizing that most of my inability to make changes is due to my lack of emotional mastery. Lack of daily emotional awareness that gets me bogged down. Emotional blockages and traumas that are trapping me in repetitive psychological patterns of behavior that leave me spinning in circles. I know what you mean about understanding things like awareness alone is curative and learning is behavior change but then not getting anywhere. 

    It's the emotions I think, the lack of awareness and management and the lack of work done on the suppressed emotions that are trapping all your energy and potential and just weighing you down no matter how much Actualized.org you listen too. 


  5. Alan Carrs Easy way to quit smoking.

    I smoked 10-20 a day for 9 years. Read the book mutliple times. Haven't had a toke of a cigarette in 6 and half a years. The guy who wrote it was a chain smoking banker who smoked for decades then quit over night once he suddenly woke upto the insights in the book and saw through the nicotine addiction illusion.

    Worked for me. Could work for you. You need a strong desire to quit though. I gave the book to multiple friends, some of them quit too, some of them just didn't read the book or read half the book then stopped reading because the reality of having the 'final cigarette' and never smoking ever again created fear in their minds. They still smoke.

    Good luck.


  6. On 23/03/2022 at 8:40 PM, Ya know said:

    He differs from Christ because his teaching is ''I can of my own self do nothing, the father within doeth the works''

    I don't think they differ much based on this quote. The buddha taught theres no self in control and that by realizing that 'you' paradoxically gain control but it's like psuedo control where you're kinda watching the show unfold and not being absorbed and attached to it as if you are the one in the movie. Buddha didn't refer to this seeing and knowing as the 'father' but this he pointed towards this center as the source of of creation. 


  7. 2 hours ago, puporing said:

    What I've discovered is that it's not just about those things. You are prob vibrating on a different plane than most, and thus ideally you want to find someone also vibrating on that plane. This may be one of the reasons it seems harder for you than it may be for others - and the many rejections and heartbreaks. It is not just a matter of external factors. The thing is even if you did get a sweet or hot girl lets say, if you don't vibrate on a similar plane it won't feel very good for long. But that's just my experience. Maybe you'd be good with just a relief for once.

    I also think there is truth in this statement. Different wavelengths often make things difficult.

    Inner growth will greatly effect your dating and relationship life both in the sense it will make you incompatible with many women but will also allow you to be more authentically attractive and attract compatible partners. I think overall the benefits of internal growth for yourSelf and your relationships outweigh the drawbacks of also being incompatible with the majority of people you meet. 


  8. I mainly want to do work on my past. I think I am a 'novice'/ 'newbie' in that area of work, I have never really looked into my past and feel the unconcious patterns are holding me back. I don't know to what extend I am traumatized or to what extent I just need a better understanding and application of basic self development in this area. I dunno. Lol. Someone offered me the course for free so I'll check it out anyways, maybe deeper work needs to be done elsewhere.


  9. @RttPtt I reccomend ditching anything that includes English in the material, especially for Chinese. You need as much total immersion with the language as possible. The only way is to give your brain the opportunity to get used to the language, which is done through immersion. Immersion doesn't have to be 24/7 it can be an hour or 2 or 3, but it needs to be just Chinese. Personally duolingo and ChinesePod didn't work for me.

    I use LingQ.Com and Refold.la

    There whole premise is immersion through reading and listening to native materials not learner materials.  LingQ has a wealth of resources for all levels and is really fun to use. Refold is basically a philosophy of how to use real native TV shows and movies to develop native level listening comprehension in a foreign language. They're both very fun and satisfying approaches.

    I live in China, so I use AQIY and Tenecent video, they are Chinas version of Netflix basically, they have more than enough Chinese tv shows and movies. I don't know if you can access it abroad though, give it a try. It only costs me £1.50 a month.

    With enough Input, speaking comes easy....easier at least, pronunciation in Chinese certainly takes a lot of practice, but with enough input you won't be searching and struggling for words and you'll be able to understand the other person, which is 50% of  conversation. 90% of Chinese words only have 2 syllables, and the phonetics don't really deviate from the syllable patterns like they do in most other languages, so actually the pronunciation is much easier than people think, the tones are tricky though. I fuck the tones up all the time still.

    Steve Kaufman says " you've just gotta get a feel for the rythm of Chinese and allow the listening input to 'infect' you with the language."

    Biggest thing though for Chinese is to let go of English, only use it for getting the meaning of words initially, don't bother with explanations and analysis of Chinese in English. The meaning of Chinese is in the Chinese language itself. 


  10. Organifi Gold. It will knock you out and you'll wake up calm and energized and it will carry through the day. It's so potent I only use half a spoon each cup, (that way a tub will last 60 days instead of 30 too, so you'll save money.) Add it to hot water and drink like a tea. Tastes good as well. Super calming and relaxing. Its magical.

    20220309_223551.jpg


  11. I see networking as collaborations on projects,  actually expanding your client base through in person interactions that actually lead to sales, opportunities and collaborations. Having your network of clients or collaborators expanded through word of mouth referrals or by directly connecting with you online, or you connecting with them.

    Things that actually increase your sales, clients or business opportunities.

    Offering value to people upfront such as free services and products.

    Going to a wine mixer or expat bar and exchanging social media contacts whilst getting drunk doesn't seem to be that effective. lol. A lot of expats try to start service based businesses in Asia but often fail to build much traction.

    My life coach said 80% of his client networks comes from word of mouth referrals and social media and the other 20% comes from online or him going to a random events, meeting people and picking up clients randomly.

    Personally, I am building a business around sharing and teaching yoga.

    Of course networking varies depending on the nature of the business.

    Any discussion, insights and tips on networking and building  a client base is welcome.