I have done this a few times now. Usually after an hour of two of Qigong practice. It definitely feels psychedelic, tribal almost, there is a very powerful shift in consciousness. It's actually frightening at first when your energy shifts, but it feels sort of warm, and magical. 
This breath-work session for me generated a lot of energy, and created some profounds shifts in my consciousness. 
Needless to say I will be studying breath-work and becoming a certified teacher. 
I hope you enjoy this breath-work sessions and let us know what your experience is.
 
 
 

Hi Ayham, I remember that very well. Facing everything the separate-self can throw at you head on.... And it can throw a lot... Maya is not letting one off the hook easily...
The Game-Changer for me was the book "Pointing Out the Great Way, Daniel Brown". At least for me personally, 95% of the meditation system out there would have never worked for me.
They would have been too unpleasant, or needing more much willpower. Or I would have get stuck in the several traps there are, where ones practice can "bottom out", and lead nowhere.... So I can not highly enough express my gratitude for the heroic pioneering effort of Daniel Brown translating all these books, and getting the (in my opinion) most sophisticated meditation system of the planet to the West. It has been practiced and refined for hundreds of years, developed further, elaborated in hundreds of Tibetan Books, producing a steady stream if deeply enlightened beings. 
It achieves a precision of technical vocabulary in the stage decriptions of evolving meditation, meditation experiences, resulting understandings and insights about ones mindstream and Reality emerging at different stages like nothing I have ever seen, and I studied more or less all major meditation systems, reading a few hundreds of books.
The book is several hundreds of pages. It lead to me awe and deep respect of the Mahamudra-System when realizing at certain stages that I just had experienced the exact same flow of meditation experiences and understandings/insights than Tibetan meditators hundreds of years ago.
Of course I can't summarize a few hundred pages of the book with the musings below. But I try to give a first taste of the system, with some personal experiences with it, and how it all developed for me, just to show off how great and oh so wonderful I am     . No, just kidding... Because I would have loved to have had something like a"user experience" with certain meditation systems like that 15 years ago, to get a feeling for a certain path, and the experiences others are having with it.
Concentrative Meditation:
I would recommend starting with concentrative meditation, the Elephant Path (all Tibetan schools use it). There are several stages of concentrative meditation that must be mastered, and tools learned doing it. They are very well described in Pointing out the Great Way, and "The Elephant Path: Attention Development and Training in Children and Adolescents", in the chapter of Daniel Brown. Here is explicitely stated what one learnes while learning concentrative meditation. By the way, that system is in my humble oinion more sophisticated than Zen or Vipassana, because it includes techniques like easing up and intensifying. That is essential for making it efficient, and these techniques are just not there in Vipassana and Zen. These aspects (easing up and intensifying) one learns there by conincidence, or not at all.  In the beginning, you don't stay long on the meditation object (breath, stone, candle, not so important), but just catch yourself when you have wandered off, your monkey mind taking you on a ride and elaborating something else. Now: Don't put negative reaction/feedback on that, but move attention/focus back. You can only control focus/attention, you can't force what thoughts emerge. So meditation is always moving attention back from wandering off, and the more you do that, the more pliant the mind becomes: Less wandering off, and if wandered off much faster to move it back. And when that goes quite well with a little bit less wandering off or loosing attention. Then, when its more automatic, you "ease up", which means you use less energy and focus, and see if you can stay on the object. If yes, good: Ease Up. Easing Up brings more clarity to what else goes on in the mindstream. Which lets you notice more of the subtler arisings of the mindstream emerging. When you drift off more than, then intensify: Inhale strongly, increase focus, energize. And see then if you stay more on the object. If you do, ease up. Find the optimum energy balance you need to stay on the object. One balances easing up and intensifying then.... Then your clarity will increase, your energy will become nice, joy can start to arise.  And then you do that for a few months, a year.... Meditation Experiences of Clarity, Lucidity, Bliss and Non-conceptuality (silent mind) can occur, but also go again. They are just experiences passing in you. This way, you train your focus and make your mind pliant. When you can stay on the objects for a few minutes without totally getting lost in elaborated thoughts, and keep some focus on the object while wandering off in thought a bit, you have partial staying.... at some point you have pretty good staying on the object for a few minutes. Meditation without an object:
Then comes a big change, that you can start doing then: Change to the Mindstream of thoughts itself as meditation object. And try to stay mindful of the mind watching that mindstream.  If you can keep doing that (which takes a long time), you can start taking the meditation into daily life. Investigating the Nature of thoughts:
See Pointing Out the Great Way for that. Thoughts are no different than consciousness, which is empty/nothing, yet has clarity/awareness, so its not a nothing at all. If you look into a thought, you don't find it, it disappears. Is cut off. One can never see or find a thought. Looking into a thought, an experience of un-findability arises. Empty, nothing specific. But with clear alert awareness of consciousness. Empty and aware. Nothingness, yet something that is not nothing. Nothingness. Emptiness. Consciousness. And more important: When really looking into the nature of a thought, it evaporates. Is cut off. Disappears. Reveals its nature of emptiness. With exactly that phenomenon is worked in the "Skill of Recognition", see below. Doesn't that effect appear as very useful to get thoughts and the mindstream under control? Of course! That effect of the thought evaporating, revealing its nature as Nothingness/Consciousness when looking into it, and generalizing that oberservation and understanding on the whole mindstream and all events it contains and can contain. That is understanding the continuum of the mindstream. The nature of thoughts. You don't control the thoughts which arise, that is why you/the person is also empty, a concept. Because what are you, if you don't even control your thoughts, and what thoughts arise? After having mastered Concentrative meditation, and having understood (contemplation) the nature of thoughts as consciousness/awareness/emptiness/suchness/Nothingness, you can put that into practice:
Skill of Recognition: (1. Yoga of Mahamudra system)
Now it gets interesting. That was the decisivepoint for me once I understood that, and implemented it. Afterwards, it started to get nondual pretty soon... If you look HOW the thoughts emerge, (1) out of what they emerge, (2) what they are, (3) in what they move (4) into what they disappear ALL of that (1)(2)(3)(4) must be present. Thoughts DO appear. From "something". Stay in "something". Consisting of "something" All of that is Emptiness, or Consciousness, or Nothingness. Thoughts are made of "that","move in that", "dissolve into that". and you will never SEE that, or can say what it is. Nothing. But not a blank nothing. An aware Nothing. Actually the essence of all world-appearances, but that comes later, when it gets nondual, at the Yoga of One Taste. What happens if you investigate into emerging thoughts this way, is that they get FASTER. VERY FAST. Like 20-30 emergent thoughts/feeling arisings per second, most of them rudimentary. The mind does this to keep the illusion going. To make it too fast for you. But at some point, you learned to get that fast also... Basically, looking into a thought, one sees its Emptiness/Nothingness (one doesn't find the thought, it evaporates). It is cut off. Dzogchen calls this cutting off "Trekchö". Daniel Brown called this stage a "High Speed Search Task into the unfindability of the nature of thoughts". A High Speed Search task into their emptiness, into their nature as consciousness, as Nothingness. So the emerging gets fast, very fast. Daniel Ingram also mentions that. But at some point, with enough practice and familiarity, YOU get faster. You spot and cut off every very fast, subtle, fragmentary thought arising. None of them "grips" you anymore, since you have seen them all, and their structure. Just thoughts arising very fast. You don't control which thoughts arise. Depended origination, they are just emerging by themselves. You can focus on just their arising (of thoughts), just their staying, just their going away. At some point, they just emerge, looking into their nature is automatic, and they immediately dissolve. No duration. Just emergence, and poof gone. And when you are fast enough, you get a continuance of staying mindful. When that happens its pretty clear what happened. Your attention got so fast that you can stay mindful even through the high-speed thought emergence. At the end, they come very fast, they don't get "elaborated out". Thinking, or elaborating the thoughts out, is slower than their emergence. They emerge already fully complete with their content, and then slowly get "talked/elaborated" in your mind.  Natural reaction: So WHO the f*** am I (pardon my french) when I don't control what thoughts emerge and if they appear fully with their content in a fraction of a second, and get elaborated later in a hypnotic show over several second? good question... to be answered later. Outcome is:  You know the nature of every possible thought (Consciousness-Emptiness-Nothingness), of the whole mental-continuum of thoughts, all that there can be. Their nature. you can cut off or transcend/just watch your normal mindstream in most daily situations without getting caught up/hypnotized by it, which already here leads to a lot of bliss. Not sufficient bliss to get ones separate self completely handled, but already quite wonderful. That is the start of real freedom. You know how your mindstream hypnotizes you, and gets faster when you actually look into each thought arising and its nature. At some point you get fast enough to cut off every arising, or let it elaborate in a controlled aka mindful way. Yoga of Unelaboration (2. Yoga of Mahamudra-System)
Here, you finish off with time. You open up the eternal always here mind. Past and future become deeply understood as imagined/manifested right here and now, not really existing. Only the eternal now exists. Not as idea, as concept, as understanding, but as felt and lived reality. Deeply realized. Always Here. Eternal. How ones True Being can be immortal/eternal/always here becomes a very real possibility here. Later on, the emerging possibility "of how that could work" become validated beyond any possible doubt. Pointing Out the Great Way: "From where does the first mind-moment [the thought-arising] arise? Then, where does it stay? Finally, where does it go when it stops? The "mind" in which all this is happening is Always Here. Always Here Mind. Time is not "out there", self-existing. You only notice time because of change, of emerging thoughts and appearances. time is a mere construct/concept. No change of appearances/thoughts, no time. "One" doesn't control the content of the emergent thoughts "Through dependent origination certain propensities [thought capsules with their full content already "inside" emerge] at the very subtle level ripen into subtle movements within the temporal mental continuum, which in turn become constructed into and elaborated as coarse-level thoughts [get elaborated into long thoughts that get told in awareness over several seconds] and appearances" dependend origination: "one" doesn't control which thoughts emerge. "The skilled meditator can view events transforming from very subtle propensities to specific subtle mind-moments and constructed coarse thoughts and appearances seeming to arise and pass in the temporal mental continuum through a process of dependent origination" Seeing and understanding the emergence of the thoughts (fully formed out with all their content, but not yet elaborated in the mindstream, emerging in the Always Here Mind), and seeing this in real-time because ones attention got fast enough, is a game-changer. That stage is very hard to fully understand in Pointing Out the Great Way. At least for me, it took me a long time. . I would have been faster with coaching.... Yoga of One Taste (3. Yoga of Mahamudra System)
So here it gets nondual and mere appearance, floating in Nothingness. No more a solid and external/duality reality "out there" anymore. But an infinite limitless field of Infinite Consciousness, manifesting an appearing world of mere appearances arising in it. A loving blissful boundless timeless field of  bright lucid Awakened Awareness. This is where probably (my pet-theory) the Endohuasca-System starts working. https://dmtquest.org/endohuasca-magic/ The practice is basically taking the insights of stage 2 and putting them into practice, specifically also in daily everyday life. With that, one gets enough time and momentum in meditation to really make the difference, to get it nondual. To make all that with sitting meditation on the pillow, at least for me it would have been a full-time job. And I did a demanding career and some other stuff in the meantime also... The view taken all thoughts/mental events emerge in the Always Here Mind, or Simultaneous Mind (which means nondual).  same with all world appearances. The essence of all thoughts is emptiness/consciousness, and the essence of all visual field appearances is also emptiness/appearance/consciousness. That is called the "One Taste" of every arising (thought or world-appearance). Nondual in other words. and being aware of the emerging high-speed stream of thoughts emerging already with full content, but getting elaborated in the seconds following, and cutting off most of the emergent thoughts by looking into their nature, which has been automized by this point enough clarity and mindfulness is generated that at some point The Visual Field/"world": Becomes mere appearance and infinite/limitless becomes mere appearance appearances 1) the world no longer feels "out-there". Everything arising just arises in oneself. 2) appearances loose their solidity. One can not tell if they are solid "objects" out there, or just appearances happening in the timeless Always-Here-Mind 3) At some point later, with a lot of meditation-mindfulness-momentum, the "inside" feeling as pure empty awareness, a very transparent witness, but not even that because the awareness is no longer separate: the visual field becomes really mere appearance. One looks at something, and its just appearance hovering in Nothingness. You feel into it, and its essence is the same as the indescripbable Nothingness behind ones head. luminous mere appearances, very similiar to trip-descriptions. the limit of the visual field, and the wondering of "what is behind it", become limitless or infinite there is "nothing" behind it. One just imagines a border/boundary of the visual field one imagines that something must be behind it (like 3D-Space continues". No, 3D-space is imagined in dimensionless Nothingness/Infinite Consciousness. 3D-Space is not self-existing, dangling out there. That was a biggie for me, took a long time to get, and could have been much faster with coaching. Guess I am quite a visual person  Time is gone. Timeless Everything can only happen here, and now Past is imagined here and now , future also here and now  the "subject"/"me", the separate self Gestalt/arisings, feeling and being separate from the whole Reality, slowly gets transcended and dissolves, more and more aspects of the person/separate self are seen as arisings moving within oneself. finally, after a long path of transcending every identity/I-thought/I-feeling of the Ego/Body-Mind/character, it becomes a transparent witness, nothing but still something witnessing the visual field. At some point, One can't tell AT ALL what one is, nothing positive is left. I am not the body/person, anything. Only aware Emptiness. But somehow some murky Witness or something like that still there. One literally doesn't know what one is, besides the nondual field... One becomes the visual field of mere appearance, one is that in a nondual way. any sense of location or center slowly dissolves. One becomes the whole boundless timeless field of mere empty, groundless appearance. Sometimes lucid and shimmering, like mere appearance. Some traditions call that already Enlightenment, or Kensho/Satori/Awakening. And it is in some way. But Nonduality is not already Full or Great Enlightenment, where there is absolutely no doubt about ones nature, and the nature of reality. That can become clear like ice-cold water thrown in ones face.  Nonduality can be very well experienced by a separate self, just try some psychedelics.... To reach Nonduality sobre without psychdelics, one already has to be quite empty or transcended the separate self, but not necessarily (and normally) fully. With psychedelics, you don't need to empty (or have transcended the separate self) at all. 5 MeO will do that for, even if you don't want. Not fully empty, not the last step (no traces of  Individuality/transparent witness left, see above), but very very much. that brings us to the last stage, Stage 4 of the Mahamudra System, the Yoga of Nonmeditation. And here is where meditation, and the long time it enables in these very empty states of dissolving every last speck of individuality/last very subtle separate self arisings/last very subtle illusions, becomes paramount.  Only this 4. stage enables the final crossing over to fully, without a doubt, knowing what Ones True Self, and Reality, really is. Without that, suffering, grasping for ever more Awakenings, and still being a bit "gaslighting-ability" of the finality of ones realization/awakening, continues. Yoga of Nonmeditation (4. Yoga of Mahamudra System)
What is already the case, from stage 3 Yoga of One Taste: The visual field/world already arises in the Always Here Mind as mere groundless luminous appearance, with Nothingness as its essence in an infinite limitless field of Awareness Space in the timeless Always Here Mind so many ingredients of the True State of Things, ones True Identity as Boundless Changeless Timeless Reality are already in place. That is already very lovely, filled mostly with bliss. Like really really nice. But not fully the Unshakeable Unchanging Reality that one intuits to really be, with its Infinite Love, Peace and Bliss. Only one thing is still missing for conforming fully to the enlightened mindstream, and fully crossing over to it with the sudden recognition of ones True Identity, Reality itself, Absolute Impersonal Infinite Consciousness, Nothingness. and that is the last remants of the Empty/Transparent Witness, or what Brown calls artifical activity. The last remnants of individuality, of I-feeling, I-thoughts arising in oneself. The last aspects of being a bit separate from Reality itself, from being not fully empty/transcended. A very subtle transparent witness, already being nondual, identifying with an infinite nondual field. Bassui (Zen, in Three Pillars of Zen) calls this Awareness of Emptiness, or Awareness of Beingness. A very subtle feeling of still  being aware of SOMETHING, even if that is infinite Nonduality. Not full and complete nonduality and oneness. Still a subtle (very subtle) separate self aware of the Totality. Not the Totality being fully aware of itself, like in perceptions perceiving themselves. One can do NOTHING here to cross over to Full Enlightenment/Basis Enlightenment. Because that would be an act of a separate self. An effort. A movement of a separate self WANTING something, manipulating the mindstream, grasping for the understanding, doing something.... One can only automize the meditation/mindfullness, staying fully present, letting the Awakened Impersonal Awareness flow by itself, let IT do the meditation itself, get out of the way... Bringing out the full force of this Utterly Impersonal Awakened Awareness. Ones True Identity. And that is the last contra-intuitive trap: ONE CAN'T FORCE IT ("artifical activity"). Because forcing it would be a separate self arising doing it. One can try to force it (for example Koan-style), but then the Crossing Over normally happens in a moment of grace, of relaxation, when artificial activity is not present. And once the last very subtle remnants of the separate self are seen as moving within oneself, just changing and temporary arisings/movements consisting of I-thoughts and I-feelings, the last subtle lenses ("Individuality,separateness") are recognized and dropped/transcended/no longer believed and just cut off/let go/Trekchö-style. All and any center gone, no separate anything remaining anywhere, forcing its claws of suffering into the natural bliss of Enlightened Infinite Nondual Empty Reality itself, perceptions perceiving themselves, shimmering in Infinite Always here Nothingness, in Infinite Nondual Consciousness. The Universal Mind, Nothingness. Realizing that nothing is lost if the separate self illusion is realized and seen as that what it really is, and always was: Just appearances happening and moving within the Always Here True Self/Reality. All that is lost is an illusion, what is gained is Reality itself and its inherent bliss.  And indeed welcome home, to a home you never left, on a journey that never really happened....
Bon Voyage! 
Selling Water by the River
PS: By the way, that is not a nice theory and beautiful claims, but a path actually walked over many years (although because of lacking coaching and not being too smart sometimes from my side making it take longer than actually needed).
But I am still very very thankful that I picked that path, and not 10-15 years face against the wall Zen-monastery Koan-style. That would have also maybe worked (but I don't know, that system has many pitfalls the Tibetans have identified and made maps for to avoid these), but would have been much less pleasant, at least for me. Would have felt like digging a hole with a shovel instead with a climatized excavator, doing most of the meditation in daily life instead of some hardcore-monastery-fulltime-environment.
So I can understand all those that don't like meditation, because it is maybe the hardest thing one can actually do, depending on the system. Give this system a try!
PSPS: Before one maybe starts thinking that nothing matters, and Karma is just an Illusion, since Individuality and everything else is an illusion anyways, and nothing matters, like ethics, common sense, Karma, compassion and so on:
Be sure that reality will give you a crosscheck if that is really the case, or just a funny idea/concept. And then let's see if suffering hurts and grips, or is still just considered an Illusion. Compassion and Boddhichitta for all beings (which are nothing but the same One Reality without a second) actually is a pretty hard entrance criteria to any of these states decribed above. With honest and practiced compassion/ethics/Boddhichitta, one has the support from all of Infinite Reality on ones path. And how much intuition and intelligence emerges in ones mindstream is guided only by this One Infinitely Intelligent Reality without a second.  

During the months leading up to my very recent spiritual awakening, I experienced a pretty weird incident of clairvoyance.
As you can read in my report, I've went through a phase of existential depression (for lack of a better word... I've had experienced depressive phases before in my life, but this felt more "soft" and emotionally charged than the grim and dull numbness that I've had to struggle with in the past). During that phase, I sometimes walked the streets of the city that I am living in, silently stewing in my inner turmoil and mulling over my life situation. And during these walks I often had these visions of one of my flatmates (whom I know as a very tranquil and peaceful person, even though he seems to have unresolved issues) having a physical fight with someone in the living room of our flat. At this point, I had never seen him having any kind of quarrel with anybody, let alone hitting someone, so I really didn't understand where these images came from.
And what do you know... when I celebrated my birthday in December at home with my flatmates, that vision actually became reality. (I had bought a bottle of Scotch for the occasion and offered some to my friend, who is a light weight when it comes to alcohol... not the smartest move, lol.)
I sat there and could not believe my eyes. In that moment, I really wondered if I am starting to loose my mind.
That was the strangest thing that has happened to me so far (apart from me realizing the eternal timelessness of the present moment and my own immortality, of course... heh). I had never really believed in psychic powers until that moment, but now... let's just say that I don't believe anything to be impossible any more!

I stumbled upon the classical "box breathing" technique that is used by NAVY seals that is supposed to stimulate the vagus nerve. What I noticed was that when I was breathing out and holding my breath, I got the most relaxation while using this technique. This spiraled me into experimenting with breath work.
What I figured out was that when I sat on a chair bending my chest towards my feet while I emptied my lungs of air, before I sat up and held my breath, I could feel the anxiety in my solar plexus chakra expanding down to my root chakra to the point where it felt like I was going to pee my pants. I did this 10 times every day. For each time I held my breath, I sat with this uncomfortable feeling (like I was going to drown) for longer periods of time. 20 secs, 25 secs, 30x2 secs, 35x2secs etc (these time limits are for me personally and should be adapted to every individual person - the point is that the feeling should become so uncomfortable that it is really hard to stay with the anxiety). You can feel the heartbeat pace dropping down while doing so. What happens is that the threshold limit for activation in the autonomous nervous system starts becomes higher. Its kind of a exposure therapy.
This has helped me a lot. Its like a staircase, where you sleep better at night, do the exercise the next day, and sleep even better the day after. In daily life, anxiety just disappears in all kinds of situations. I used to be a nerve wreck sometimes doing while psychedelics, but since I have implemented this I haven't had any bad trips ever since. It's like being totally zen in a war zone. The exercise could be analogous to the free divers that dosen´t feel the drowning sensation when they are pushing themselves while diving and just passing out in an blink of an eye.
A friend of mine have had really hard struggle with crippling social anxiety, and this exercise has transformed his life.
Has anybody tried this?

Neccesary:
1. Learn siddhasana pose. 
2. Learn anus lock (bandha), practice it in meditation until 'automatically' you can hold this lock withouth effort. 
3. Do some form or yoga or stretching that enables you to have your back straight with no pain or discomfort.
Once you have this three mastered, go sit in the floor and do the following:
1. Sit in siddhasana pose (eyes closed)
2. Rest your hands on your knees, facing upwards (Relieve all tension onto the arms, and hands. They should be totally relaxed and let go.)
3. Make sure your back is totally straight and you are comfortable at the same time.
4. Now, Produce a very very light and subtle tension from the lower back so you execute anus lock (the bandha), and while you are doing this focus on the awareness of the tension or 'channel of awareness' that goes from the lower back up to the spine.
5. Once you are perceiving this energetic channel going upwards, focus your attention on the third eye/the space between the eyebrows, and bring it up even higher, your eyes are closed, but it should feel like your eyes are trying to go 'upwards' or trying to look into the sky. 
6. Completely die-make maximum intensity of awareness on to the eyes and upwards. Make that all the awareness-energy channel goes through it, make it end there. Stay there, totally intense and devoted, meanwhile body should be at ease (you should not be tense physically).
 
Stay in this state and totally let go, but no hunky dory let go, intensely focus on the asana/pose completely and devotionally, if you do this right, it should come to a point where there is no more individual experience. Stay there and enjoy the fireworks, watching Reality doing 'its thing' while you are gone, is definetely something else. 
 

Some of the highest realizations you can possibly have can do more harm than good to you and others, if you're not cautious. You must integrate the realization, let it sink in, and then eventually let it go. If you cling to it, it will become nasty. 
Most of you are lost in beliefs and ideas, thinking that you have figured it all out. You are trapped and don't even know it. I can tell because I freed myself from these traps numerous times. I still have to do it, from time to time. If you are on this path, you are going to fall into these traps, sooner or later. It's inevitable.
You are all so busy defending your ideas, that you fail to see that they are just that. Ideas. Or, thoughts - if you will. No matter how 'high' they might seem. Because guess what..?
I am God - is a thought
I am not God - is also a thought
You are everything - is a thought 
You are all alone - is a thought 
All is one - is a thought 
And so on...
Whatever you say here or elsewhere, is a thought. An idea. It's not actuality. Actuality is unspeakable. Not doable. It cannot be felt or seen. That would imply duality, which is not Truth. Truth only is. It is being. It is breathing. It is pure presence. Not the idea of all those, but actuality.
All of those fancy realizations can ruin your life very fast if you're not mature enough to handle them. You could easily end up in a mental institution, hurt someone, or try to jump of a balcony to prove to everyone that you are God and you cannot die - like I tried to do once while high on psychedelics, in the early stages of my awakening lol. But even if you don't go that far, you might end up just becoming a shit person. Acting all enlightened and whatnot and then turning into a six year old and throwing a tantrum when someone triggers you a little bit. All because you believe you are God, or a hyper conscious alien squirrel, a wizard, a unicorn, or whatever else that's stuck in your head.
Let all that go. Be what you claim you've realized yourself to be and stop screaming about it in everyone's face. 
 
 
What if I told you that you can just simply be, without having to think about or believe in who or what you are?
(don't) think about it... You might just awaken.

Oh, there are things to do.
There are things to do such as Blissing myself out in the pool listening to Wizkid all day... watching the sky, the birds doing 'their thing', and maybe we can some Fine First grade Kombucha from that Flax & Kale you recommended me (which I´m becoming addicted to), and when dawn comes let's throw a good cigar.
Let me tell you, you can not become tired of the good life. No one having the time of their life started praying to God to say 'please god! Let me have some suffering at last!! A bit of anxiety! A bit of boredom at least! Please!!"
That has never happened in existence to this day 
Although...if that is what you like, I won't be there to stop you from dancing that "eternal dance of duality" of course ?‍? 

@Water by the River You are a fucking idiot.
You have no fucking idea what AWAKE is.
NONE.
SHUT UP!
YOU'RE FUCKING STUPID.
STOP CORRUPTING MY FORUM WITH YOUR HORSESHIT.

Really? It's the legal in almost all countries and even in countries where it's illegal they don't care. You won't get addicted.
Last tips, better use a bong than a pipe because of the jet flame. (I do it with pipe but I have burned myself couple times which you can avoid)
Sagewisdombotanicals is probably the most legit source. As it's legal you can search it yourself, they are the only ones who offer it in liquid form, to have a more classic trip.

Try Transmissions. They can ramp things up.
Sat Shree has free group transmissions on zoom every morning. If you live in America then the time might fit your schedule.
With transmissions it is not very important to be focused and present, but to be sensitive and open. Once you made the connection with the transmission energy and it starts really working for you, then you could be in complete monkey mind and the transmission would still work, it would put you into deeper meditation and cause bliss, nondualness and peace and maybe also a peaceful mind.
 
If you want to bruteforce strengthen your focus abilities, you could try mentally chanting something like "aware" constantly during meditation. It still requires focus, but it becomes much easier to stay focused, because it kind of prevents other thoughts and constantly reminds you of the task.
The faster you repeat "aware" the easier it becomes to remain aware.
You could start the session with 30 times per 10 seconds to exhaust the mind. Then 20 times for a fast pace and then 10 times for a slow pace. 
Once your concentration becomes better, after weeks or months, you can then lower it to 5 times per 10 seconds. And then to normal breath focus. And then to observing your thoughts.

I am very experienced on this, i've reach a level where i am able to have a lucid dream almost every time i propose to myself and i used to do shadow work every time i got there.
 
First of all, you will need to learn how to induce and stabilize lucid dreams with ease, there are a lots of techniques, the most useful for me was the Go back to bed Technique where you set an alarm in the middle of the night then go back to sleep.
Then, for stabilization you will need to create your own technique, in my case i just spawn a sort of a dial in my wrist and adjusted to get "more conscious"  inside the dream.
 
The next step is to be able to get Total control over your Dream scenery and objects, for spawning People you can turn your back and clap your hands while imagining the person you want to spawn, or spawn them behind a close door.
The same is for spawning objects, you need to find a drawer or a storage of some form and snap your fingers imagining the objects is already there.
 
 
So after you learned the basics, Shadow Work can be done with ease, the work is very simple, every time you communicate with someone or something inside your dream you are talking with your subconscious, so you will need to just ask the correct answers like:
"What am i most fearful of?"
"What i need to learn about myself?"
"Is there something very important that i forget?" (The response of this one is very astonishing)
"How can i raise my self steem?"
"How can i get rid of my depression?"
"Show me my traumas", etc.
 
There are many ways to ask this questions, you can simply talk with the characters on the dreams surroundings or also you can just spawn a telephone and there will be always someone to talk to you on the other side.
The funny thing is that there is some point when you will be receiving stupid answers or no-logic statements, is like the subconscious characters got pissed of by you and start no giving a fuck, but majority of times the answers will be very very useful.
 

After going back and forth, I always come back to do nothing. I just described my self inquiry process in the other thread, and that's basically my meditation. The only difference I would make is that in self inquiry, there is still an element of curiosity and penetration of whatever arises (even though it's passive and non-manipulative), and in meditation I even drop that. Not doing anything. Simply listening and watching whatever is. Listening and watching not being an activity, but the natural awareness of simply letting yourself be. Not trying ANYTHING. Interestingly, by doing that, concentration builds up effortlessly. Concentration through focusing on something can help, but for me personally defies the purpose of surrender. True concentration is completely effortless. I have to come back to clarity and non-manipulation through noticing and effort, but that effort is thinned out the longer I practice and what remains is existence itself.
Right now, I love "A Course of Love". It's incredibly deep. But there's so much good stuff. All you guys fired me up to read Ingram's book at some point. I'm also reading Almaas' "The Unfolding Now", which is the guide to the meditation technique I just described to you. It's by far the best meditation book I know, I would highly recommend it. 

scopolamine is an anticholinergic substance that is well known in medical circles but with very limited use, mostly used as patches for motion sickness. I was searching about this material after realizing that it has psychoactive properties. Scopolamine is the main psychoactive material in nightshades like datura. At high doses, it can cause hallucinations and amnesia. Anyways, many scientific studies have found that this substance has immediate antidepressant and anxiolytic action. So it can be used by mentally ill people to have an instant effect which is something rather rare among antidepressants, most of them require weeks before noticeable effect. Also, some studies have found another amazing effect of this substance. IT has been found that helps massively with nicotine withdrawal and craving after smoking cessation. No withdrawal symptoms and fewer cravings were the effects among users who get treated in special clinics for smoking cessation. 
Do you know buscopan tablets? yes, those use for abdominal crampings. you can crush them and then smoke the powder. The active substance in these tablets is converted to scopolamine when smoking them and it was documented in many prisons that inmates used this method to get high. 
I crushed some tablets, subjected them to heat, and inhaled the smoke. Within 30 seconds I felt much much calmer, less anxious, and more lucid ( I have multiple mental illnesses) So yeah it works! I would not call it a high, It feels more meditation-like. I noticed also it is very good at eliminating OCD thoughts which huant me 24/7. Also, I am feeling a warm beautiful body fuzz. I felt no side effects. But I still don't know how much scopolamine I inhaled But  I think it is a very minimal dose. Does it have a psychedelic effect? I don't know,  maybe at higher doses but from reading datura trips they are quite mentally and physically taxing trips so don't recommend doing it for sure. 
Anyways, I  am wondering if I can use the active material in those scopolamine patches safely. Each one contains about 1 mg of scopolamine, but I am worried about any other substances within the patch if say I put it in my mouth to access the substance via the buccal route. Accessing IV socopolamine is not possible so   I am looking for ways to get the substance to experiment with.
WARNING: scopolamine can cause extreme physical and mental symptoms and even death if used in high doses and inappropriately.
 
This is  my new account, my old old one is @Eren Eeager

Transmissions are the most powerful tool to increase your baseline Consciousness. I can't believe they are so little known.
I think one reason is that oftentimes when people try transmissions, they feel nothing at first. For Transmissions to work best, you need to be sensitive. Many are not sensitive enough, but by repeatedly receiving transmissions you increase your sensitivity and the transmissions become more and more powerful.
Another reason is that many transmissions have been around only for a very short time. I believe the popularity of transmissions will explode within the next years. 
The main aim of transmissions is to slowly increase you baseline consciousness, but many transmissions also have an immediate short term effect and can get you into Samadhi, like for example pure Divinity and SAT and to a lesser extend Shaktipat and KAP. 
(this Post about dimensions of Consciousness is foundational to some things I will mention here)
 
There are two different kinds of Transmissions
1. Aura Transmission
That's the classical transmission. You sit beside an enlightened guru and by his presence your consciousness alters. 
This works because everyone has an energy field, an aura, and whenever you are around someone (to a small extend even when you merely think about someone) your auras overlap and affect each other. That's how you sometimes pick up emotions of other people (though you usually don't recognize this and believe they are your own emotions). 
For example Ramana Maharshi gave these kinds of Transmissions. I believe sitting with Sadhguru, Mooji or Eckart Tolle would also give you this kind of transmission (varying strength of course).
And I believe every Shaktipat Transmission also works like that. 
 
 
2. Channeled Transmission
Here the person channels an external energy. For example: RASA, SAT and Light transmission. With pure Divinity and KAP I'm not entirely sure whether they are channeled.
 
Here are the most powerful transmissions I know of:
 
- Pure Divinity 
The only person I know of who can give this transmission is Gareth Duignam. In this video he talks about pure Divinity and how he became able to give it (happened just a few weeks ago). As far as I know, you need to be in ParaBrahman to be able to give it.
For me the state of consciousness the transmission puts me in just feels like pure Divinity lol. I believe this is the most powerful transmission for enlightenment. And Gareth and many people who have been receiving pure Divinity also say that it is the most powerful transmission. 
You can receive pure Divinity in a one on one session with Gareth, or during his Zoom Meditations (Tuesdays and Fridays) (the zoom meditations are currently either a combination of pure Divinity and SAT or pure Divinity and Shaktipat), or in his live YouTube  transmissions (every Monday) (currently pure Divinity + SAT), or in a normal youtube transmission video like this:
Gareth also holds weekend online intensives once or twice each month.
 
- SAT Transmission
Also called Supramental Force. Explained in this video. Gareth can give SAT, as well as Sat Shree. 
SAT is said to come from Brahman. I guess you could consider Brahman as the formless Godhead. And the purpose of this transmission is to get to Brahman. SAT is by far the most powerful transmission for Brahman Consciousness and therfore is my favourite transmission.
Brahman Consciousness is similar to what is experienced during conscious sleep, therefore SAT is also helpful for sleep yoga.
After having been receiving SAT for some time, my baseline is a bit closer to that formless Brahman Consciousness. But the most significant impact of SAT has been on my meditations which are also closer to Brahman Consciousness now. Peak states feel very close to Brahman Consciousness. During these, my recognition dimension is in Brahman Consciousness and the depth/immersion dimension seems close (recognition and depth dimension explained here). That means it's a very altered state of consciousness. But this is not solely because of SAT, it obviously also has to do with my high baseline consciousness, high sensitivity and brainwave skills from sleep yoga. But I am very sure that SAT has its good share. There has undoubtedly been a deepening of the depth dimension due to SAT. So I think this is the main thing you can expect from SAT, an impact on your depth dimension, mainly during meditation but also a bit on your baseline. This is also what most people report, very deep meditation. Some experience dropping in and out of consciousness (including me sometimes) which might maybe be Nirvikalpa Samadhi.
A very nice thing about SAT (and pure Divinity maybe too) is that once you are strongly connected to the force, it will start to automatically come down randomly during the day but mainly during meditation. And you begin to be able to channel it yourself.
Also if you often join the zoom group transmissions, you will naturally get connected to the group. Many people have been reporting to get transmissions during times when Gareth gives a transmission to someone else of the group, because of the conection to the group. This also happens if you meditate at the same time as the zoom transmissions, though it is more powerful to actually join. (this also applies to pure Divinity and I think for his Shaktipat also)
 
The aim of SAT is Brahman Consciousness but that doesn't mean you will get there. Brahman Consciousness is an extremely advanced state. I assume the vast majority of spiritual teachers aren't able to enter that state, probably never been there. Even with psychedelics it is rare to reach it (Brahman Consciousness means completely dissolving the dream, your room is gone, as well as body sensations).
 
 
- RASA
RASA is very effective to increase your recognition dimension (up until a certain point). Once at LOC 1000 you are probably subtly conscious of God, Love, Nothingness and Oneness.
How strongly you will be conscious depends on factors like your genetics, brain chemistry before RASA,  how much spiritual progress you have made apart from RASA,...
RASA is what got me from normal human consciousness into woke consciousness (around 2 years ago). Though it was subtle (because it only addresses the recognition dimension). 
I started from the LOC 570s and I think it took me around 13  1on1 sessions or so until LOC 1000.
You can receive 1on1 RASA sessions from Ramaji or Ananda, or any other RASA giver (I think they have half the price). Ramaji and Ananda also hold monthly zoom meetings with RASA at the end. They also uploaded some of them (including the RASA) to YouTube .
To learn more about the LOC 1000 model, read Ramaji's book "1000".
 
- Shaktipat
The purpose of Shaktipat is to awaken your kundalini. Once fully awake (which is very rare) you are automatically in a higher baseline consciousness. But the most significant effect of kundalini is Bliss. The more awake your kundalini, the higher your Bliss (baseline but mainly meditations).
For me Shaktipat puts me in a deep and blissful meditation. It has also resulted in much progress in kundalini awakening. After a few weeks of receiving Shaktipat several times a week + watching Shaktipat youtube videos during meditation + some kriya supreme fire I experienced vibrations in my spine (during meditation, when focusing on the spine) (I had done around 500 hours of kundalini yoga up until this point, and my meditations were already energetic from invoking spirits). The vibrations were pulsating up and down. First they went till the 3rd chakra, then the 4th, then 5th, and eventually into the brain (maybe 1-2 weeks later). Upon that, I experienced strong literal bliss going up my spine, putting me into deep bliss, sometimes ecstasy. This lasted for a few weeks, and was strongest during meditation. Then it subsided. But during meditation around 20-80% of the bliss is still there, depending on the quality of the meditation. I believe my kundalini is partially awake, but not fully.
People I know of who can give strong Shaktipat:
Jan Esmann He probably gives the strongest Shaktipat, particularly if you get to sit around him. He does intensives in Europe, if you can join one, that would probably be quite an experience. Gareth's kundalini fully woke up during an intensive with Jan. Jan also woke up Diana's kundalini. He also gives shaktipat in absentia. He charges a mala necklace and mails it to you. I got one, and can recommend it. He also holds Zoom Transmissions every Tuesday. And has YouTube transmissions .
 
Kai Shanti I think her transmissions are a combination of shaktipat and God's Grace. They are quite strong for me. The state of consciousness it puts me in is a bit similar to the one from pure Divinity. So it is divine, blissful and energetic. Very recommended. 
She speaks an intuitive light language during the transmissions, and is also very psychic, so she can for example see blockages you have.
She gives 1 on 1 transmissions  as well as weekly live group transmissions on learnitlive.com . You can get a learnitlive membership for around $8 a month and then can join these sessions for free. She also has transmissions on  YouTube . 
 
Gareth Gareth gives Shaktipat in 1 on 1 sessions, as well as in zoom group sessions (currently in combination with pure Divinity) and he also has some Shaktipat transmissions on Youtube. 
 
Advaitashram They have several Shaktipat givers. They offer 1 on 1 sessions as well as weekly zoom sessions on Tuesday and Wednesday. Website
 
Kip He sells audios charged with Shaktipat.  Try the free samples on his website, I immediately felt an effect from the Kali one. I bought all of them and, using Audacity, layered them into one audio. I currently listen to it during meditation (+plus video transmissions from Gareth). You could even get the audio of all kundalini transmissions on youtube and layer these audios in as well. Just make sure to export the audio in wav and I forgot how it's called but in audacity on the bottom on the left there is a number at around 48 000. Turn it to 92 000 or so (I don't remember the exact number). Thus you ensure to not lose any quality.
Kip also has free audios on his YouTube channel but I guess the paid versions are more potent.
 
Siddhanta Yoga She gives one on one sessions and has YouTube  transmissions.
 
- KAP
KAP is explained in this video.
Kap is a transmission to activate the kundalini. KAP leads to kriyas in many participants (there are many different youtube videos where you can see it).
Most people have small movements, some have very big and some none. It usually takes some sessions till movements start. For me they started after around 5 sessions. But they were small/subtle, and stayed that way, and I don't think they might increase more. The movements are mostly subtle pulsatings of the spine.
In the beginning, the movements require some conscious effort, but eventually they kinda happen on their own, without conscious involvement. But they can be stopped at any moment (in 99,9% cases).
From my experience KAP does help to awaken the kundalini. In fact, my biggest kundalini success (when the vibrations finally entered the brain and the big Bliss started) happened during a KAP session (or right after, I don't remember). Despite this I think that purely for a kundalini awakening, Shaktipat is more powerful. 
While KAP does help in kundalini awakening, the focus is one purification. Purification of your energy system as well as emotional purification. Doing KAP before your kundalini awakening will probably result in a more smooth kundalini rising (because of less blockages) (my kundalini awakening was smooth and blissful). That is one benefit of KAP.
If you are someone who is faced with emotional stuff while tripping, I recommend KAP sessions. Similarly to Shamanic Breathing, they purify and release emotional stuff. 
Most people only experience emotional stuff during KAP sessions, and nothing nondual. But that's probably because of their baseline, most of them don't even know about enlightenment. I do experience some subtle effect on nondualness.
The main effect of KAP is longterm baseline. Many people report being more at peace and more blissful.
I think KAP does help for enlightenment, but not as much as other transmissions. The focus of KAP seems to be on personal development (purification and releasing shadow stuff and so on).
On this site is a list of many KAP facilitators, most of them give 1on1 online sessions, and many of them give in person group sessions (if you're lucky to live nearby). And on this site is a list of those who offer online zoom group sessions. I've had KAP with at least 5 different facilitators (group zoom) and while all of them are good, Diana Kasperska is the most skilled. She is a lot more spiritually evolved and seems to be the only one doing enlightenment work. She's also a bit psychic and sometimes perceives some stuff about you during the transmission, like blockages, and then can tell you about it after the transmission. If you book group zoom sessions with Diana, book via her Website  there you (currently) get them 33% cheaper if you book several at once.
 
- Light Transmissions 
Light Transmissions seem to be similar to RASA. Gareth gives Light Transmissions in 1on1 sessions, and says that his Light Transmissions have a similar effect as RASA.
There are many light transmissions on Youtube. I think most of them work well, but I don't think these are as powerful as RASA. The Transmissions from  Imogen seem to stand out, but I assume RASA is still more powerful. Anyway, she gives weekly live transmissions on Youtube and has normal video transmissions. 
 
 
 
 
The different transmissions affect different dimensions of Consciousness:
Predominantly recognition dimension: RASA, Light Transmissions  Predominantly depth/immersion dimension: SAT, Shaktipat, KAP Both dimensions somewhat equally: Pure Divinity, Kai Shanti's transmission  
 
Transmissions can be really powerful to increase your baseline if done over a long period. 
The more you do, the more sensitive you get, and the more powerful they become. My first transmissions (RASA) were all subtle. Only now, after much energy work, immediate effects of transmissions are really strong. Over the time, I've learnt how to channel these transmissions myself, and since maybe 2 weeks, these transmissions are similarly strong for me as those given by someone else. When I receive transmissions from someone else nowadays, I channel myself at the same time, making the session extra potent .
The quickest way to become more sensitive to transmissions is to receive many transmissions. Always let a youtube transmission play during meditation. You can even let them play while doing stuff like reading.
And any energy work in general also benefits that process, especially kriya supreme fire.
 
here  I posted some more YouTube transmissions.
 
The zoom group transmissions are always much cheaper than the 1on1 transmissions, and some are on donation basis. So do maaaany. As many as you can. I used to attend to up to 10 zoom group transmissions a week. (that was a few months ago)
The progress I made since then is crazy. In one month doing all these transmissions I made probably more progress than within the 12 months before that.
The more you do, the more effects you get, except with RASA and Light Transmissions, it seems like doing them more than once a week doesn't speed things up.
All transmissions are different and hit the ego from a different angel, so it is a good idea to do many different ones.
Generally, 1on1 sessions are more powerful than group sessions:
in person (not online) > 1 on 1 session > live zoom > live youtube > normal youtube
 
- How to make a transmission session more powerful:
meditate a few minutes beforehand. I recommend kriya supreme fire (particularly before shaktipat transmissions) try to be receptive Once you are advanced, try to channel the energy at the same time  
For your normal mediation sessions you can experiment with following:
I found that the larger and the closer the screen, the stronger the transmission (but only a subtle difference) It seems that playing several transmission videos at once can make it more powerful. You can use different devices, and open several windows at the same time. I actually mixed more than 10 videos into one new video, I think the software I used is called Filmora9. Doing this really seemed to increase the potency. But sometimes I'm not sure, currently I mainly meditate to single videos. Experiment. You can mix the same video several times, or many different ones.  
 
- Ability to give aura transmissions:
To be able to give the first kind of transmissions, the "aura transmissions", the most important requirement is to have a strong depth/immersion baseline consciousness. The recognition dimension has pretty much no value for that. Apart from that it's also helpful to have a very strong aura, the best practices for that is receiving transmissions, channeling energies and invoking spirits. 
 
 
Share your experiences with transmissions

@Droo_ 
I'm gonna put it that way:
Once you have the K Awakening, it'll be an instant of pure orgasmic bliss. Nothing comes close to it, and you're gonna be in a honeymoon phase. It feels like you're birthed yourself out of bliss.
What then happens is what Daniel Ingram calls the dark night.
Fear-misery-disgust-disenchantment. (dukka nanas)
Fear usually starts right away, because it's so intense you can only freak out. So you'll need to calm yourself. Grounding is essential.
After the honeymoon phase. Your bliss is gone, and you'll see that this existence is meaningless, full of suffering and nothing will ever be able to fulfill you.
This can last for hours to months.
The next things usually happen withing days.
Once you can no longer handle all this bullshit, you'll have the desire for delivrance. It's like an ultimate surrender.
Then you're gonna be in the "reobservation"-phase which is all of the dukka nanas combined.
You're gonna try to navigate them with mindfullness, which is a good thing but nomatter how long you're able to do it, in the end. Re observation always lasts longer than one can handle.
(I remember being in a foetal position and anything I tried to do instantly caused suffering, every intention hurt me)
Then you're gonna end up in equanimity.
In equanimity there's barely any suffering. You're gonna know when you're in it. 

Have you started seeing the futility of this grand, bottomless project of trying to make yourself happy and secured? Has it worked? Are you completely at ease, bliss, secured, without fear and anxiety? If not, what's the percentage of progress you made in this grand project over your 10-20-30-40-50 years of lifetime? Do you see the impossibility of this game which is rigged against you?
Why do you even try? Why do you still believe you can make yourself happy, secured, fulfilled permanently? Why not simply acknowledge and accept the utter fragility of yourself?
Happiness and wellbeing is NOT  something you deserve. When did you buy into this bullshit story? Have you lost your mind? Just look at you!
If you were a Greek god with a lifetime of 10 billion years, who knows no physical or mental exhaustion, who possesses immense prowess and can survive even a planetary destruction; it would be rational to claim that such a being has legit high chance of deserving and claiming happiness, well being and permanent security.
On the other hand look at you! How fragile and vulnerable you are! It takes a zillion things in proper place in your environment and psycholology to make a moment of respite for you while a minor little thing like a virus, temperature, gravity, accident, discomforting thought, tough emotion can legit screw you over. It takes like 15-20 years of healthy childhood, education and environment to have a decent, high esteemed self, while only one traumatic event or imagination can plant a deep imprint in you and screw you over badly for life!
Can you simply let go and accept your vulnerability? Can you let go of this impossible project and assumption that you can actually secure yourself? Can you totally accept your fate for having pain, grief, fear, depression as your usual and natural condition and simply stop trying to make it otherwise? Just look at you trying so hard to build and maintain your sand castles in midst of a gigantic Tsunami. See how easy it is to disturb you and your fickle boundaries..
What happens if you simply give up on chasing this impossible dream? You are already bound to be screwed, right? How worse can it be? Maybe a new dimension will open up if you simply give up and accept your fate?

@Giulio Bevilacqua
There is a therapist who specializes in treating people dealing with Kundaini, Tara Springett, her books helped me a lot with dealing with negative side effects that can come from Kundalini.
She also does online video session with people, although I haven't done one with her before. You might want to consider talking to her, or reading one of her books on dealing with Kundalini. 

Stan Grof is probably the one with the deepest understanding and the most practical experience. He has lots of great books like: The Way of the Psychonaut and LSD Doorway to the Numinous.
Ralph Metzner also has lots of experience with psychedelic therapy and a great summarizing book: ALLIES for AWAKENING Guidelines for productive and safe experiences with entheogens
LSD and the Mind of the Universe by Christopher M. Bache is not particularly about therapy but he uses Stan Grof's methode to explore the mind and you will learn lots of useful stuff in this book.
Entheogenic Liberation: Unraveling the Enigma of Nonduality with 5-MeO-DMT Energetic Therapy by Martin Ball is also helpful even if you don't use 5-MeO-DMT. Also you should check out Marin Balls podcast there are a few episodes where he talks with psychedelic therapists.
You can go down the rabbit hole and find endless stuff and also lots of bad information's so be careful..
If you dive into Stan Grof's work you can't go wrong but as you probably know reading about it and doing it is a totally different thing. Of course it's good to study the literature but this work is highly individual and your experience will most likely be very different from what you have read.
I would suggest to start with long lasting psychedelics in moderate doses like 100ug lsd and then slowly increase the dose over your sessions. The psychedelic will basically teach you everything you have to know but you have to experiment a bit and find whats the best methode for you.
 

@RedLine Jesus this turned into a monster if a text hehe.
Pain is really negative emotion that you are not cognizing as emotion. It's good that you are cognizant of this pain and have some insight to it's nature, most people are too numb to even notice.
All emotions exist in the body. The placement of these emotion are mapped out by the chakra model.
The way to resolve all this is to fully go into the pain, get to know it and then transform it into the positive expression that it seeks to become. It's clogged up energy but it's still energy and thus has tremendous potential. It is seeking to go from its current solid form to a more moving and transforming form which is liquid form, and then to a blissful, spacious, liberated gas form.
This pain will not disappear into nothing but rather unfold into something positive, something you have been seeking for a long time, like grounding, power, self-assertion and self-expression.
This is an intuitive, gentle and intimate process. Using hard shit for this kind of healing is the wrong paradigm. Psychedelics could aid this intimate process, a low dose of something like lsd that doesn't give you hallucinations could be a good aid, but any crazy psychedelics seem unfit for you right now. You can fix all of this sober. With the right understanding, wisdom and techniques you have that power. 
 
If the pain in your chest comes from fear then I would guess that its strongest in your solar plexus and emanates from there. This is a minor chakra that's between the naval and the heart chakra and can negativity impact both when closed. In its open state it's tranquil and serene, in its closed state it's anxious. This functionality is closely related to the root chakra which is in your perineum, near your anus. In its closed state it's fearful and uncomfortable and in it's open state it's grounded, secure and comfortable. For this I recommend the protective bubble technique, it will sooth both chakras.
Protective bubble technique 
Imagine that you are inside a bubble with the diameter of roughly your length. The ball is about 4 inches thick and made out of a transparant material that is glowing with beautiful light. The bubble should be felt as an intelligent energy, rather than dead materia.
Inside this bubble you feel completely safe, embraced, tranquil, joyful and loved. Both feel these qualities emanate from within you and feel like you are receiving this from the bubble.
The walls of the bubble are semi permeable, good energy such as love and joy flow freely through the walls. But negative energy such as domination, suppression, unloving expectations or anything that is less than completely loving and accepting, is kept out by the walls. I’m talking about negative energy both from people and our thoughts, perhaps the idea of our mother or father.
This bubble subconsciously symbolizes your boundaries.
If negative energy gets through the walls against you will, it might be a sign that you need to set and articulate boundaries in relation to the negative entity. This is a function of the throat chakra. In your head, talk to the intruding entity, be intuitive. Ask it what it wants and establish boundaries with it. Listen to what the entity wants but don't comprise with it. Try to articulate why it's wrong. Let love be the mediator here.
If the bubble feels limiting in any way that means that you are not letting good energy flow through it. Let go of the limiting feeling but keep the healthy boundaries.
The visualization itself is only a tool to get in touch with the subtle sense of how your boundaries should be. Keep the subtle sense and the attitude throughout the day.
The point of this is to cultivate healthy boundaries and the attitude that we won’t tolerate negative energy, boundary violations or threats from the outside. There is absolutely no good reason to ever be affected by other people’s unloving, negative energy. There is no good reason to not be fully happy right now! It’s about allowing yourself a level of happiness that is unwisely seen as unacceptable by others and our culture.
When you have established a health bubble, just sit and bask is self-love, self-acceptance and happiness, while protected by the bubble.
You can stay an bask in this wellbeing or you can continue into the other techniques.
The contracting of the throat is the throat chakra. As you know, it's repressed stuff. You have things that you want to say and it remedy is to say it.
Self-expression technique - can be done after establishing the protective bubble or by itself.
In your head, say the things that you hold back or anything that pop into your mind. Some key words here are "I feel ...", "I want ..." And "I like ...".
Example: "When this person did that I felt unloved and betrayed. I want him to apologize and I feel resentful that he hasn't."
Like this you articulate in your mind clearly whatever you are thinking. Let it be a stream. Really get into it. 
As you keep going you might want say things aloud. Let the process evolve naturally. Whatever works for you is the right way to do it. When you really get into it you might want to scream and shake and go crazy as your energy gets unstuck. That is progress you don't have to verbalize your screaming but definitely flow with the energy and don't suppress it energetically. When you have purified your emotions you will eventually find that these emotions have clouded a profound gratitude that will reveal itself. Don't force it. Express good things if it comes naturally.
Pay extra attention to your throat while doing this. You can try to incorporate the breath into this by breathing deeply and relaxing your throat and do the self expression on the out-breath.
Start with this exercise as it will begin to purify your other stuck energy, not only your throat chakra.
I'm guessing the reason you have become accustomed to suppressing yourself is because your parents suppressed your will and your expression of that will as a child. A suppressed will is an angry will. So some of your anger might be directly liked to this suppression and might be remedied by the self-expression technique.
 
The bubble and the expression technique should dissolve some of your blockages but probably not all of it. For that you should get into the chakra and open it to it's happy state.
Overview of chakra system, find more precise placement of chakras on google:
Chakra name Solid, closed, repressed state, passive Liquid, closed but active and transforming state, has a will to seek catharsis in gas state Gas, open, happy, blissful, cathartic Element(the solid, liquid, gas form of energy is only metaphorical and not related to element which is a deep aspect of our psyche and cognition) Root  Ungrounded Fearful Grounded, secure Earth/physicality Sacral Alienated, lonely Horny, approval seeking Embracing, passionate, lively, connected, orgasm Water/movement Navel Submissive, victim complex Angry Joyful, benevolent power Sun/warmth, change, vitality Solar plexus(minor chakra) Withdrawn Anxiety Tranquility, serenity None Wish tree (minor chakra, located right under heart chakra and is connected to it and it's love. Many think these are one and the same chakra and they almost are, so you can see this as an aspect of love) Nihilistic Longing Fulfilled, purposeful None Heart Apathic Hatred Loving, healing Air/spaciousness, sky Throat - doesn't have an emotion in itself but is rather a conduit for previous chakras Suppressing  Expressing discontent Expressing content, gratitude Ether - irrelevant Head - also doesn't have an emotion in itself. Is the ego itself, the master chakra. All other chakras are mirrored here as thoughts and are controlled from here.  Unconscious Dualistic, ego awareness, closed-mindedness, dissociation Non-dual, boundless awareness, happiness, open-mindedness None Crown - melting together with the cosmos - irrelevant in this context All chakras influence the others and all are effected by physical conditions like lack of sleep or poor nutrition. So your healing won't take as long for every chakra as when you open one you positively impact the others. The heart chakra has the biggest impact on the overall system as it's the healing chakra. So you want to fist focus on the heart chakra to then use its love in healing the other chakras.
 
You wrote that the chest pain also is anger which I would guess is actually felt strongest lower down around your navel area and parallel vertebrae. You wrote that you also experience anger in your head. This is a missing of the anger in your navel chakra. All lower chakras are mirrored in our head as thoughts. If the energy is stuck in our head tho I would think it means the anger is combined with dissociation from the anger. This is healed by going into the anger and resolving it instead of avoiding it. Own up to the anger instead of casting it to the shadow.
Use this technique to open the remaining chakras (although use the previous technique for the throat chakra):
Chakra catharsis release technique - can be done after establishing protective bubble or by itself
Choose a chakra to work on, this can be changed after a while i you like. Find where in this area you feel the most energy, either in solid, painful form or in liquid form.
Take a deep breath. On the in-breath, bring up the liquid form of the chakra you are working on the most energy-dense point. Feel the energy radiate outwards from this point and don't restrict the energy to this point at all. Make it as intense as possible, the intenser the liquid form, the more solid energy is transformed to liquid, and the stronger the eventual catharsis. 
On the out-breath transform the liquid form into its cathartic gas form. The liquid form has a seed of the gas form in it. Find that positive crenel in the liquid form and go into it while letting go of the negative aspects of the liquid form.
There are two additions to add to the out-breath step that you can add when you got the hang of the basic technique:
Combine the positive expression of the chakra with love. This turns root chakra comfort and security to flourishing, sacral chakra pleasure into loving embrace, naval chakra joy into generous nourishing, and head chakra awareness into loving surrender. On the out-breath also tune in to the chakras element. Root chakra: tune in to the physicality of earth, the space you are in and your body sitting on earth, feel grounded. Sacral chakra: tune in to the water element, it's a warm and embracing water, feel it all around. Feel the density of the water. The world is in constant cyclical movement like ebb and flow. Flow with the world, breath with that flow and feel your stomach and chest expand and contract. The water element is what connects us with the world. Feel that connection with nature as you breath with the world. Just like nature ebbs, flows, turns from night to day your body ebbs and flows with the breath. Like Bruce Lee said: Be like water my friend. Naval chakra: feel a sun in your belly, radiating your powerful love outwards, warming and nourishing the entire world with it's blindingly bright light.  Heart chakra: tune in to spaciousness. The spaciousness of the room you are in, of your body and lungs. Imagine your body being hollow. Breath the spaciousness, breath love and feel how spacious love is. Feel how still and how peaceful it is. Breath deeply. Feel that spaciousness expand infinitely. It's soothing. It's indestructible.  Let's use the navel chakra as an example, on the in-breath feel a powerful anger radiating from your gut. On the out-breath find the kernel of joy and benevolent power in the anger and go into the happiness of that while letting go of the painful negative aspects of the anger. As you breath out you radiate that cathartic, powerful joy.
Hold the out-breath for as long as comfortable and just bask in the bliss of the positive expression(gas form) of the chakra.
Once you have gotten in to the positive open gas form of the energy, stay with that on the in-breath too and forget about the liquid form if it feels right.
It can be a bit tricky to get this technique right, there are many subtle distinctions to make and you have to experiment a bit to get this all right. Take this process in your own hands and follow your intuition. Whatever feels right to you is what you should do.
Be a little careful with going into the power of the navel chakra as it can increase your overall prana and make the painful chakras even more painful. If you feel this happening, then focus more on the blissful joy side of the chakra and less so on the power side of the chakra. Or switch your focus entirely to dissolve other pain or focus more on the heart chakra.
For more information on these techniques and more complementary techniques, I highly recommend 5-Minute Miracle by Tara Springett.
Pro tip: make the last meal before doing these exercises only fruit, preferably water rich fruit. Fruits are the most prana rich foods on the planet and will get your energies moving. I myself am enjoying good vibes and high energy on an entirely fruitarian diet.
I'm glad you reached out with this because everything is healable and everyone deserves healing. Hope all this is insightful and helps. Let me know how these techniques work for you or if they don't, or if you have any questions. 
Lastly here is a great song about life and healing: https://youtu.be/sg209CadVQM
 

A place for discussions and experiments about energy work.
Topics might include:
developing the energy body channeling energy energy sensitivity yoga, chakras, kundalini  

Being able to remain conscious during all sleep stages is the ultimate skill. This will open doors to almost anything.
- Introduction
When people want to have a deep meditation, they either try to:
(A) lower their brainwaves, and thus make their consciousness more non-dual. This includes techniques like: Kriya yoga, trance, hypnosis and the majority of all meditation techniques. (B) directly make their consciousness more non-dual. This includes contemplation and self inquiry.  When people try to get into lower brainwaves, they usually start from their everyday waking consciousness. This works, but it will take ages (lifetimes for most people) till you get into really deep brainwaves - even if you do very direct techniques like trance.
We already spend 8 hours each day in very deep brainwaves. Why not take advantage of that? So rather than trying to bring lower brainwaves to waking cosnciousness (tirelessly trying to lower your brainwaves during the day), we can try to bring consciousness to lower brainwaves. 
That is sleep yoga.
 
- Benefits of Sleep Yoga
All of your dreams will be lucid (2 hours each night) During the rest of the night (light and deep sleep) you can either abide in deep non-dual awareness (by far deeper than any normal meditations), or astral project as much as you like. You gain 8 hours each day (~ 3 000 hours each year) No lapse of consciousness upon physical death.  
This is obviously very significant for enlightenment. Apart from that, it will benefit you in so many ways. Merely the 2 hours of lucid dreaming each night will radically transform your psyche. Here I wrote about reasons why to bother about OBEs: 
 
- Difficulty
Monks usually require many years of training till they are able to remain conscious during sleep. It takes long because their techniques are not Fire. They usually consist of standard meditation, waking up a couple of times during the night and visualization techniques.
I've lately done a lot of research and experimenting and tried to combine all the hacks and tricks I found. This should make the process a lot quicker.
Before I get to the technique, let's first lay a foundation. (or jump to "Chapter 2: The Technique")
 
Chapter 1 : Sleep - 1. Basics
During the night you go through several sleep cycles, each around 90 minutes long. Sleep cycles consists of:
- N1( light sleep). Only when falling asleep.
- N2 (light sleep):
Usually around 50-60% of your sleep. N2 is the ideal sleep stage to wake up from - N3 (deep sleep = SWS = slow wave sleep):
Important for regeneration Around 20-25 % of your sleep. You need typically 60-120 minutes of SWS. defined as having more than 20% of delta brain waves.  Majority of SWS during your first few sleep cycles - REM  (rapid eye movement) :
Here you have most of your dreams brainwaves somewhat similar to your waking state sleep paralysis so you don't act out your dreams 20-25% of your night  you need 60-90 min of REM As the night progresses, each sleep cycle contains more and more REM A sleep cycle usually begins with N2. Then N3 then N2 again and then REM.
 
- 2. Segmented Sleep
About polyphasic Sleep: https://www.polyphasic.net/introduction-to-polyphasic-sleep .
Segmented sleep means dividing your sleep into 2 segments: See https://www.polyphasic.net/schedules/biphasic/ and https://www.polyphasic.net/schedules/dual-core/ .
SWS peak is usually at 9-12 pm. And REM peak is at 6-9 am. Sleeping during these times means most efficient SWS and REM. More about that here: https://www.polyphasic.net/sleep-mechanics/biological-rhythms/ and here: https://www.polyphasic.net/blog/three-noons-and-their-importance-to-determining-the-shift-in-circadian-rhythms/
 
- 2.1 Benefits of segmented sleep:
Having a REM core with little or no SWS is perfect for trying to learn sleep yoga, more on that later You have a heightened likelihood for lucid dreaming during the REM core because of the high REM percentage and the long time awake after your SWS core. You basically have a very long WBTB (wake back to bed). The longer a WBTB, the more effective.  Prolactin surge benefits: https://www.mattressnerd.com/polyphasic-sleep/overviews/segmented-sleep/ If you sleep monophasically, you can't cover both SWS and REM peaks. Thus segmented sleep is more efficient. ... therefore you need less total amount of sleep Yogis say that the time at around 3-5 am is most valuable for meditation If you usually sleep 8 hours, you could schedule a 3 h SWS core and a 4.5 h REM core.
The time between the SWS and REM core should be at least 2 hours. Ideally 3-4 hours. Otherwise your body treats it as interrupted sleep rather than segmented sleep and you don't get all the benefits. More time between your cores also means that you cover more of the SWS and REM peak.
Segmented sleep is not something to do occasionally. You need to do it every night, otherwise you will just be tired and not get all the benefits. Your body needs 1-2 weeks to adapt to the schedule.
Segmented sleep is not necessary, but it can help a lot. Alternatively, you could just sleep for 4-6 hours and then either add a normal WBTB or just go straight to the techniques.
 
- 3. SWS Core
- 3.1 Binaural beats
If you listen to delta binaural beats, you increase the duration and depth (decrease the brainwave frequency even further) of your SWS. For example, in this study ( https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnhum.2018.00387/full )   they played 3 Hz delta binaural beats when the subjects were in N2. Thus, some N2 turned into N3. The length of N3 increased by 30% (N3 length of first two nights without binaural beats was 93 min. On the next night, with binaurals, N3 was 126 min). The subjects were probably new to binaural beats. If you have already trained your brain with binaural beats, the effect could possibly be even more drastic.
Using a sleep tracking device might be helpful to keep track of your SWS.
I recommend you try the binaural beats from Jody Hatton. Either on youtube:   
or on his website. you decide the price for a download.
Sleeping with headphones might not be the most comfortable. But it can be worth it. Delta binaural beats are only interesting for your SWS core. Instead of over ear headphones, you could also use headband headphones like these: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014T3QLBA/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=9td9sm-5xsk-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B014T3QLBA&linkId=82c4b0488d4ece45af2f57a9ea6427c0. they are more comfortable to sleep with. But might have lower quality.
I don't recommend opting for isochronic tones for delta sleep. They do have the benefit of not neading headphones, but they are said to be inefficient to entrain you to delta brainwaves.
- 3.2 Melatonin
Melatonin is important for SWS. How to optimize Melatonin levels:
Only red lights 2-3 hours before bed (or no light). You can buy red light. Or wear blue light blocking glasses (preferably should block green light as well) or use apps on your mobile phone and pc (for example "Flux") which filter blue light. Sleep in total darkness. Either buy something to block all light from your windows or just take a huge sheet of black carton and tape it over your window. Thats what I do. It takes around 1 minute each morning and night to tape/remove. You could also use a sleep mask. But then, a small amount of light is still registered by your skin. But that is probably negligible. enough (sun)light during the day. decalcify your pineal gland fasting can increase melatonin levels as well. - 3.3 Schedule
For our sleep yoga practice, we prefer to have all our SWS during the SWS core. So the REM core can be fully dedicated to Sleep yoga practices.
If you want to get the most out of each night, you also want to have as little light sleep and REM during your SWS core. You want these in your REM core so your REM core is longer and you have more time to practice each night (First we learn to be conscious during light sleep and REM, and only then do we try it during SWS). Depending on your personal SWS needs (which can vary a lot) and depending on how well you can optimize a sleep cycle for maximum SWS, you can choose following SWS core lengths.
6h: easy 4.5h: Healthy and comfortable  3h: for serious practitioners 1.5h: not recommended  I think you don't need to strictly schedule according to the 90 min sleep cycle rythm. You can extend it if you want.
A very unrecommended polyphasic sleep schedule - Everyman 4 : https://www.polyphasic.net/schedules/everyman/  - has only one 90 minute SWS core plus 4 short naps for REM. Someone who follows that schedule tries to get all 90 minutes of SWS requirement into the 90 minute core, which is close to impossible. For our use, if you perfectly optimized it and extended the length from 90 to 100-110 minutes, you might be able to get 70-90 min SWS into a 110 min SWS core. But beware, if you shorten your SWS core too much, you risk SWS creeping in to your REM core.
 
- 4. Core Gap
Once your body adapted to the new schedule, you won't be as tired during it After spending some minutes on my mobile phone, I'm fully awake. Make sure your devices block blue light. And I use a red light. And I also listen to gamma binaural beats. I like these: https://www.brainwave3d.com/spiritualitaet/erleuchtung/38/the-gateway-to-enlightenment-das-tor-zur-erleuchtung?c=30 and  https://www.brainwave3d.com/meditation/tiefenmeditation-fuer-profis/96/god-consciousness-gott-erleben?c=30 and  https://www.brainwave3d.com/psi-faehigkeiten/dmt/98/mystical-dmt-trip-erlebe-eine-intensive-dmt-erfahrung?c=34 (Use google translate for the website.) The "core gap" is a good time for meditative practces, just make sure you don't fall asleep. If you are likely to fall asleep during meditation, then do it right at the beginning or end of the core gap. So you still have at least 2 hours of continued wakefulness. I recommend spending a few minutes of hard-core concentration at the end of your core gap, as a preparation for your REM core practice.  
- 5. REM Core
-5.1 Basics
Your REM core should ideally consist of only light sleep and REM. Consider:
Getting enough SWS during your SWS core Having your REM core during or close after the REM peak Applying tricks for lighter sleep You will set MANY alarms which wake you up all the time, giving you plenty of opportunitues and optimal conditions to practice.
 
- 5.2 Gamma brain waves
I believe they are the key for being conscious during sleep. Monks have increased gamma acrivity during non-REM sleep: https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0073417#pone-0073417-g001 .  The significance of 40 Hz for lucid dreaming:  https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.zmescience.com/medicine/mind-and-brain/lucid-dreaming-electrical-trigger-042342/amp/ . I guess, the main difference of brainwaves during sleep, between a sleep yogi and a normal person, is gamma activity. The more gamma (and beta) you have, the more alert/aware you are. So if we want to be aware during sleep, we need more gamma during sleep.
How to have more gamma during sleep:
gamma brainwave entrainment audios during sleep.   Applying the tools for having"Lighter Sleep" (more on that later) day-time meditation practices (more on that later)  
- 5.3 Schedule
If you are concerned about your sleep, then do the practices only for 1-3h, and then turn off all alarms, go back to sleep and sleep as long as your body wants. Depending on how easily you tend to fall asleep on any given day, you spontaneuosly decide for the right amount of "lighter sleep" tools.  
- 6. Lighter Sleep
- 6.1 Benefits
You are closer to the awake/asleep threshold. That means a) it is easier to retain consciousness while falling asleep and b) it is easier to stay in that state. The deeper your sleep gets, the greater the risk of losing consciousness decreased risk of SWS creeping in increased likelihood for DILDs, WILDs and DEILDs better dream recall  - 6.2 How to have lighter sleep:
- 6.2.1 Body Position:
Level1: Turn in bed 180 degrees. So your head is now where your feet used to be. Level 2: lie on the floor.  Level 3: Be in an inclined position. for example of 60 degrees. https://www.theminimalists.com/drew/  Level 4: Sleep sitting upright with head support.  Level 5: Upright with no head support. That is particularly good, because everytime you fall asleep, your head drops and wakes you up. Thus it is easier to get closer to the awake/asleep threshold. - 6.2.2 Noise
Tv or music.  listen to a hypnosis audios about falling asleep.  
- 6.2.3 Gamma brainwave entrainment:
I listen to these binaural beats during my REM Core:   https://www.iawaketechnologies.com/product/gammaburst/ . You can cutt off the beginning and end so that it's only in the relevant frequency of 25-45 Hz. I listen them during my whole REM core. Another option are these 40 Hz isochronic tones: https://www.iawaketechnologies.com/product/gamma-40/ . But I only listened to them once, I found the binaural beats more effective. But they have the advantage of not needing headphones. - 6.2.3 Discomfort.
Level 1: wearing headphones Level 2: Add any discomfort you can think of Level 3: Hold your arm up vertically. Ellbow supported on the matress. https://www.dreamviews.com/attaining-lucidity/107214-wild-awareness-training.html - 6.2.4 Alarm clocks
Level 1: Every 15-30 min. It turns itself off. So you have a lower likelihood of waking up if you are in a somewhat deeper sleep.  Level 2: Every 8-12 min. Alarm needs to be manually turned off. (you press snooze. So it will ring in a few minutes again) Level 3: Every 3-8 min. Alarm needs to be manually turned off Some alarm clock apps are able to play the alarm through your headphones only.
- 6.2.5 Light: 
Level 1: Leave on some red light Level 2: Remove your curtains from the windows just before your REM core Level 3: Turn on artificial light. Light will have a negative impact on your melatonin levels. In terms of melatonin, we are most concerned about it's effects on SWS sleep. So light after your SWS sleep is relatively fine. It is recommended that one spends 8-10 hours in darkness (or at least red light rather than blue light) each day. So if you turn off normal lighting 3 h before your SWS core, then have a 3 h SWS core, followed by a 3 h core gap, you have 9h.
- 6.2.6 Others:
Intention  uncomfortable temperature   
 
Chapter 2: The Technique Our approach consists of:
SWS Core Core Gap REM Core + Alarm Clocks  and there you practice "Conscious Falling Asleep"  
- 1. Getting yourself closer to sleep
Some tips:
Reverse Blinking. Thats very effective to get tired very quickly. Close your eyes for 2-7 seconds, then open them briefly. Continue till you are very tired. https://www.dreamviews.com/attaining-lucidity/24607-inducing-trance-wild-part-1-a.html Hypnotic suggestions/affirmations "sleepy" Concentrate on the "sleepiness" sensation and deepen it Pretend having fallen asleep  
- 2. Awake/Asleep Threshold Tools
Everything I listed under "Lighter Sleep" can be helpful to remain conscious during the awake/asleep threshold. Particularly powerful is:
Holding up your arm vertically, ellbow resting on the mattress. Sleeping sitting without head support. When you fall asleep, your arm or head will sink/fall down and wake you up.
 
- 3. Deepen your Trance
When trying to fall asleep, you are basically in trance. When you deepen your trance, you get your body closer to sleep. But apart from that it also alters your consciousness in a different way (than just using normal tips like those listed under "getting yourself closer to sleep") which can be helpful for conscious falling asleep.
- Tips for deepening your trance:
Falling sensation. Either visualize how you are somewhere else - in a visualized body - and experience a falling sensation there (literally falling, going down steps, elevator, etc...) or 'stay' with your consciousness in your physical body and visualize the falling sensation there (I personally prefer that). Try to visualize the sensation you have in your gut when being on a roller coster.  
Use Hypnosis. Here I wrote in detail about hypnosis (keep in mind, when I wrote older posts, I had less understanding):   
Use your Hypnotic Triggers. You can anchor every state of consciousness. so for example anchor being sleepy with the word "sleepy", or anchor going into a deep trance with visualizing going downstairs. Hypnotic Triggers are like key words for your subconscious that tell it what state of consciousness to produce.  
Visualize it into being. Visualize how you are in a very deep trance. Visualize having no more body sensations and being in the void. It's hard to expplain how exactly to do it, but it works.  
Visualize how you are expanding. Expand your consciousness to include your room, then house, etc. It is said that this produces more theta brainwaves   
 
Fractionation: A hypnotic induction technique. The idea is to get out of trance and then immediately go back down. If done skillfully, you will end up deeper than where you started.  One way to do it is to count from 1 to 3 (feeling how you are getting more out of trance with every number), open your eyes, count down from 3 to 1 (feeling how you are getting deeper), and closing your eyes again.  
Dissociation from the body. Some possibilities: Pretend that you are lying in bed upside down. Your head where  your feet used to be. Till you are actually convinced. The axis going from your feet to your head. Visualize turning around that axis. Like you are rolling in bed.  Visualize how you are in a visualized body in your room. Turn around and look at your physical body  
Try to induce the sensations of your body: becoming heavy.  quickly shrinking, expanding, shrinking, expanding, .... feeling strange  becoming weightless having no sensations melting with the room fading out of existence  
Completely surrender. And use some of your non-dual hypnotic triggers  
Visualize how you are in a visualized body somewhere. For example in your kitchen. Try to immerse yourself in these visualizations as much as possible. This produces deep theta brainwaves. And the more often you change your environment (particularly using doors, floors, etc) the more theta brainwaves are produced. So they say at least.  
some say looking up with your eyes to the 3rd eye helps  
Amnesia: Try to forget your body. Forget the physical universe  
Pretend like you are moving your astral arm. And you could try any OBE exit technique  
All of these could also induce an OBE. If they do, great, but their actual purpose is to help in conscious falling asleep.
 
- 4. Anchors
In order to remain conscious while your body falls asleep, it's recommended to have an anchor to focus on. (In past posts I used the word "anchor" as being a trigger for a state of consciousness. To avoid confusion, I use in this post "hypnotic trigger" for that instead). 
- Anchors:
any mantra works but for our purpose I would use sth like "mind awake, body asleep" so you also benefit from its affirmative effect. Awareness itself. just try to remain conscious Any trance deepeners The True Self Hypnagogic images or sounds counting your breath chakras any sensations  visualizations  
- 5. FILD
Finger induced Lucid Dreaming. It is usually used as a form of DEILD (or WILD) in order to induce a lucid dream. The technique is very effective at keeping you awake while your body falls asleep. Lucid dreamers use it to lucid dream, but we can just as well use it for general conscious falling asleep. I actually believe that this might be the key for conscious falling asleep (in combination with the other points I wrote).
You alternate slightly moving your middle and index finger of one hand. As if playing piano. The movement must be extremely tiny. Just keep doing it and decrease the range of motion. Eventually your fingers shouldn't be moving any more at all (or only less than a millimeter). But the information to move is still delivered to your fingers. The tendons and muscles might be moving or tensing slightly. You find more detailed tutorials on the internet, like:  https://www.dreamviews.com/induction-techniques/36683-finger-induced-lucid-dream-fild.html And on reddit are countless FILD threads as well, including impressive success stories.
You could say FILD, is just another anchor. But I believe it is more powerful than other anchors. Actually moving a body part seems to keep the mind more awake (perhaps by activating an additional/different brain region). And the movement is so tiny that it doesn't prevent your body from falling asleep.
For the purpose of lucid dreaming, FILD is usually only done for 20-120 seconds (then you should just fall asleep and try later again). But we will just keep wiggling until we made the transition.
 
- 6. Reviewing the keys
The following points are the most significant. Most monks are not aware of them, that's why we can achieve sleep yoga quicker.
REM core without SWS MANY alarm clocks Gamma brainwave training Reverse Blinking  awake/asleep threshold tools (hand up, sitting + no head support) Trance deepeners FILD   
Our goal is that the body falls asleep, while retaining consciousness. For that to happen the body must be tired (which is achieved by the many alarm clocks, when they wake you up, your body is still in sleep mode and wants to return as quickly as possible. And by reverse blinking, trance deepeners and by sleep deprivation, in case you end up being sleep deprived) while your mind must be alert (which is achieved through the "lighter sleep" tools and anchors). To achieve that, some astral projectors, would go for one night without sleep (body tired) and then trink coffee (mind alert) before going to sleep the next day.
 
- 7.  Simplified Technique Overview
Upon waking you do either of these (or a combination):
Just try to remain conscious while your body falls asleep awake/asleep threshold tools Trance deepeners focus on anchors FILD  
- 8. Tips 
You can also experiment with using strong intention. Jus don't allow your mind to fall asleep.  You need balance between concentrating too tightly and too loosely If you notice you are about to lose consciousness, open your eyes. Regain consciousness and then close them while using your hypnotic triggers. This sudden fractionation could be enough to send your body one step closer to sleep whlile retaining consciousness  You can switch between sitting and lying during your REM core Reverse FILD: Suddenly stop the finger movements and pretend you fell asleep. https://www.dreamviews.com/wake-initiated-lucid-dreams-wild/101305-reverse-fild-technique-100%-success-out-4-attempts-so-far.html When you can't fall asleep during your REM core, keep being conscious and see it as awareness practice, thus no time is wasted It's very easy to end up half-heartedly doing the technique upon waking up and then very quickly fall back asleep. When you wake up, strengthen your intention and determination first.  
 
Chapter 3: Daily Practices - 1. Conscious falling asleep (during your REM core)
- 2. Perfect concentration
When you are very alert and have perfect concentration you produce more gamma brainwaves. Spend every day 5-10 min of perfect forced concentration. Don't allow thoughts. Don't allow anything other than what you are focusing on. 
I usually focus on being extremely alert. Alert of whether there are thoughts. If a thought appears immediately cut it off. Don't even allow subtle thoughts. 
You can also listen to gamma brainwave entrainment at the same time.
- 3. Relaxed awareness 
Spend every day 5-15 min doing relaxed awareness. The objective is to stay aware. And allow everything to happen.  Allow all thoughts and passively observe them. That's alpha brainwaves (and some theta).  But don't lose your awareness. Aim for zero lapse of awareness. That's the gamma (and beta) brainwaves.
This is the sate of mind you need during conscious falling asleep. Relaxed and passive, yet uninterrupted awareness.
 
- 4. ADA periods
Doing all day awareness (ada) surely helps for conscious falling asleep but I don't think ada is worth the effort. Effort/Benefit ratio is poor. 
Instead, I recommend you do ada only for a short period - like 2 to 10 minutes - around 1-3 times a day. Perhaps while driving, cooking, exercising. Just do your normal activity while trying to stay conscious.
 
- 5. Binaural beats during the day
All the above practices develop your gamma brainwave skills. Additionally you can listen to gamma (and other frequencies) brainwave entrainment while doing daily activities like reading, cooking, etc. I wrote about that here: 
 
- 6. LOA Visualizations 
Visualize everyday for 1-3 min how you are successful at sleep yoga. Know that this is true. If your memories say otherwise, regard them as false memories.
You can apply all LOA stuff for sleep yoga. Here i mentioned some more LOA stuff: 
 
 
- 7. Trance 
Trance practice is not required but can be helpful.
- 7.1 Procedure
Strengthen your intention and LOA visualize how your session will unfold Get to your awake/tired sweet spot: (Reverse Blinking, hypnotic trigger, suggestions) Body relaxation: body scan, progressive muscle relaxation, tensing/relaxing muscles, visualize a light relaxing your muscles. You could also stretch, move and massage some muscles beforehand) Mental Relaxation Hypnotic suggestions Trance Deepeners and using your Hypnotic Triggers Listening to Guided Hypnosis or freestyle.
0-60 min each day, as you believe necessary.
 
- 7.2 Tips
body and mind relaxation is crucial. it is the foundation for altered sates. Don't wave them aside, thinking they are not worth doing. I made that mistake and wasted a lot of time therefore. Once I realized the importance of body relaxation, I spent a few days - 2-4 hours each day - only trying to relax the body.  The objective is to get alpha and theta brainwaves. So practice when you are tired, because then it is far easier to enter these brainwaves. Find your sweet spot, of tired enough but still able to resist falling asleep. Exhaustion. It has a similiar effect like being tired. Hypnotic suggestions are more easily absorbed and it is easier to surrender into trance. Here I wrote more about exhaustion, including it's value in terms of enlightenment:  Use hypnosis (see my hypnosis thread) Use brainwave entrainment   
 
Chapter 4: Stages of Progress  
- Stage 1
Getting close to the awake/asleep threshold for brief moments, but then being immediately snapped back
- Stage 2
Able to stay conscious while the body falls asleep. But after a few moments, you either lose consciousness or are snapped back.
- Stage 3 
Able to reliable stay conscious while the body falls asleep (during your REM core of course) and smoothly transition into a lucid dream.
- Stage 4
Able to enter the void. No, or almost no sensations of your body left
- Stage 5
Able to remain in this void during your whole REM core (both light sleep and REM)
- Stage 6
You stopped your segmented sleep schedule. You can retain consciousness while sinking into deep sleep, but are not able to hold it there for long
- Stage 7
Able to stay conscious during the whole night
- Stage 8
Able to enter epsilon brainwaves during deep sleep without losing consciousness 
- Stage 9
Able to enter the exact same depth, in your meditation during the day, when you are not tired.
- Stage 10
Able to do that in less than 5 minutes.
- Stage 11
Able to do that while sitting
- Stage 12
Able to do that while walking. You are able to split your consciousness. One part is astral projecting on Mars, while a small portion of your consciousness remains in your physical body, cleaning the kitchen.
 
 
Chapter 5: Resources and Notes - 1. Resources
There is not much information out there about Dream Yoga.
- In this post I mentioned it a bit: 
 
- Books:
Dream Yoga by Andrew Holecek The Tibetan yogas of dream and sleep by Tenzin Wangyal Dreaming Yourself Awake by B. Alan Wallace. - Forum posts: https://www.dreamviews.com/beyond-dreaming/142072-exploring-delta-sleep.html
- A Website: http://www.swamij.com/yoga-nidra.htm
 
- 2. Depth of Sleep Yoga
Some reports of being conscious during sleep, don't appear as fantastic as one would expect. I guess it's the same as with psychedelics. The average person might take 700 ug of LSD without getting nondual, while a spiritual seeker might get completely blown away by 300 ug. How deep your mystical experiences are (for psychedelics and sleep yoga alike) depends on many factors but the biggest are:
your baseline consciousness  self-inquiry / contemplation skills surrender skills intention (for pyschedelics, there are some more, like personal tolerance etc).
 
- 3. My progress so far
I had tried WILD a few times a year ago with zero success.
I have done quite a lot of meditation during the past 2 years. But I don't think this is required or provides a huge advantage compared to someone who hasn't done any meditation so far. A few months of the above-mentioned Sleep yoga practice, is more valuable in terms of sleep yoga progress than 3 years of meditation.
I started my sleep yoga practice around 3 weeks ago. My attention has been mainly on figuring out the right technique/schedule rather than trying to actually achieve sleep yoga (but I did try, of course). Now I'm finally somewhat satisfied with the technique, so the real practice starts tomorrow.
So far I'm roughly at progress stage 1. 
I'm gonna keep updating.

This video is a good primer, but here is a full official breakdown of the exercises :
 

I've spent my whole life in masculinity and doing quite well at it. However I feel that's not the whole story, I feel I could have a better balance.
How do I get in touch with and embody feminine energy as a man?
Note, that I'm not talking about sexual orientation, attraction or finding a woman.

Hi there,
TL;DR in bold.
So I am just back from a solo meditation retreat. I wanted to go to Vipassana, but with all the surges in Covid cases in my country in the last weeks I had thought it might not be the brightest idea, so my room it is.
It started out as a mixed Vipassana/Kriya retreat, but slowly evolved into Kriya-based one. Yes, I am no good at sticking to the plan. Typical INFP guy here.
My Vipassana technique of choice was Shinzen Young's mindfulness with labeling, the "See, Hear, Feel" method. I like it more than the body scaning technique they teach at Goenka's Vipassana retreats. Shinzen Young is an inspiring person, too. It's thanks to him that I started to question if I am not undervaluing stuff like insight mediation and should give it more effort.
My Kriya routine is (I have had almost a year of a gap in practicing it and I am just getting back on track since the 1st January, practicing daily):
Preliminary Kriya Supreme Fire up to 20 minuntes Maha Mudra 3-12x SantataGamana's/Mukherjee's Kriya Pranayama with concentration at the Third-Eye 108-144x Self-Inquiry or concentration for 20-40 minutes at the end.  
It takes up to 1 h 30 min to complete.
For Kriya Supreme Fire I use Wim Hof-like technique of doing 30 short, sharp inhales and exhales to oxygenate the body, It's super easy to hit 1 min 30 s or 2 min that way. I remember that using this technique I was able to hold breath for 3 minutes in year 2019. So I think that I will switch to full Kriya Supreme Fire soon after the retreat.
I had a problem with Vipassana. The problem was I had been constantly falling asleep and lucid dreaming or simply dreaming instead of actually meditating. So 2-hours meditation sit was effectively more like a 1-1.5 hour sit. I even had a dream of me meditating in one place and then after waking up I saw that I am in a completely different place. And I was like, "duh, why is it happening to me?"
I know why, it's because I had constantly been laying on the floor with a straight back to give my legs and knees a rest, but it turns out I am godlike at falling asleep at completely flat, uncomfortable floors. But I had to, the knees got such a beating before I started this retreat (I went biking for the first time this year and kind of got carried away), that I didn't want to risk any injury.
That's why I have switched to yoga only. You can't fall asleep doing yoga (probably, haha).
Here is my schedule for the first 2 days:
It's basically appropiated Goenka's Vipassana schedlue. I didn't know what I was doing when planning this up, just went with my mojo and put stuff in there. Too much physical exercise.
I had set up timers on my phone to remind me of the schedule and put it into extra-battery saving mode.
I then went to improve it for the next two days:
This was better, but still not right. The lesson I have learned is that doing Kriya that close before sleep can make falling asleep more difficult, yet I haven't corrected it during this retreat.
The schedule I sticked to the end of the retreat is such:
Yup, that's 400-600 Kriya Pranayamas a day. But I think this was still ineffective use of time. If I had to start again, I would cut physical yoga asanas (Iyengar) to 1h maximum. Do more sessions of Kriya, aiming for 800-1000 a day, no psychedelics. I would also try to all the Pranayamas as early in the day as possible, to crowd them in the morning and early afternoon. That would be it for a Kriya-themed retreat.
I will for sure experiment with other formats, like semi-retreat when I do yoga intensively in the morning and then go about the day as usual, work, etc., for a month. Or do 1-day intensives with 1728 pranyamas on Sundays, for example. 1728 x KP should take about ten hours, that's totally doable.
If anything, I could have structured this retreat so that I had 1728 repetitions of pranayama per day, yet as I have said, I didn't really know what I was doing there, before this retreat I was doing only 72 x KP per day and didn't know if there's a limit. There is no limit, one can go on and on and practice. The biggest obstacle is finding an assana to sit/lay in for ten hours with a straight back. I have heard you can drink water during the practice, preferably with ghee, but that sounds like a hindu dogma to me, haha. I would try to do it in "one sitting" from 5AM to 4PM and then rest.
What I am thankful to this retreat for is showing me the benefits of such a rigid time schedule. I think I will get serious about scheduling my normal days after this retreat in a similar manner. It's something I have never done really, but makes sitting down to do the practice super easy, because you are always well slept, nourished and at the right place when there's the time to practice.
About the psychedelics, I have thought that with so much time on my hands it would be interesting to try different routes of administration for DPT. I don't recommend doing that on a retreat, it's just something I have been curious about and couldn't find a better time to do.
So, vaping DPT freebase is easy, too easy. I have wasted like 200 mg because I didn't know how to vape. First, I have had problems with freebasing it, the stuff is a very sticky brownish oil and it's such a pain to manage. So after managing to put like 15 mg from the original 60 I have puffed it and felt threshold effects. After some time I tried to put a paste of DPT mixed with baking soda inside the vaporizer with a drop of water, it has worked, but the water was a problem, I had to carefully evaporate it at around 100C and don't know if that cooking hasn't destroyed some of the molecule. I don't know because when was about to take to take a puff from the vape, I forgot to empty my lungs. Before I have exhaled the air, the DPT has condensed on the glass and made everything dirty, I have only taken into lungs like 10% of the cloud and again felt light mood enchancement. That's when I gave up the method for now. Too much pain with freebasing it correctly and it leaves a smell in the room.
So oral administration it is. I have taken 200 mg put into capsule and the other day 300 mg. It works, works like a charm. So far the best ROA for this compound IMO. I have bought my DPT at $8 a gram so I don't feel like it's too wasteful to eat that much of it for one and a half hour of tripping. 200 mg is an equivalent of 45 mg insufflated (+ intensity) and 300 mg is similar to 60 mg insufflated or 110 mg plugged (++ intensity, Shulgin's scale), but with no clogged sinuses, bad taste or bleeding from anus. At least with my metabolism. I was scared because of the reports of extra long trips, like 6-10 hours from this ROA on very high doses, but it seems to not be case, it's a standard for DPT 1.5 hour duration, although I can't be sure of what would happen at a higher dose. I don't know anything about tolerance, maybe my 300 mg trip had been weaker because of the tolerance, dunno. Takes about 40 minutes to load when taken in a capsule (might depend on the capsule you have got).
What else I have been up to? Read SantataGamana's books, started Peter Ralston's The Book of Not-Knowing, indulged in the poetry of Ryokan and Rumi when had had a break from the meditation. Poetry totally recommended for a retreat, haha. Cooked some good food, worked on mindfulness in everyday activities, had a detox from the internet, video content, smartphone, messenger, etc.
Results from the practice:
Feeling of a stronger control over the mind and its urges. Slightly elevated baseline level of consciousness. It's not much, but noticable. Learned to do Kriya Yoga well better. Found comfortable sitting postures. Some calm, spontaneus kundalini activity throughout the day. Improved concetration skills. That's it, nothing fancy, no extraordinary experiences.
Here are the sitting set-ups I recommend:

1. For Maha Mudra and sitting with legs crossed/half-lotus. The tilt from the yoga block beneath is very useful and adds comfort by lowering the knees realatively to your hips.

2. For additional comfort, put a blanket on top. It's good for cross-legged postion and sitting on your knees if you like to have knees close together and calfs apart.

3. Put a zafu on the side to sit on your knees and have a support for you butt. This position is just as good as a zen sitting bench or maybe even better. You can put a stiff blanket on top to make it higher, but it has to be stiff, it can't be a soft one, because otherwise you will be sliding to the sides and forwards/backwards.
That's all I have had to share, much love and peace.

check this out: