coburn

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Posts posted by coburn

  4. Posted

    I had the same attitude not so long ago but i changed that because it was toxic and did no good for me. Some things that helped me.

    - Why i am consuming so much news? There is more important stuff that i can focus on in my life that i can control.

    - News is biased, a newspapers could actually be filled with positive news also. But nobody wants to read that. Bad news sells.

    - Accepting that life is unpredictable and both sides of the coin are part of it, but we are also made for all this.

    - Meditation Practice

    - Having a goal or higher purpose in life

     

  6. Posted

    9 hours ago, Chadders said:

    @coburn sometimes we are triggered by flaws in others that are in ourselves that we dislike. Or perhaps there’s something this person has that deep down you desire so you have created this negative perception

    Both of these aspects are definitely playing a role here.

     

    17 hours ago, Salvijus said:

    In my experience dissociation/withdrawal/ignoring doesn't work. It just puts the feelings under the rug. But when the situation or a person pops up in your awareness, again the same feelings will surface. 

    The only thing that has ever worked for me was learning to be vulnurable, allowing all feelings to be there as it is. And let it be transformed/healed through heart's presence/energy. 

    It's a powerful advice, unfortunaly it can be tricky to explain how to tap into that energy of forgiveness. But maybe this comment will give you some hints/direction where to begin to look for an answer. 

    Great advice, yesterday i was at a place where i could not accept this feelings and fought them which made this whole thing even bigger. Accepting them made a big difference already.

     

    10 hours ago, Ulax said:

    Concentration meditation or IFS are good starts imo. Especially the former

    Whats IFS?

     

    20 hours ago, RickyFitts said:

    Investigate what's going on inside you when you do find yourself getting triggered, notice what sorts of feelings and emotions get stirred up in you when you think about this person, be very aware in your body; notice where in your body you might be feeling tightness and tension, and allow that inner resistance to release and let your body relax and breathe. As you do so, notice any feelings that might then arise, and just allow those feelings to be felt. This is likely not an issue that's going to go away overnight, so make this into a regular practice, deepen your bodily sensitivity.

    I had a bit of a bad day yesterday so i way unable to accept the emotions and let them flow. but i did a meditation in the evening and fully accepted my emotions in this moment. This alone flipped the feeling completely.

  7. Posted · Edited by coburn

    So there is this one person in my circle who i just dont like, we see us from time to time because we share some friends and interests. This person is currently taking too much space and energy in my mind.

    I dont even know why this person triggers me so much, its not like hes a bad person or anything. I just dont like the way he looks, acts and talks.

    Now i really want this person out of my head, im actually annoyed at myself for giving this person so much attention and still i cant let it go. I was contemplating for the last half hour why this is and how to let it go and i just cant move on. While i have always been a very sensitive to people around me i have never had this before.

    How can i solve this?

  8. Posted

    An important thing that helped me was instead of searching for "the one life purpose", just start looking for the little things that give you purpose in your day to day life and build up on them.

    Also try out a lot of new things that interest you or maybe that interested you as a child? There is no way around going out there and trying things, especially if you say nothing really excites you. 

    How does your current daily life look like?

  13. Posted

    On 12/7/2023 at 2:14 AM, Tomek6 said:

    If you have deep connection to your intuition your choices will not hurt you (unless you need it for some reason). If you don't have that connection it's even more fun. Just choose and experience consequences. Fear of making decision is the main reason we waste our time. Do not take yourself too seriously and dive into unknown. If something doesn't go right, survive and work on a change. Later you will consider that experience as one of the most valuable anyway.

    Thanks, that resonates with me. Im currently still a bit in the fear "mode" depending on my mental state but im also exited and happy to find out where my decisions will bring me! :-)

     

     

    On 12/8/2023 at 5:56 PM, CARDOZZO said:

    The Great Mental Models (3 Books) + Clear Thinking - all written by Shane Parrish.

    Thanks, i will check that out!

  14. Posted

    Hey guys

    What are you favorite tools, tipps or tricks for decision making? Exercises on paper, meditations, important questions whatever...

    In the coming year i have to move and find a new place (and probably city) to live. Since i have no idea what i really want atm, im looking for help in this process, where i wanna go and why.
     

    I remember Leos Video about this topic and will definitely watch it again but im also looking for your personal experiences.

     


     

  16. Posted

    I often get a bit annoyed, angry or sad reading news and i have to admit i do it too often when im bored. While its up to me to change that, im wondering if there are really any good reasons to consume "regular" news?

    Most of the stuff doesnt affect me anyway and im also unable to change or better 99% of it. If its important enough i will get informed through people around me anyway. Its seems news is just entertainment mostly.

  17. Posted

    Just saw this insane documentary about the "blob" which is a one cell organism, found all over the world, mainly in forests. They are doing different experiments which show how this organism can learn, teach and interact with its surroundings and having scences. All while just being made from one cell.

     

    What other expermients would you recommend doing with this organism?

     

     

    Its in german / french, but english subtitle are available. I really recommend watching this!

     

  25. Posted

    Couple days ago i found an interesting podcast episode (its in german, but i can post it if you like) about values and it made me think alot.

    I feel like i dont really have proper values that i live be and that stay faithful to. I mean its easy so say things like "im honest, im loyal, im openminded" but they all seam very vague and i feel like its easy to forget about them if the situation suits me.

     

    So im wondering what are your guys values? Which are not negotiable under any circumstances?