flume

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Posts posted by flume

  1. Posted

    Education - Our education system needs a serious update. Not even an update, it needs to be done all new. 70% of children who are starting school today will have a job that doesn't even exist yet. We need to foster independent thinking, teamwork and innovation in our youngsters/.

    The gap between rich and poor - Russell Brand hits the nail on the head in this video:
    "It's interesting that inequality don't even work for the people on the fruitful side of the arrangement."

    Loss of faith - "The greatest question of our time is not communism vs. individualism, not Europe vs. America, not even the East vs. the West; it is whether men can bear to live without God." - Will Durant

    Food and the Environment - The way most food is grown is ridiculous. Self-sustaining farms with fertile soil will be worth more than any money you could have on the bank soon. I'm so sure of that. 

    Anything that makes people afraid of each other like the pandemic, where the solution seems to be to keep distance. 

    Unresolved Trauma - which leads to drug abuse and a huge mental health crisis. We're wasting so much potential by not teaching children how to deal with emotions, and parents how to raise children.

  4. Posted

    Welcome to the forum^_^

    Good observation. You can't skip your way to "the absolute". Can't "skip" emotions like overwhelm, loneliness... The journey is not "going beyond" these feelings and "crazy thoughts", but actually going into them. Expressing. Releasing. 

    It all starts with feeling your body and being connected to it while speaking.

    Then all of this suddenly feels a lot less overwhelming and you'll realise that emotions & thoughts come one at a time; and they want to be released one at a time. No airy-fairy stuff, just raw thoughts and feelings. If you commit to that, only clarity remains.

    Have you ever practiced (or heard of) Radical Honesty? That's where I learned that. 

    Of course, shadow work is essential. Is your therapist helping you with integrating your past? Actually? Or just talking about it?

  5. Posted

    Great to see you want to work on it and are open about it.

    I'd definitely suggest professional help.

    The "Primal Childhood Deconditioning Retreat" by Puja Lepp totally changed my life this summer. It's the most helpful thing I've found so far. And there were many people with severe (sexual) traumas who worked through it amazingly. The thing is: You can't talk your way out of trauma, it needs to be an embodied experience. So if you can afford it in any way, make this a priority. The next one is June 3rd till June 10th in the Netherlands. It costs 2000,- but it will be the best money you've ever spent. You're in the hands of trained professionals and you get all the tools and all the room to clean up your past. I'll probably be there too^_^

    This is Pujas website: https://www.pujalepp.com

    You can set up a free call with her, tell her about your situation and she'll know what to do. 

  6. Posted

    I've dealt with that for years, and even in psychotherapy I couldn't really find out what the root was. Social expectations? Nah... It felt deeper.

    When I did primal therapy it all finally came up. In the most twisted way... My mother never "nourished" me, she (gave me the feeling she) never wanted me. Like I'm "too much". I didn't know what I was doing wrong. 

    I thought I did something wrong taking up space in this life. I literally didn't want to grow. I was sorry for all the resources I needed. As I inevitably grew though, I thought: Well, at least I have to be perfect in order to make up for all the harm I'm causing just being here. I was the best student, best girlfriend, best spiritual practitioner, best looking, best everything... All of that while taking up as little space as possible by being thin and being a people pleaser. And really, deep down I still felt like shit.

    Not saying this needs to have anything to do with your situation, but just saying that these things can run deeper than we realise sometimes.

    I talk about it a little bit in the video I just made. You might want to check it out:

     

  7. Posted

    Sounds like some serious trauma and neglect loops you're going through. Can feel like a prison you can't get out with when unaddressed. Expression is key. In case you'd like support with processing trauma, social support & expressing emotions... I have experience with that. Just send me a message and we can set up a call. No charge.

  12. Posted

    On 03/01/2022 at 6:11 AM, playdoh said:

    Whenever I have to do something there is so much resistance. Whether it be clean my room, pay my bills, or start a business, etc. The more stressful I find the task the more resistance there is. 

    The most prominent feeling I get when I have to do something is fear followed by inertia. 

    Watching Abraham Hicks videos on YouTube has helped me immensely in life  but seemingly not in this department. Basically she says never do anything unless you feel like it. “Feel good and then..”. 

    I’m looking for some tips, strategies, guidance and accountability! Would be lovely. I’ve been talking for years about starting my own business, would love to become financially independent but in a way that comes naturally and easily to me, on a consistent basis. Life comes first! Any help would be so much appreciated!

    The "feel good and then..." refers to emotional expression. Which is ideally done first, then the things that "follow" aren't (so) hard anymore. Fear is not a good motivator. And most of all, not consistent. And doesn't feel good.

    So why do you feel fear?

    We're often crippled by our past or societal conditioning without even realising it. Whatever is holding us back is deeply personal in the sense that we don't realise "This is only how I'm feeling"

    You need to get that fear "out", so to say. Through expression or understanding (or ideally: both) 

    Ever tried any emotional release exercises or any forms of shadow work?

    Also, how clear is your vision? What do you want to create? What's the bigger picture? As someone very wise once said: "Inspiration replaces motivation" 

  13. Posted

    I'm very sorry to hear that you had to go through so many tough situations in your life. I'm not having advice per se, just respect for what you went through, and that you're here, now, sharing openly and intending to change. I'm sure that you'll look back at your life one day, being able to see how these times deepened your understanding of life; even if that perspective doesn't make things better now.

    I'll say this: A simple meditation practice is the corner stone that changed my life so many years ago.

    Also: If you wanna talk to someone, I have experience in trauma work and would be happy to help, give some perspective on how to move through it and how to move on. No charge. Just send me a DM.

    All the best!

  17. Posted

    On 31/12/2021 at 7:05 PM, UnbornTao said:

    Hope you can help, especially you entrepreneurs:

    When starting a business, in my case a “self-help” online business: How do you balance being authentic vs. using hype and superficiality?

    Take a look at Leo’s content over the years, for example. The content with the most views deals with the superficial, pragmatic side of this work. With deeper topics, Actualized’s views and subscriber count has been increasing more slowly since then.

    Creating content excites me, especially when it is derived from my contemplations. Then it dawns on me: few would care. The content I have in mind is profound, authentic, and raw.

    How do you guys deal with this dilemma? What did you do in your case? How are you being effective in your business? Did it feel like selling your soul? 

    It seems to boil down to two distinctions: communication and manipulation.

    I think being authentic just comes down to sharing what you really care about, which always comes across and is the only way to keep you going anyways. I can't imagine building a brand or videos I'm not super passionate about.

    Also, definitely have a bias towards action. You don't know if people would care if you haven't tried it. I would care ^_^ And also, as long as you put yourself out there consistently, it will take off.

    Just put something out there all the freaking time. Anything. And you'll find your way. There's no shortcut. I've experimented with online, offline, videos, blogs, magazines, pictures, products, etc. You'll naturally see what you're drawn to and motivated to keep doing. Again, anything that you can keep doing AND is a passion of yours will pay off eventually. I'm sure about that!

    As Gary Vee said "Document, don't create"

    Document your journey, document what's going through your mind, what you're reading and learning and you'll never run out of content and it will always be authentic. That's how you create a tribe.

    Best of luck!

  20. Posted

    On 28/12/2021 at 2:00 AM, Hugo Oliveira said:

    I'm feeling kind of stuck in it.

    I believe that growth/flow/power will only really come through a kind of cosncious/energetic shift. And the way to make it happen is by letting go.

    However, I am resistent to abandon the practical, rational and logical approaches to the situations. 

    In sexuality for example, I'm doing many practical work (going to gym, practicing pick up), but I just feel that magic is missing and I am supeccious about the real power of these pragmatical methods.

    When I am afraid of not getting the results I want, how to navegate better betwen the energies of control/manipulation V.S. allowing/flowing/accepting?    

    Thank you!

    My 2 cents: The energetic shift that happens by "letting go", is going into the experience fully. It's counter-intuitive, but the only way out is through. The book "Letting Go" describes exactly this. It's so simple that you could dismiss it. A sort of "emotional orgasm" has to take place (through expression by yourself or with someone else), so the desire can pass through and you're clear headed & unattached when it comes to where you want to go

    Usually, our rational & logical approach is not so rational and logical, but usually fueled by unmet needs, unacknowledged desires or emotions that aren't recognised for what they're trying to tell you.

    The magic you're missing is communicating without an outcome in mind. As in: Non-manipulative (like Radical Honesty). As Matt Kahn once said "Desires don't fulfil us, only clear communication does."

    I also don't think you have to choose between the two "modes" in a situation. You can know exactly what you want to create (being proactive), without being attached to the outcome, because being clear on your intention and communicating authentically is way more fulfilling than neurotically trying to create what you want. And, paradoxically (or not) other people also respond way better to this approach, because they feel your authenticity, which is naturally attractive.

  23. Posted

    On 23/12/2021 at 5:58 PM, Ulax said:

    There is the belief that something is wrong with me

    Now that's a belief someone installed in you... The question is: Who? Your parents?

    On 23/12/2021 at 5:58 PM, Ulax said:

    Meditation, trauma therapy, healing, Pick up etc. for the past few years,

    What has worked for you? If any? (Genuinely interested to get some more details)

  24. Posted

    On 24/12/2021 at 10:52 PM, Norbert Somogyi said:

    However when you don't know, how do you find the root cause or deal with it in a way it dissipates completely?

    I think finding out why it's there is the only way. The cause might be more hidden, more unconscious, more "prior", earlier in life...? There are great breath-work techniques, visualisations, therapy... Have you tried any of those yet? What has helped you in the past?

    Do you remember (or have a sense of) when you felt anxiety in your gut the first time...?