Feel Good

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  1. The danger in identification with a belief system.
    The danger in identification with a belief system.
    The bible and other religious books make next to no sense and have fairly consistent contradictory statements throughout when read by the materialist. The materialist fails to see that the paradigm that he/ she has been operating under is nothing more than a belief system that he/ she likes to hold as ultimate truth. To a materialist the lack of evidence for something is equated with non-existence. However, when you step outside this paradigm you can ask yourself the question of: where is the evidence that something can only be true if there is evidence? Why can it not be that some things are only verifiable through intuition and awareness of the thing itself, through a direct understanding of the matter, not necessarily an intellectual one. The idea that something can only be true if comprehensible with the human mind and can be explained using what you call logic and reason, is an idea is that you merely assumed. We need to start questioning our own views before we start attacking these religious books, and by questioning I don't mean questioning through our own paradigm but instead begin to question these things epistemologically.
    A lot of the confusion surrounding these religious texts only exists because most readers are completely unaware of the grip that their current belief system has on them. Greater study into these books is required before we start attacking them. A shift in paradigm is needed. You can do all the research you want but if you are unable to step outside of your own belief system and look at these things from a new perspective, without any preconceived notions of what makes a thing true and what doesn't make a thing true and actually study these systems themselves its pretty much as good as useless. Paradigms themselves need to be studied before the content inside the paradigm is argued against. Who are we to question others beliefs if we fail to look far enough into the belief systems that surround them. This is not a problem of what is true or false, but more a question of what makes something true or false and why this is the case. Then and only then can we begin to answer such questions. How can we ever expect to agree on so called "objective truths" if we never ask these deeply epistemological questions such as: what actually makes an objective truth true? It seems whenever such a question arises it's met with: "because my belief system says so" and it says this without actually explaining its belief system and without explaining the validity of the paradigm itself.

  2. Enlightenened with an ego?
    Enlightenened with an ego?
    10,000+ hours of industrial-grade meditation or the like.
    And even then, it's dicey. Shadow issues and developmental issues will still likey remain.
    The mind is not going to be "solved" with one technique. You need a multi-pronged approach.
    And every mind is different. For some people it will be a lot easier than for others. Don't assume all minds are the same.

  3. Enlightenened with an ego?
    Enlightenened with an ego?
    Page 2 of the book.

  4. Enlightenened with an ego?
    Enlightenened with an ego?
    @Feel Good Hi, yeah I actually recently realized with Leo sharing so much about spiral dynamics the culture aspect of things.
    Whats funny is that you could almost say that its not really your ego thats ruling your life. Its the ego of the collective culture you grew up in, its all the conditioning, trauma, habbits, addictions, indoctrinations whatever... I just never thought of comparing it to spiral dynamics, because Im an empath and I can feel the energy of it really clearly in myself and other people. Now I finally know why spiral dynamics was always such an exciting topic to me! =D

    And of course, calling it "the culture" sometimes sounds a little too fluffly... in many instances the way we are conditioned is straight-up abuse. If I am to call it culture, I am almost not doing justice to the severity and depth of the pain involved.

    The fastest way to integrate the ego is through the practice of self-love and self-awareness. The ego needs love to let go of its grip because it is literally a child within your adult body. It cant be forced. Thats why the integration of the ego is the feminine side of awakening, where as the "self-realization" part of the process is the masculine part of awakening, where there is rigid discipline, self-enquiry, as Leo often stated "ripping the shit out of your ego and mind"... he probably never said these words but I cant for the love of god remember the exact ones... but thats very very accurate language.

  5. Doubts about CHAKRAS
    Doubts about CHAKRAS
    You blindly believe other people exist.
    99% of all your beliefs are blind faith. So what's one more gonna do?
    No one is asking you to believe in chakras. Yoga is a practice. You do it and see what happens. It's like looking inside a microscope. No one cares what you believe. You just look in the damn thing with enough openmindness to accept whatever shows up.
    It might take you a few years of looking to really see what's there. In the meantime, be radically openminded.
    Notice, you never asked this question about all the current nonsense you believe. You just swallowed it gullibly.
    You never asked: "Why should I believe in the number 5? Does it really exist?"
    99% of the things you think exist, don't. So what? Somehow you are still able to wake up in the morning and get things done.

  6. being and doing
    being and doing
    Detachment is not just a mere outward physical act/behaviour, where one goes off to live in a cave.   After all, you could be living in a cave, and yet be thinking about food and sex the whole time.
    Detachment is an inward quality.  The outward expression of that flows from that inward state, whatever it may be, but you don't try to imitate/conform to the (detached) outward expression.
    The fact is, you can be in the midst of a worldly life yet be totally detached from it. And conversely, you can be in the midst of a life of renunciation, yet inwardly be completely attached.

  7. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    This is so toxic and neurotic I don't even know where to begin deconstructing it.
    That's how the world looks like when you're at Tyler's level of consciousness.
    At higher levels of consciousness, it does not look like that.
    The fundamental problem with PUAs is, they want to bang the hottest 0.001% of girls, a new one very week, and when that girl rejects him or refuses to sleep with him within 4 hours of meeting him, he gets pissy and blames her for it. Because of course PUA can't be wrong by definition.
    Are young women in their early 20's attracted to low-quality men? Of course! In the same way that people are attracted to low quality food. The solution isn't to start another McDonalds. The supermodel girls in their 20's are immature and unconscious and have no idea how to select proper mates. PUA then blames and exploits them for it.
    Yes, you will definitely have more sex by manipulating girls. Just like you will definitely earn more money by manipulating and cheating customers. But that's not what you really want in the end.
    You don't really want a new supermodel girl every week. What you want is 1 girl who are able to love and build a deep relationship with. She doesn't even have to be that hot. That's your insatiable ego at work.
    The counter-intuitive move for Tyler here would be to say, "I will surrender my desire for sex with a new super-model girl every week." The problem isn't that he can't get girls. The problem is that he is trying to reach God/Infinity through sex/girls/pickup, and this will NEVER work. Materialism never works. But rather than admitting that, the PUA will blame the women.
    You have to understand that PUAs are fundamentally incapable of being in relationships because they are too narcissistic and manipulative to have an honest, intimate, loving relationship. They are too immature to be vulnerable and to commit to one woman. Many PUAs are really just sex and ego addicts without realizing it. PUA becomes just another materialist escape, no different than TV, drugs, or porn. It's a 1st and 2nd chakra activity -- driven by very low consciousness needs.

  8. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Sex based on looks is a big no no for me. I think this it too easy. But I'll be much more keen to fantasize on a man if he cumulate good looks on top of a bright personality. 
    I'm personally attracted to men who can provide extra value to my life. Deep insights, new thoughts, emotional thrills, skills I don't have, mutual support as a life partner...  All of that without alienating me as a human being and pushing me to ameliorate myself.
    I had last week a 0.01% alpha male ( 34 yrs old, good looking, top job in a premium oil trading company) asking me after a few drink straight in my face if I wanted to have sex with him. I got shaken by his bold confidence, but couldn't see any type of good outcome coming from him. The way he was seeking casual sex was repulsive to me. 

  9. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    This thread gives me the chills though. I agree and resonate with @Emerald on this issue. You guys need to hang out with women just to make some friendships first. I knew all of my boyfriends before I dated any of them, either from work, school, classes or friend of a friend , or even my friend! I was friend with my partner for one year before we really went for it. You never know. I have never dated a stranger. You guys talk about women as if we are not human. We are not that different. Maybe try and get to know us first a little bit so you can see for yourself. You wanna be with someone who you can hang out with first. Make real connections , and sexual relationships will happen naturally. 

  10. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Beauty is a form of capital. Youth is a form of capital. Beautiful young girls are extremely sought after. It is not their fault, it is the demand. If you think capital wise you are going to have to compete with those who are thinking within this paradigm. But remember than girlhood isn't a permanent state for women. Looks fade. Where are your stats for 40+ women?
    Respect for your personality and individuality is key. 
    You end up wanting someone who's liking you for better than for getting laid.
    I've noticed that this thread was talking solely about sex.
    What about a thread which would be about building intimacy and authentic relations with women? Good sex is a side product of that.

  11. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    what a jerk - sorry but no wonder, he’s so into himself. no wonder. who could account that for reality? he’s talking about women like they were animals. maybe you should listen to women talk instead or watch some movies women watch. might be you understand them better. but no wonder people think like that if they listen to this crap.
    i don‘t live in the us - so maybe in europe it‘s different. but i get what your dating problems are if everyone just takes everything for real what someone says on youtube.
    too many barbies and kens out there ;-) you‘ve got a huge group pressure.
    interesting how he applies what women often see in men to a situation he noticed in the gym. could be a woman talking about a male.
    so just try to look for non orange women... i suppose there are some out there.

  12. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Most of this thread is exactly what happens when people of one gender assume that people of the other gender get romantic attractions in the exact same way. 
    Men tend to look for women who are more physically attractive and as long as they are over a certain level of physical attractiveness, they will be attracted. It's a very objective qualifier. That's how men get attracted to women in the initial stages, using a small list of objective qualifiers. 
    Women tend to have no list of objective qualifiers, if they're using their intuition. She will not necessarily even be looking for a guy. But then she talks to a guy, and she doesn't feel something right away. Then, she's by herself and she's thinking about that guy and she notices that she feels something pleasant. So, she thinks of him more, and more pleasant feelings come. And before the five minutes it through, she's very into that particular guy. It's not because he's a super-model. It's not because he's successful. It's not because of how much money he has. It's not because of any of those things.
    It's simply because he is who he is. It's pure chemistry. 
    But it is highly selective. Very few men will ignite that response in a particular woman. Everyone else will be neutral. 
    But the fact that you've yet to ignite that response in someone, isn't because you're not in the top 20% of guys or whatever. It's because you don't spend time around a lot of women to even ignite that response in the first place. 
    Plus, women tend to be attracted to men who mirror themselves including in level of perceived value. For example, I feel 100% platonic toward super-model looking guys because they're more attractive as men than I am as a woman. So, I don't want to feel lesser. I want to feel like a catch. So, I'm much more likely to get attracted to a guy who's even with me or slightly less attractive than me than I am to get attracted to a guy who's more attractive than me. 
    But it will never be the physical looks that attract me. I'll be attracted to him because of how he makes me feel, first and foremost. 
    So, all you guys have to do is open yourself up and go out and talk to women. Eventually, someone you meet who fits your list of objective qualifiers will develop an intuitive attraction to you. 
    But don't let Tinder statistics bog you down. Women can't use their intuition over the internet. So, they have to use the more masculine mode of attraction on there to determine who they'll choose for a date by using objective qualifiers. But this isn't how real life works. Tinder is just technology, which paints a totally different picture of romance/dating that's not actually accurate. 

  13. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    it means shared inner values attract shared inner values - and only if it’s about a real relationship. if the girl goes off with a drug addict, she might have some problems with her selfesteem. she needs someone like that for what reason ever, law of opposite attraction.

  14. Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    Jordan Peterson on Incels and Female Hypergamy
    i would not recommend this you would intrude to her personal rights. that’s quiet rude.
    of course girls are drawn to attractive man - but guys are drawn to attractive girls as well. as long as it is only about the outside appearance and only about sex. but in the end (not hollywood reality) you often see a discrepancy in attractiveness in couples, one or the other way round.
    for women it‘s actually a protection when men stay monogamous - because of childcare etc. but in reality sometimes it turns out to be a trap, for both. i think most women don‘t like to share one partner with other women, not in the long run. so well you have the problem that women want to choose or what? 
    make yourself a choice, like already said. not only in your appearance, if you work on yourself and have qualities you’ll automatically attract woman who have qualities themselves.
    you can‘t change the jerks that want to have one on every finger and you can‘t change the bitches that don‘t care they are jerks. 
    if you just want to have sex with different girls - that’s another thing. 
    actually there are more women than man living on this planet. this problem might only apply to countries where they kill baby girls or do birthcontrol in support of male baby’s, they have a problem - a huge one.
    if you want to attract a woman, you have to work for that, it‘s not an itunes download. 
    the political discussion is probably more about how to protect families that would be the better idea - in the end it‘s just about how to support the family ideal. means child protection and mother protection, even if the mother is a male.
    everyone else is already doing what they want in privacy. why to get married for that if it‘s not for money support. just to have it on the papers?
    another thing is how to make man monogamous if they are not forced to care? maybe that has to start somewhere.

  15. how to find guru/master
    how to find guru/master
    Three forms of authority to be aware of.
    1. The guru
    2. The book-video
    3. The (accumulation of experience, knowledge, memory), as the i, that seeks security in time-thought. 
    Any psychological dependence on either one is to invite confusion, contradiction, and further perpetuate fear. 
    Number three seems to be the most difficult  to be aware of, as that fuels this compulsion to adhere to both #1and #2 of the first two forms of authority. 
    If #3 is understood holistically, the movement to move in accordance to #1 and #2 ends. 

  16. Help me get a slimmer face!
    Help me get a slimmer face!
    @eleveneleven Because i understand how the universe works.
    The universe is mental and all based on your personalized belief systems. You can live 1000+ years if you wanted and there are some who have and still are today. Its all MIND.
    Yes they could die if they believed so, that's why i always advise a good book/guide on fasting and self-education, self-actualizing in fasting and what not beforehand that i have mentioned many times in other posts. Fasting itself is not just a physical detox but also a spiritual experience which teaches you about limiting belief systems and that food is just another belief system you have bought into.
    I have seen and been with thin people who don't eat for months including myself which have restructured and discarded limiting belief systems allowing them to thrive either way. There are some people who don't even eat or drink anymore. If i wanted to mention something extreme i would of said that first but that would not be wise would it?
    Sometimes i am direct and seem harsh about things and i am always sorry for causing any discomfort but nevertheless the truth of the matter remains the same. I wouldn't present if it wasn't authentic and genuine to my true nature.
    Most people may not me ready yet for some information we sometimes provide, but if you weren't on any level, you simply wouldn't see what i comment or see it completely differently than presented which is similar to what is happening here.  The fact that you do notice it, triggers something within that there could be more to life that i may not know.
    All the best

  17. Help me get a slimmer face!
    Help me get a slimmer face!
    Love it.  

  18. Evil Twin of Enlightenment
    Evil Twin of Enlightenment
    @hale Hi Hale! 

    Ive had a period throughout my awakening where I had depersonalization episodes on a frequent basis. 
    It can be associated with things like anxiety disorder, but when you look at it from a more spiritual perspective, anxiety disorder or depression are just misintrepreted times of immense emotional growth.

    What depersonalization essentially is and what I have found throughout my journey is that your consciousness sometimes cant deal with the traumatic nature of the emotions happening inside of the body, so it takes an exit and checks out. 
    Here are some things that have helped me and I feel have potential to ease your teryfying experiences as well.:

    Forget about self-enquiry. Make your spiritual practice the other way around. Meaning instead of pulling away from your experience and emotions, you actually go towards it. Be interested in your experience. - You feel an emotion - What is it showing me? What does it need for me? Can I show appreciation and recognition for that part of me that feels this way? Can I give myself and all these emotions love, ins spite of the discomfort at hand.

    When overwhelmed in stressful situations, try to choose to breathe through them no matter how terryfying they might be. When your body is not relaxed, and the attention is off your breath, your subconscious mind is receiving the message that you are in danger. When you slow down, and breathe slowly and deeply, it starts receiving messages of safety and gets the opportunity to relax and unwind.

    When the actual depersonalization hits, sometimes there can be nothing done about it. It is a learning curve and eventhough very surreal and scary experience, on a subconscious level you always learn from each one. This means that you sometimes gotta experience these things without any ability to change them.
    But for sure there are things that can help a lot! 
    To ease and prevent depersonalizations, what you essentially want is to create a momentum in the opposite direction of the consciousness leaving the body, jumping out into the universe and screaming "god why did you put me here, I hate this".
    I mentioned some of the self-love and honoring your emotional body, and that is a really key point.
    Among other things, yoga to ground is really helpful, sometimes a warm beverage, spending time in nature and walking on grass (maybe even barefoot) is OH so good! And eventhough sometimes may sound kind of unspiritual (because we all frikin hashtag vegaaaaaan lol) eating meat has helped me when I needed to ground into the body.

    Grounding the consciousness into the body is a really deep and profound journey. What is actually going on is that there is a certain amount of emtional density within our bodies and the consciousness cant ground totally into the body without first healing it. So really this whole thing is just about emotional healing, thats it.

    May all this be helpful to you, I wish you best of luck on your journey, you deserve to move with incredible grace, ease and joy on your majestic path. <3 
    Much love

    And btw congrats on continuing your therapy! I know it can be really difficult opening up and talking to someone about your inner workings.
    I rememer a funny story I had actually 2 years ago!
    I was about to go to my therapist for the first time (btw later on I loved her, she was so warm and wonderful, best experience with a therapist so far).
    I was infront of the building, and because I was going through a period of reaally intense anxiety, I was obviously like 20 minutes early cuz... you know the voices in your head are telling you youre not gonna make it so you gotta fuckign run k?!
    And I was gonna go inside, but before I could do it, I was in so much anxious stress that I had to literally walk around the building like 20 times before I mustered up the courage to open that front door. It was so surreal to me that there was literally a part of me looking at this intense anxiety going like "oh my god this is amazing, I am freaked out beyond imagination." Thankfully as I came into the office, a sudden sigh of relief came over me and it felt as if I was exactly where I was supposed to be. It was a wonderful feeling.

    So believe me, I truly empathise.

  19. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Imagine a student of martial arts who is just discovering how his art connects to mind, body and emotional awareness. 
    Imagine a man who can finally admit to his weaknesses and ask for help. Imagine the relief people around him feel. 
    Imagine a man going for a vision quest to get more direction and purpose and be a better person, alone and fasting for days. 
    Imagine a man taking responsibility for his behavior towards his family, society and nature, but not out of a sense of obligation, but out of love. 
    Are they weak? Or are they worthy of respect? 

  20. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Haha, it was pretty weird to me. I've also got tested as INTP many times, and got formally diagnosed as autistic. I thought all those emotions were icky and gross and weird and ahhh . . . not touching them. But over time I stopped seeing emotions as opposite to logic, but as a partner to it. Without us being able to calm and regulate our emotions, we can't think as logically. And without logic to direct and structure emotions, we cannot deeply feel in our actions and thoughts in healthy ways.
    There's a difference between rigid logic and rationality. A difference between irrationality and deep compassion. A difference between aggressiveness with standing up for yourself. A difference between passiveness and acceptance.
    These are not the same things, and I hope you can understand them some day.  .

  21. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Do not treat stage Green as means to an end. You will never get there if you're seeing it as a disposable ladder from the start.
    Well, unless you view any other stage like that.
    Emotions are not errors in logical reasoning. They are a manifestation of a mismatch between conscious and unconscious worldviews you hold. They are a reasoning faculty that guides you according to your unconscious compass.
    If you subject yourself to your emotions and understand what they tell you, you will align your value systems and become much more integrated and therefore stronger (not in alpha sense). Stage green is a pendulum swinging 'too far' in the opposite direction from 'alpha' in pursuit of exploration of unknown territory of the Self. In order to learn, you need to explore.
    Pendulum becomes still as Yellow, with the integrated Self.

  22. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    That strength is no longer only found within oneself. Its more of a universal strength. Like nature. Which you are increasingly conscious of being a part of.
    At this point you no longer care about being masculine or not. For someone at stage blue that may seem weak. But thats because being masculinity (or a false sense of it) is very important in that particular stage. But not caring at all about being masculine is probably the most masculine thing you can do. But that will only get clear when you enter stage green.
    So in a sense, stage green might be the first stage where actual masculinity finally starts to shine. Embraced in the feminine.
    So yeah. Stage green is only a weird/weak stage when looked at from stages blue and orange. But the thing is, people in stage green have long moved on from that simplistic way of looking at things. That's why the endless debating you see nowadays is going nowhere. Its really difficult for the two stages to really understand eachother. They're competing in completely different games.

  23. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    No thats not the reason. The reason stage green is a necessary step is because emotions, empathy, connection and togetherness are very important aspects, and very wonderful aspects of the human experience and evolution. Stage green is not a means to the stage yellow, stage green is it's own spectrum of amazing treats.
    There is an immense strength to emotionality and empathy.
    Emotion is the evidence of your own evolution. Until you allow yourself to feel fully you're not evolving on the deepest level. Being able to feel sadness, loneliness, anger, joy, peace, love, despair, hate, or any other emotion to the fullest is a privilege of you becoming more evolved, wiser and open than before.

    PS, if you want any practical evidence of strength in this stage, it has the potential of making you into highly functional partner to your spouse, father to your children, friend or teacher.

  24. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Yes, this is actually a big obstacle for men, because most men are so preoccupied with appearing alpha.
    From all the criticism, judgment, and resistance that I see about Green, it feels like 50% of it is coming from males who have not sufficiently embodied their manhood, so they are insecure, and try to act macho, thereby demonizing Green.
    Which is why I said about stage Blue: embrace your feminine side. This will also apply to stage Orange males. The power of embracing your feminine side is enormous.
    To a juvenile man or "bro", Green will feel soft and weak.
    I once recommended a Matt Kahn video to a PUA coaching client of mine who was stuck in stage Orange. It was a really important video about love. He refused to listen to the advice because Matt Kahn came off as "too soft and feminine".
    The striving to be alpha and macho is really toxic.
    I was basically unable to coach him out of his issues because he was so insistent on acting out Orange to the max. He just couldn't fathom the value of Green. And yet, all of the answers to his problems lay in Green and beyond.
    The problem with Orange is that it's extremely shallow. There is no satisfaction to be found there.

  25. Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Is Stage Green A Weird One for Men (Spiral Dynamics)?
    Stage Green, at least from my vantage point,  comes off as feminine and weak.  When you read about it, there seems to be an exorbitant amount of attention placed on emotions, pacifism, and indecision.  I understand this is a necessary step to get to Stage Yellow, but I imagine for many men it must feel a little strange.  Where is the strength and vitality in this mindset?
    To stage Green or formerly Stage Green men,  are you/were you happy with yourself and your sense of masculinity at this stage?  I'm at Stage Blue for the most part, so it'd be nice to hear y'alls perspective on this topic.